It's a nightmare Al, I have to agree, and I'm in a similar boat at this time.
I've been close to jacking it in altogether a few times, and like you, I was going to keep one bass and jam along to CDs at home through my Tascam and phones, just for my own pleasure. Sometimes I feel I get as much enjoyment from doing that than rehearsing week in week out, with a gig or two once a month.
My problem is that we rehearse almost every week, but as we're all busy at work, we don't have time to go out looking for gigs (lame excuse, I know), or more to the point can't be arsed, and we don't gig enough, making rehearsing a chore. One of the band is a copper and works shifts, and regularly has to cancel gigs and jams at the last minute.
However, I always come back to wanting to play live, and it just aint the same playing at home. I think my problem is I'm bored with playing rock music, something I've always done. I need a new challenge, and I'm hankering for either a soul/funk band or a reggae outfit to join. I'm bored to death with rock.
Also, the stuff you played us round at Pete's place a couple of weeks ago, the blues band you're in, was pure class, really really cool music, and well worth hanging in there for in my opinion, even if it is sporadic.
Who knows where it'll all end, all I know is, I've tried to jack music in, on numerous occasions, and failed. I love it too much. Hang in there.