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My first thought after reading the thread title was ‘defecate in the corner’. I think I need to speak my therapist 🤭

I've told this before. . . . A friend was looking for a guitar as a 50th birthday present to himself. The guy in the shop got down a US Strat and Rob, who was mightily impressed, said, "But this is only for playing in my bedroom." The shop guy said, "Mate, 90% of the guitars we sell are to people who play in their bedrooms, and the other 10% should do."

Whenever I buy a car, I test drive it by first revving it as hard & long as I can, hoping that people notice me. Once I have their attention I attempt a doughnut manoeuvre I saw on YouTube (I stall quite a lot, but I think I look cool). It never occurs to me to check if the breaks, clutch, gears, lights work, or if the cars structure is sound...or, heaven forbid, it fits any practical needs. OK, so my cars never leave my garage (but no one in the showroom knows that, they all think I'm the Stig maaaaan)

I'm part-way through a big long epic of a day today - more of the stars have arrived, so we're working though the tunes with them at various allotted time-slots. It's a huge production and logistical operation, with a massive crew - the band are just one cog in the wheel. Every song has to be rehearsed for lighting, camera positions, VT cues, walk-on choreography... if one part isn't right, we do it again! Like I say, I can't give anything away, but I've had a couple of OMG moments today... and I get to do it again - for real - tomorrow. Get in :-) Here's some arty shots I took during stolen moments...

This fella is 1st go to, somewhere between 200/300 gigs. It's seen SEI's, Sadowskys, Alembics, Ricks, Status, Am Deluxes all come & go. But obviously, as many tell us, it's a crap Mex

My favourite was a guy who bought an Epi 335 and a lead to go with it. Came back in complaining his new electric guitar didn’t work. he’d gone home and somehow wired a household plug onto the end of his newly acquired cable... he’d been plugging it into the mains. how he didn’t die I’ll never know.

Excellent start to the kebabing weekend, got some pussie as well. Very tasty chicken burger meal inc. chips and a drink for less than three and a half earth pounds. By default as it was the first takeaway we came across trying to escape Bolton, lost as we always are trying to get out of Bolton as they were close to closing and it was all they had left. Would defo go for this again. This little fella was in the quiet bar round the corner on his stool as he usually is keeping an eye on proceedings.

Don't let your wife/girlfriend/ significant other know that you just bought another. Safeguards the bass and your nads.

Typical bass player doing it up the corner, come on why not right by the front door near the till!

Specific measurements are all well and good, but action is subjective. If you're getting buzzes and rattles then it's too low, if you can't play properly because it's too much effort to press the strings to the board then it's too high. If your bass is sounding good and is comfortable, it intonates properly and it feels right to you, then it is right.

Happy Christmas 😟

They probably assumed it was Eighties and gave you the benefit of the doubt.

If it’s bespoke stuff you want,you need to try Stagewear Unlimited. Based near Rotherham, you can get pretty much anything made to order, and the boss Neil Crossland has a mass of experience making stuff for all sorts of bands as well as theatrical costumes for televison and theatre. Tel. 01709 892893 www.stagewearunlimited.com

So long story short. My band (State of Ember) entered a competition last year as an easy way to gain more fans. The prize was top 10 bands end up on Wreckfest by THQNORDIC. We only went and finished 2nd and now we're being featured on their official trailer! Oh and they are giving us 1000 Dollars. Madness Facebook link below should work! https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=617813701889412&id=369063106512335

F*cking slap. It's so boring to hear the same thing in any shop...

I've noticed that the only time I get GAS is when I'm not playing or practicing as much as normal, or if i'm stressed with some other part of life. I'm sure this doesn't just happen to me. Usually happens if I'm tired from work overload, so my playing is either uninspired or lacking energy, and my brain tries to blame the instrument. It's difficult to feel excited when you've not had a day off work for weeks or you're short on sleep. Also happens if you keep playing the same stuff rather than learning something new. It's just boredom and lack of inspiration. I find that GAS completely goes away if I get a good night's sleep and focus on learning something new. But it took me quite a few years to work this out.

Hi guys, Just wanted to say hi and thanks so much for the kind words, I'm humbled.. I feel really lucky to have been asked to play in some great shows and don't take it for granted.. I played in 'The Book of Mormon' for 3 and 1/2 years and the MD of that show was leaving to start 'Dreamgirls' and he kindly asked if I wanted to move across with him.. I'm glad I did as it's turning out to be a really fun show, and a great play for a bass player.. It hasn't been done for 35 years but still sounds fresh in my opinion.. In Amber Riley's defence, we appeared on the Graham Norton show before the musical had even opened.. We had just met her and read the chart down that morning.. She had zero experience singing with a band at that point and was extremely nervous I think.. She's quickly settled into the show and sounds amazing I have to say, and with that confidence comes a bit of light and shade in her performance.. I think if you saw her live now you'd be really impressed, she brings the house down every night! Regarding gear, I exclusively use Overwater basses now. I have two Jazz 5's and a hybrid Jazz 5 fretless.. They're all wonderful and I highly recommend them, Chris May and the guys at Overwater have been honing their art for many years now and the results are there to see.. A lot of West End players use them as they're reliable, extremely playable and free of hum/buzz/interference which is important in theatres.. I'm particularly impressed with the John East Uni-Pre at the moment and that's in the black bass in the clip above.. Check their basses out at http://overwaterbasses.com (and no I don't get a tenner for saying that!). Well thanks again, all the best....

