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Got booked for a private gig - 40th birthday party - but the chap said all his biker mates from his club would be there and we could expect 200+ people to be there. Arrived at the address he gave us for the venue and were a bit confused at first as we couldn't see and pubs, halls, hotels or anything that looked like a venue for a party - just a big council housing estate. He then comes out of his garden gate and calls us into his small back garden where he's just about managed to fit an old army mess tent for us to play in. We got to play for him and his immediate family (literally him, his wife, 2 kids and his elderly parents). Turns out he didn't even own a motorcycle let alone be in a biker club - or apparently have any friends. The low point of the evening (although only one of many) was when he got into a fist fight with one of his neighbours over the noise. The high point was watching his elderly parents slow dancing romantically and not letting the fact that we were playing Paranoid at the time put them off.

Some crazy woman booked us (via an agent we have since parted company with) to play a 60th bday party. The address was something like "Fawson Hall". Turned out that was the name she called her 2 bed semi in milton Keynes. We arrived in pouring rain to be told we would be playing in the garden which was approx 5m x 8m. We were shoehorned in under a pergola but as there was no cover anywhere else in the garden all the guests (about 20 max) stayed in the dining room with the patio doors open. She paid over £800 for the privilege. Tried to book us again this year but luckily we're already booked on the date she wants. Video evidence :

My Jake! I kinda bought is as backup for my Elwood L5, figuring that a J type and a P type would cover everything. Wrong, the P type has everything covered by itself. The Elwood is lighter, a pleasure to play and weighs nothing. It has a lovely range of tones from the preamp, but for all its simplicity the passive Jake blows it away. I had them wire it volume, pan and tone as that's what I prefer, and it's just perfect. The output from those Delanos is monstrous too. Occasionally, usually in practice, I miss the 24 frets and easy top end access of it's brother, but it's always my first choice.

Yup, classic fail for a wedding / function is to let someone who's a massive fan of a particular band / style of music book the entertainment. Been to many such events that have been a sorry (and often expensive mistake. ) You really have to go for what will appeal to most of the audience for most of the event - bearing in mind you will never ever please everyone. When I was in a function band playing at a wedding with usually a wide spread of ages/tastes in the audience, we'd usually start with some quiet-ish old stuff (Sinatra etc) for the more elderly folks to enjoy and dance to. The younger people would be at the bar or occasionally join in with the dancing, but generally be far more open minded about this than the old folk were about modern material. By the time we'd got round to the loud more current stuff the oldies would have left anyway, so everyone happy. Not exactly rocket science, but seen many pub rock bands struggle to keep any sort of audience in these circumstances.

Last night's gig was one I will never forget, and for all the right reasons. My first time out with The Grateful Dudes, and established Grateful Dead covers band I joined in January. Longest drive to a gig (yet) at just over 200 miles each way, best venue I've played in (Hebden Bridge Trades Club) and by far the most accomplished bunch of musicians I've ever played with. Decent sized crowd, lots of people dancing, sold quite a few band T shirts, people queueing up to shake for hands and/or hug us, very positive feelings all round. Drove home in pouring rain with periods of sleet, lot of standing water on the motorways, and the end of our road here flooded, so had to drive with great care for the last hundred yards. I was away for 18 hours, covered about 420 miles and I'd do again next week if we had a gig lined up. Next one's not until July at the moment, though. Somehow, it added up to so much more than just another gig.

It was worse. Blue

She shouldn't have to, but 2018 is not exactly a time of tolerance and human compassion. We're in an era of intellectual regression. Actually it's not quite as simple as that. We're in an era abundant with intellectual progress and tolerance, which is being stifled by an increasingly dumb, aggressive and intolerant ageing population, who wish it was still 1842. And thanks to the miracle of modern medicine, they're out there shuffling about in huge numbers, and they will live until they're 136 years old. So it's going to take a long time for attitudes to change significantly.

I’ve recently started the build of a ridiculous idea. A 20” scale bass. The body and neck are from an old mahog bookshelf I’ve already got 3 bodies from. The idea is to use the low 4 string of a 5 string and tune them up to whatever the correct tension is. It will be, at most, a step up from standard. It won’t have a truss rod, just a graphite rod. The neck is tiny and half of it is in a neck pocket anyway. Ive just planed down the neck and shaped the body. The neck looks very thick in the photos but that was not it’s proper thickness. I’m using a piezo bridge only.

