KingBollock

When I was 12 (also in 1987), what I wanted, more than anything else in all the world, was a radio controlled monster truck, the Tamiya Vanessa’s Lunchbox. But my dad had the idea that he could get rich by making my brothers and me learn to play instruments and play together as a band, that he would manage. For some reason he decided I was going to be a drummer… i knew I was never going to get the truck, but I wasn’t going to let him have it all his way. Being a huge Motörhead and Iron Maiden fan, I decided I wanted to play the bass. I approached my dad with this idea and he admitted that he hadn’t even thought about the bass and that it was a good idea. it was probably the only good thing he ever did for me. I am the only brother that kept playing. I finally got my Lunchbox two years ago and I love it!

Not exactly. I didn’t sell the bass until I was in my twenties. Ironically, there was a period, when I was 18 (just after splitting up with my ex), where I was homeless, but I still managed to hang on to my bass (it was being looked after for me). Everything went to pot after I got married. i only mentioned my 18th because of the cake.

Yeah, this was over twenty years ago, and it still hurts to think about it.

Cash Converters… We got into serious money trouble, through no fault of mine and it’s something I am still bitter about. I loved that bass more than I can express, for more reasons than I want to go into… it was a Westone Raider I in the silver/grey colour scheme. This isn’t mine, I have no photos of mine (and my ex kept the photos of my 18th birthday cake that was made in it’s image). Annoyingly, I just found this photo while Googling, and found it on BassChat from a year ago, where it was pointed out that it hadn’t sold on eBay. If only I had come back to BassChat a year earlier!

You’d hate some of my home made pedals then, they have really pretentious names. Such as: Dank And Fetid Earth Beneath A Doom Coloured Sun, which is two different modded Big Muffs (a Musket and a ‘73 Ram’s Head. Both further modified by me) in one box. And: The Scent Of Red Ruin Borne Upon A Mourning Breeze, which is a heavily modified Body Rot II. Half the fun is coming up with names for them!

When I saw them the crowd were ok. My wife and I went to a pub near to the venue before the gig and it was full of people also waiting for the same gig. The whole place had a fun vibe and there was a great Macc Lads singalong. My wife got serenaded with Julie The Schoolie (despite being 26) every time she went to the bar or the bog, which she though was hilarious. The walk from the pub to the venue was both surreal and menacing, but had nothing to do with the Macc Lads crowd. What I didn’t like was all the snot. We stood right at the back because the air, for three feet above the audience, was solid with spit. It was one of the most horrific things I have ever seen! One particularly large loogy landed on Muttley’s t-shirt and one of the guitarists (I can’t remember who) sucked it off… I nearly threw up! It was then that I understood the reference to Muttley looking like a Christmas tree on the Live At Leeds (The Who?) album.

He was the cause of my first ever case of piles! I’m not even joking! He was supposed to be supporting the Macc Lads when I saw them, but he never turned up. I sat on that cold, hard Wulfrun Hall floor for two and a half hours before the Macc Lads finally got on stage! i was really looking forward to him, too, because he had songs on early Macc Lads demos/EPs.

When I was a kid, around 1990ish, I was asked what my ideal bass would be. At the time BC Rich didn’t actually make what I described, which was basically the Warlock NT with the Widow headstock. When they did make them they only did for ten years, but I wasn’t in a position to buy one. Then, one day, one turned up on eBay for £215 including postage (which also included a Warwick coffin case that wasn’t mentioned in the advert). It was a gamble because that was still a lot of money for me, and the photos were terrible. I had no real idea what condition it was in. Cosmetically it was perfect. However… When it came it was unplayable. The action was like a suspension bridge and must have come out of the factory like that. Being a neck-through, I couldn’t shim it, and I couldn’t find a new bridge thin enough. I tried making new saddles from aluminium, but they were so thin that I struggled to tap them for the screws without deforming them. In the end I ground the bottom off the existing saddles and that fixed it. I also struggled to find strings that it liked until last year when I decided to try a really light (40 - 100) set. And now it plays and sounds ace. There are things I would like to do to it, but I don’t really have to. I like the idea of a more versatile preamp, but I don’t think there’s room in the cavity. I also like the look of the DiMarzio DP127 blade pickups, but I don’t know if they would sound right, it’s just the look I would be going for. But it would need two sets. So none of that will probably ever happen. However, I would like a Hipshot D-Tuner on it, which would mean matching the other machine heads. I almost certainly will do that. So, after saying all that, it’s not perfect, yet, but I love it.

Yup, Chubby Brown is still touring. I, too, am a fan of Frankie Boyle. I like Jimmy Carr as well. One thing I really like about both of those is that they genuinely enjoy humour. That might sound like a strange thing to say, but some comedians never seem to laugh, but watching Jimmy and Frankie corpsing to something they’ve just heard is a joy to see.

Thanks! It’s good to be back.

That’s good to hear. I can’t remember specifically what he’d said, but I got the impression of a grumpy old bloke complaining about immigrants. But then I am happy to be wrong.

Are your parents Stevie Wonder and Paul McCartney?