My First Assembly - '76' Jazz Bass Sound Clip As a committed P-bass man of more than 40 years, I have a long-standing love/hate relationship with Jazz basses. I like how they look (mostly), I like how they sound (sort of) and I like how they play (up to a point). And yet… when I don’t have one I want one, and when I have one, I’m always looking to move it on… WHY?? My most recent GAS was for an aged Oly White late 70s-type Jazz with a black guard and maple neck - you know the vibe - but without blocks and binding... I don’t like blocks and binding. So I put one together, or at least as close as I could get. This is the first time I’ve ever assembled a bass from bits and the first time I’ve finished a body and neck from the raw wood. I’m fairly pleased with the results, given I’m a complete noob and it was all done with rattle cans. It’s not perfect, but the next one will be better. I learned a lot about the nature of nitro lacquer and the processes of sanding and wet-sanding …and how a bass goes together. Constantly learn new stuff folks, it keeps dementia at bay! Now… what did I come in here for again..? Specifications Paulownia lightweight Jazz body, vintage white Canadian rock maple Jazz neck with maple cap, amber tint Black 3-ply pickguard Alan Entwistle JBX Jazz pickups Schaller BMFL-C 70s tuners Kluson 70s Jazz bridge with slotted-screw saddles Fender CIJ 62 RI control plate, knobs and electrics Fender ‘F’ stamp neck plate with black cushion Fender string tree Fender strap buttons Fender 1969-1976 Type ‘C’ decal D'Addario NYXL 45100 roundwound strings Weight: 7lbs 7oz (very light!) I couldn't decide which pickups to fit. Fralins? Lollars? DiMarzios? To be honest, I was running out of cash so I bought a pair of Alan Entwistle’s JBX pickups, having read some good reviews here and elsewhere. I planned to substitute them with something more prestigious as funds allowed. But! When I soldered them in and fired them up, I was pleasantly surprised. I thought they’d be OK, but they're better than good, they're great. So I'm keeping 'em. What I didn't expect was for the bass to be so light. In fact, the Schallers make it a little neck-heavy, so I may just get some of those licensed Hipshot Ultralites for maximum calorie-loss, in which case the bass will weigh in at around 7lbs. Very rare for a Jazz bass, especially when you consider some of the old 70s examples were real boat anchors. The first to point out what's missing wins half a biro. Good luck!

Hi, everybody ! I wanted to share with you guys the works of the french luthier Patrick Cosme. I'm the proud owner of several instruments he hand-crafted :-D He makes custom hand-made intruments, and has recently started a vintage design instruments serie. I had the occasion to try some of them, and man ! Patrick is not only a fantastic luthier, but also an amazing bassist, and he has an "inside view" of the making of the instrument. He made fretted, fretless, chambered body, fanned fret, piccolo, midi basses, and the "vintage" basses!!! Here are pictures of different instruments, hope you'll enjoy them !

Mine came packaged as Status...

Some really nice designs among those posted....I even like some of the headed ones.

Good evening, Romain, and ... Plenty to read and amuse you here, and lots to learn and share.

COG T16 v1 and v2 The COG T16 v1 has been for a little while my personal favourite octaver. I particularly liked its: - clean blend down - ability to play nicely with other pedal on my board - almost complete absence of latency when tracking - that it had a tiny footprint on my pedal board I'd have liked it to be able to track lower before it started glitching (it handles an A on the E string fine, then starts to struggle) but when it did glitch it did so in a relative 'tidy' fashion. The 'Filter'(sub) by itself lacked volume and when you dialled the 'Clean' knob right back the Filter/sub was pretty inaudible and you couldn't compensate by turning up the volume on your amp. The Clean was effectively acting as a volume control for the Filter/sub. But I kinda thought "so what, I'm mainly using this to fill out my sound and that clean blend octave down with almost zero latency is just great!" In terms of dial settings my preferred setting which gave a great clean octave down and the same volume with the pedal bypassed: Clean 5/10 Down 8/10 Filter* 6/10 (and this added a touch of 'dirt' spice to the clean) [* as those of you who have the T16s this is dialled in the opposite direction i.e. anti-clockwise to the Clean and Down] They say "you don't miss what you have until it's gone". Well I guess with the T16 v1 it's turned out to be a case of "you will miss what you've never had!"... so moving onto the COG T16 v2. I'd say there were two key differences: First of all this thing is just LOUDER! If you want to use this thing as a pre-amp boost, believe, me it will work! Dialling in my fav v1 octave down tone on the v2 is as follows: Clean 2/10 Down 5/10 Filter 2/10 The second big difference is that Clean is no longer the de-facto volume control for the Filter, the Down is. So it's now possible to dial-off the Clean entirely and get a pure 'subby' sound using the Down and Filter; the timbre of that subby sound will be controlled by the Filter and the volume by the Down. The timbre range includes the much loved fat Boss OC2 sub tone. As an analog pedal, the T16 v2 could, in some ways, be said to be the 'spiritual heir' to the OC2 in a way that its actual successor, the digital Boss OC3, never quite managed to pull off, or indeed the T16 v1 didn't either due to the lack of volume when the Filter was engaged without the Clean. So after my initial shock at: wow this is a different little beast(!), I'm rapidly coming to the conclusion that Tom George at COG has just taken his superb little pedal in the shape of the T16 v1 and made it even better.