I find the turn that this thread has taken rather bizarre. While one might reasonably claim that the gender of an instrumentalist is, or should be, of no relevance to their suitability for any given band, this cannot be said of singers. The male voice is, in most cases, intrinsically quite different from the female voice in range and timbre, and a band seeking a vocalist might well have good reasons for preferring one over the other. It would be odd then, surely, for a vocalist advertising their services not to specify their gender. In the case of transgender women, the situation is a little complex, as vocal reassigment is one of the more challenging parts of the process. This is what the (US) National Association of Teachers of Singing has to say on the matter: A transgender woman will have gone through puberty as a male. Her larynx enlarged and descended in the neck, the vocal folds became thicker and longer and the voice deepened into an adult male voice. Once puberty is complete, there is nothing that can reverse the process so she may choose voice therapy or phonosurgery to sound more feminine. Voice therapy should be undertaken with a speech-language pathologist qualified to work in this area. Voice therapy goals include raising the average speaking pitch, usually to an androgynous pitch area and modifying voice quality, resonance and inflectional patterns. There are several phonosurgical procedures used to raise speaking pitch and eliminate lower pitches. However, these are controversial, the outcomes are mixed and they don’t address other vocal characteristics, such as resonance or voice quality. (https://www.nats.org/cgi/page.cgi/_article.html/What_s_New/Training_the_Transgender_Singer_Finding_the_Voice_Inside) For the advertiser to describe herself simply as a female singer could therefore be misleading. Quite reasonably, she has specified her gender as "transwoman". As has already been pointed out, this is in no way a description of her sexuality, which is of course entirely irrelevant. The fact that she has felt free to describe herself in this way could be seen as a positive and welcome sign of increasing acceptance of trans people. Some here, however, perversely choose to interpret it as evidence of intolerance. There seems to be a view that any suggestion that a transgender person is not in all respects the same as someone born to that gender constitutes some kind of hate-speech. It isn't; it's just an acceptance of reality. Maybe one day medical science will advance to the point where that view is justified, but we are not there yet. The fact that this issue has triggered an intolerant hate-filled rant against an entire generation just shows that when it comes to self-righteous bigotry, there are some amongst those who consider themselves "progressives" who could give any US evangelist preacher a run for their money.

For a moment I thought you meant Line 6 Helix, which added another layer of comedy for me

So how are you finding the Spectradrive, Dave?

I have an ACG EQ02 (only 1 low pass filter shared between both pickups) in my Status bass and If you like filter pre's then you'll like the EQ01. As you surmise, it does all the Wal/ Alembic stuff but with much greater flexibility. Both low pass filters have such a range that they can even be used a treble boosts as well as going down to virtually sub bass depths. If you're anything like me, you will need to spend some time with it if you're going to be switching loads of tones around in a live setting but it doesn't take long. For recording, it's excellent - you can dial in just about any sort of sound you imagine. In one of the bands I play with, we do house rehearsals and I play through a wee "busker" combo which is the most horrible, boxy sounding amp I've used for decades. The EQ02 equipped Status is the only bass I have which can completely cancel out all the bad aspects of that amp and provide a beautiful, full, rich and crisp bass sound with no help from external eq's etc.

Even schools do gender swaps on Romeo and Juliet, this can't be such an arcane idea If a vocalist did take issue with lyrics somewhere, I guess it would be down to them to say so, not down to everyone else to decide it's not good for them to sing because of their gender/sex.

Ill agree with that. There are quite a few of these type of boxes already out, and the one thing that puts me off is they are all trying to do so much. Ok, the SD could have had more things on it, but when to stop? A tuner would have been good, but that would involve a display of some kind, which I’m sure would push the cost up and maybe make the box larger. the thing that jumped out of Rome was that it offerese just what I need, in a box the size I want, with an effect I’m already using so wont lose out by replacing it with the SD. It’s still way under the cost of the Darkglas Ultra boxes, and for me at least, much more usable in more than one situation. .

I'd argue that we live in a liberal and open minded country, and we just keep becoming more liberal and open minded. Comparatively of course. I also think it's more to do with culture than age, and some cultures are more traditional than others regardless of age. Oh and it's not that new is it? In 1977 when I was a would-be young punk, transgender Wayne Country and the Electric chairs had their famous single out called 'F#ck Off'.

Is that my one? They were a shade under £1250 in 2005.

It seems like, as with most bands, you have a requirement for a vocalist, regardless of gender/sex. If you're really having trouble with female vocalists, maybe the problem is you and your band-mates, and not all women.

Terrible commute.

In my ELO tribute band (not the one you mention thank goodness...) we occasionally get asked to perform at private functions, usually by people who are fans of ELO stuff. We always decline, on the basis that most of the audience won't be.

Many years ago, I was asked if my band would play the Inland Revenue (UK version of the IRS), fraud squad's, Christmas party. I had to turn them down. That would most definitely be 'The wrong crowd' for my then band

I like the way it looks like a miniature AJ Presentation bass. But without the bulk, if you see what I mean. Good to see Sting following your lead Ped!

Two things would stop me being interested - country, and western.

I think this hits the nail on the head. I've bought well, along with one purchase a while back that I still pinch myself about. I could do with getting rid of a couple, but I have space and there's no urgency to do so.

2-3 basses isn't so many in quantity. As a new Dad, the money could be an issue for some follk. If you need money to feed the children, then you can't argue against needing to sell, or gig to get more money. As for they amount of money, I guess £6k is the new value? Well I guess you won't be able to get all that back if you sell. So, the damage is done. In any case, you need to be realistic in terms of what they would sell for. Good luck with the family. Stop feeling guilty. Get some sleep, and deal with problems as they come up. Everything seems worse in the middle of the night.

