Venting- feedback appreciated

[discreet]

[quote name='SpondonBassed' timestamp='1488612507' post='3250415']
I'm surprised at you Discreet.

We have a lovely drummer. He goes by the name of Dad3353 and he has a luverly set of road worn clay bongos.
[/quote]

That is true, but he lives in France.

[SpondonBassed]

Good point. I'll get my coat...

[mcnach]

[quote name='discreet' timestamp='1488578998' post='3250330']
If you could spare just one lovely drummer I'd be very grateful.
[/quote]

noooooooo, they're my preciousssssss

[discreet]

[quote name='mcnach' timestamp='1488639952' post='3250695']
noooooooo, they're my preciousssssss
[/quote]

Oh go on, I've got a nice gold ring you can have.

[T-Bay]

Even if the 'clear the air' meeting works out to some degree the differences will still be there, there may also be undercurrents and resentments from all sides depending on the outcome. If you weren't happy anyway then I doubt they are going to fulfill all the ideas you have which would improve things for you. So probably best to move on and see what else is about that fits you better.

[bazzbass]

DON'T GO TO THE MEETING !!!!

you've decided to leave, and have told them.

what's to discuss in two weeks time?

I'll tell you what will happen, the four of them will gang up on you and convince you to stay.


RUN Forrest, RUN

[Rich]

[quote name='mcnach' timestamp='1488572947' post='3250247']
mine are lovely... maybe I'm too selfish and I'm keeping all the nice ones?
[/quote]
No you're not. All the drummers I've played with have been nice guys.

[hrnn1234]

I guess now is a good time as any for an update, in case anybody was wondering...

long story short: I didn't leave the band.

I ended up going to the meeting. before that the singer wrote me a very personal email saying how much I mean to the band, and from all the bass players he's had so far I'm the best (poor guy!). He's cancelling the controversial gig as a token of how he'd rather have me in the band than any gig.

he wrote some other stuff too, so I felt that although we won't be always of the same thinking, any friction will probably be due to failed communication than just bad blood. the day of the meeting the drummer was late, so we chatted a bit among the three of us, and it was clear this was the case.

the drummer will keep being himself, he can't help it. I guess I should learn not to be bothered by that, same way you can't be mad at a child for being childish.

nevertheless he scored some big points by opening up and lowering his guard. he said that he felt somehow threatened by me and despite his attitude and appearance he is a guy very insecure of himself, and if anything that's why he's been giving me sh*t, although he doesn't thing it was very serious whatever he might have said.

it was a good thing to do. plus, it'd be a pain to look for another band- the listings here catalogue me as too old at 32, which blows, but that's how it is.

next chapter will be our manager, but I'll get to that in its due time.

thanks everyone for the support! I know I'm like that guy that goes back to his ex after you said lots of nasty things about her- sorry about that


[quote name='mcnach' timestamp='1488566879' post='3250157']
They do seem, however... 'a bit precious'. A lot of what you said would be huge red flags to me *if* I knew all that when joining. The band dynamics are not great, although you have an impeccable taste for dresses
[/quote]

that old thing??