I was in a job-role where at 24hrs notice I could literally be asked to work anywhere in mainland UK, only exception was when on leave. As such I could only agree to gigs when on leave. Annoyingly for the few years I did that role there were very few times where the dreaded call would come in, so numerous gigs I (and as such the band) had to turn down we could have done.
Luckily we were all mates first before being band-mates so they all understood, or at least it was never mentioned to me, and I was the last man into the band so not like I held any sway over anything.