Try slapping on a 12! That's Tonto!

When the strings need changing it's time to sell it and buy another one.

I bought a strap from Tomas. Good guy to deal with and great communication. Would be more than happy to deal with him again.

I have played with a compressor for years and tried a couple of practises and a gig without. i then went straight back to using it!

A better bass, isn't always better!!

The height of the bridge should be taken in to account when choosing the neck angle, a decent plan to begin with and 'high bridge' problems can be avoided. This makes me question the whole construction process.

When trying out a bass in a shop I always find “The Theme From Star Trek Deep Space Nine” falling under my fingertips. Only ever been called out on it once... lovely tune, though.

....well...actually, ...I know that it's not the same thing, but it kind of is. I have an old MIM Fender deluxe PJ from 1996, and despite being constantly told that it can't be good because it's a MIM, it really is a great bass in every way. If that bass is doing it for you then then why buy an expensive imitation?

Definition: Bass Bash is a term used for a day hiding from your so-called loved ones (family) to spend with your true love ones (instruments) and other like minded individuals in a secret location known only to those who play the aforementioned gear and frequent these forums. There are the odd exceptions, Happy Jack/ Bluejay, Grangur and Mrs Grangur, and Silverfoxnik & Hamster whose lovely wives (only one each) support these events with copious cups of tea and cakes. However, normally they are populated by sad old gits who want to talk about a subject (The Bass guitar and equipment) that no other band member or "normal" member of society can even bear to. Along with the attendees, you will find some beautiful examples of the luthiers' art which are available for the aforementioned sad old gits to try and discuss at their leisure. Other features of Bass Bashes are seminars and gear trials, (seemingly) never ending Raffles, and of course a great review by our own Bluejay which is generally better than the event itself. Stay tuned to the "Events" thread for details of your next/nearest one.

Cricket was intentionally designed to be overly long and intricate and difficult for outsiders to understand, in order to deter the rest of world from wanting to beat us at it. That plan didn't quite work out.

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The thread title has given me the name for a new band!

This state of the art factory on the Thames Estuary is in tip-top condition thanks to our lucrative deregulated service economy. And the steel mill at top elite property hotspot, the Isle of Sheppey - a.k.a Kent's own Monte Carlo - is running at full steam, bringing jobs and money to the community thanks to our lucrative trade deals with China. Here is a picture of Sheppey's high-rolling and glamorous community, reaping the benefits of our lucrative trade deals, and celebrating their booming local economy. (This photo is an accurate representation of all of England about 2 years from now).

The Le Bass is a very good pedal and has some loyal fans on BC. +1 for Focusrite 6i6 into Reaper (exactly the same set up as I'm planning on using!)

Tapewounds are wound with plastic and are usually roundwound under the tape ... http://www.bassstringsonline.com/Black-Nylon-Tapewounds_ep_49-1.html

I'm in. I'll bring, er, whatever I've got at the time (probably 3 or 4 5-stringers) and, of course................. ' it ' . You all wanna play it, you know you do!

Steve is a great guy to deal with, trustworthy and everything was there as he said it would be, don't hesitate to buy or sell to him Thanks again Steve catch up with you soon

I bought a bass off Steve a week ago: Not only did I get a bargain price for the bass, I also got a free hard case and pair of strings thrown in too! - Not to mention free delivery which he offered as I was talking to him about my current situation. He really didn't have to add these extras in, but he did because he's a top guy. Would definitely recommend!

Swapped/traded a Tecamp Puma 1000w for a GK rb1001 and some dollar recently. Easy dealings and super genuine guy. I love easy dealings! Thanks Steve and enjoy the Puma!

I bought a Fodera NYC from Steve. Perfect communication, very friendly. He is one of the guys you would have a couple of beers with. I got a great bass at a very good price. Thank you.

I bought Steve's Demeter amp. Unfortunately it arrived in a less than perfect condition courtesy of an over-energetic courier! Despite Steve's superb packing the amp had a fault, which was, unfortunately, irreparable. Throughout Steve was great to deal with, made every effort to sort the problem quickly, went out of his way to get the courier issue resolved and made a swift refund. A genuinely great guy to deal with...next time, Steve

Steve brought my Zvex WM from me after I'd told him he couldnt have it Top geezer Would not hesitate to deal with him again!

Just sold a Markbass cab to Steve. Hassle free and quick transaction. Buyers & sellers can deal with confidence and as aforementioned he is indeed a decent chappy, enjoy the MB matey

Sold Steve my Marilyn. First rate BCer.

I sold a few books to Steve, very prompt payment. Recommended.