Got mine strung with flats at the moment for a bit of contrast with my other basses and it sounds lovely. All 3 of my gigging basses are 5 string passives - the other 2 being a Fender modern player Jazz (which like the Gibson is loaded with a pair of coil-tappable humbuckers) and my main bass which is a Squier VM P5. I love the Squier - it just suits me perfectly despite being one of the cheapest basses I've ever owned - and it is my clear number one overall. I do have to concede though that the Gibson has the better low B.

What the f*cking hell is this crap? I'm a Boomer and strongly resent the implication that I'm an angry, bitter old windbag. Actually, I may well be angry and bitter and indeed a windbag, but only because I'm sick of endless injustice and blame being meted out to the poorest and most vulnerable people in society (by all age groups) when it should be aimed at those greedy, ruthless bastards who would aspire to wealth and power at any cost. Yes, I'm of 'that' generation. What of it? Are you really going to start blaming older people en masse for society's ills? We're not all swivel-eyed, prejudiced Mail-reading conservative Leave-voting nutcases. Shame on you for your sweeping (and totally inaccurate) ageist generalisations. I don't accept them and it's quite wrong to have made them. You might expect such comments on FB or YT, but not on BC. Very poor.

I read that their readership is declining, as are their finances. It would be so sad if they went bust.

I took a chance on a Maruszczyk Jake 5p on the for sale boards on here a couple of years ago. Haven't wanted anything else since. If I'd had the choice I'd probably have gone for the haussel pups instead of the delano but it plays beautifully.

Wish it was. Probably a bit harsh, I know, but I don't know of anyone under 25 who even remotely cares about sexual orientation, gender or race. Sexual orientation is largely a problem for old people. As mentioned above, the media that old people rely on for information definitely doesn't help. In fact one of the main reasons behind the current big divide between generations is that traditional media is almost completely ignored by young people, so their impression of the world is completely different to those who still read newspapers and watch tv. Now this is obviously a generalization - there are exceptions, but in generational terms the division is clear.

She is I believe male to female. Good luck to her, though in 2018 she really shouldn't need to fear any kind of prejudice or childishness. I guess she's just being honest about it.

No contest, my new Maruszczyk Jake 5 custom shop.

Problem fixed! The new driver arrived today. It's now fitted and all is sounding pretty good. Lee chucked in some Ashdown freebies too. I can sit in the freezing North with my Ashdown hat on, drinking a hot cup of tea from my Ashdown cup and rest it upon my Ashdown coasters! All in all, I'm very pleased with the outcome. A big thanks to eude and Lee for sorting it.

These are not just random accomplished players - they're three friends whose faces I've seen light up playing those specific instruments, and also who I'm confident will value them for being mine. I'm lucky to have enough musician family and friends that I can be sure my basses and guitars will be cherished and not just sold off. Those three don't include my grandson, who at this rate will take over my Aerodyne long before I'm ready to part with it :-)

Couldn’t agree more. The box would need to be bigger to comfortably accommodate much more without feeling cramped. TC have a nice features-to-footprint ratio here.

Is there a prize we can award for the most dispiriting, negative, unpleasant topic of the month? Not the OP, not the subject matter. But the blend of arrogance, condescension, generalisation and pigeon-holing that has been attracted.

I wouldn't worry too much about it, even though it really is all your fault.

Yeah, I’d like to read a bit more about it first. If only to see what the cons are. Im very impatient though, and about to spend the afternoon at RAF Duxford, so might get bored and push the buy now lol.

One option would be to set the para eq at first position in the patch chain and just adjust the level of this effect according to the output of the basses you are using.

I'm not sure where you get that idea from.

I get my stuff done at Curvy Sounds in Heaton, he always does a good job for me and his prices are reasonable. He does get a bit of a backlog of work in at times so it's always worth ringing around to see who can get your instrument sorted the quickest. The only one I'd dodge would be the guy at Guitar Guitar, he did a total butcher job on an electric guitar of mine years ago and I've never trusted his work since.

That will take some beating.

Yeah, with Walter Becker adding some kind of voice box over the same notes? or was that another SD tune? Chuck tells a great story about a session for ‘Mash’, when he met Tommy Tedesco. It’s on YouTube somewhere. He really is one of my all time, favourite groovers, a real gem of a player. Edit: The interview (mentioned above).

@Pinball - ok "Ref." is it definitely 'off-side' to include active 5 string basses that have a passive mode toggle? In which case we can include pretty much every decent 5 string bass going(!) and the title becomes "5 Strings - what are your favourites?". I'll just give Ibanez and Sandberg a quick mention, too, if we're doing that!

That's one thing I love about Basschat. You can never tell which thread is going to descend into handbags at 10 paces!

Once I've driven home and unloaded the car, I relax with a couple of large whiskies, then sleep is fairly easy.

You know when someone bakes you a birthday guitar cake and that person hasn't got a clue what the difference between a Les Paul and Double bass is, this bass looks like that cake.