I used to love Chubby Brown when I was a kid (my mum used to practically wet herself at that funny little dance he does). But I remember seeing a documentary about him years ago and being really disappointed that his “views” didn’t stay on the stage. He actually reminded me of my dad… I had a similar thing with the Macc Lads. I saw a couple of their more recent gigs on YouTube and Mutley came across just as bigoted as their music suggests. Without the “excuse” of youth, it seemed really sad, unfortunately. Mind you, I’ve been listening to them for 34 years and don’t want to stop. I might not be an actual bigot (I hope) but I am a hypocrite.

It seems like an odd thing to say, but Dani’s lyrics are often romantic, even beautiful. Even when he’s singing about serial killers!

I truly believe that Dani Filth is an astoundingly good lyricist. A true master at what he does.

That was the first Macc Lads album I ever heard. I was 12 and I have been listening to them ever since. They’re brilliant for singalongs on long car journeys. I actually had their entire discography, including all of the demo/ep cassettes, such as Bog & Roll Circus, but I lent them to someone and never saw them again. I got to see the Macc Lads only once, in 1995. Too much snot for my liking. I was going to mention Stephen Lynch, too (Kevin Bloody Wilson and Rodney Carrington also). For some reason I can tolerate almost anything if you dress it up with some clever lyrics and put it to music.

I had taken a break from BassChat starting sometime in 2017, but I started lurking a few weeks ago. I was sent a message by Lurksalot asking me to pop in as a couple of people were asking after me. To be honest this really surprised me. I can’t remember exactly why I left, but I think it was because I felt that I was being too miserable and not really contributing as a bass player. The one person I was really sad to see no longer here was iCastle. However, there have been mentions of several people in this thread whose presence I enjoyed (I am just really, really bad at remembering names, so didn’t know to miss them, if you see what I mean). I am not sure coming back right now (considering the reason I left) is such a good idea. Christmas has done a proper number on me (it always does, but this year seems particularly difficult for some reason), and we’re also in the middle of moving house, which I am finding incredibly stressful. We’ll see how it goes. One good thing about the house move is that I am getting a much larger hobby room, part of which I want to turn into a miniature home recording studio. So I may well have to start asking here for advice.

The best time to plant a tree is thirty years ago. The second best time is now.

[quote name='EliasMooseblaster' timestamp='1508499081' post='3392595'] Gordon Bennett! At least it might make a good backup if your boiler's struggling this winter! [/quote] It's just one of those gun shaped ones with a trigger. Back in the early nineties, I briefly worked at a place repairing mobile phones. Mobile phones back then weren't quite as small and delicate as they are now, but they were still pretty delicate. The soldering iron we used looked just like any other soldering iron, but it was 120W and, apparently, cost the owner several hundred quid.

[quote name='SpondonBassed' timestamp='1508424044' post='3392109'] That's because the additional metal from your new solder absorbs heat and then that extra heat is transferred to the joint almost instantly through conduction through the larger contact area that is made by the softened metal. [/quote] I know how and why it works, but if you don't know about it, it seems counterintuitive. I have had the same Antex 18W soldering iron for thirty years and I have only ever used either a 3mm bit or a 1mm bit, depending on the job. I have never come across a joint it couldn't work with. I have actually got a 100W soldering iron, somewhere, but I have never even plugged it in.

I've been using an 18W soldering iron for thirty years and never had a problem. As has been said, melting some fresh solder onto the iron bit can help, but what I always find helps with stubborn, old joints, is melting fresh solder right onto the old solder. I know it might seem odd, adding solder to an area where you want to remove it, but it has always worked everytime for me.

[quote name='NancyJohnson' timestamp='1507577642' post='3386519'] Rhythm deaf? Like Adam Clayton? *Now, now, before you go shooting off, I'm being sarcastic. It was in fact Mr Bono who said, 'Adam can't even clap in time,' and I just have a tendency to agree with him. [/quote] Perhaps he's just reluctant because Bono has told him that everytime he does it, a kid in Africa dies?

I have been KingBollock since about 1997. I first used it on a chat program called Palace, and also IRC, and everyone used nicknames. And, to be frank, I hate my real name (which isn't Frank). I once stumbled across a website that had done some sort of competition to find the best nick names on the internet. I had come third. Which was quite cool, though it would have been cooler if they'd told me at the time. I should probably give in to the universe and go by the name David. Everytime I appeared in the local newspaper when I was a kid (for doing good things, like helping to build a soundproof rehearsal studio at the youth club), they always called me David. Once, they printed a photo which had me sitting next to my brother, whose name was David. The blurb under the picture pointed out that we were brothers and also gave our surnames, and still labelled us both as David. And I once got a private message from a BassChatter who didn't know my name but had a guess at... David.

[quote name='KiOgon' timestamp='1504768564' post='3367106'] He's a git, wind him up - get back to him and offer £125 - if he bites make the arrangements but don't turn up play him at his own game [/quote] Instead of just not turning up, actually send a message that says "Sorry, I found one for £55 so I am going to have to go with that. Unless you can match it?".

[quote name='police squad' timestamp='1502780260' post='3353389'] I was hit by a pineapple at the Reading festival 1983. Right in the face, during Big Country [/quote] That must have been a welcome distraction.