Jean-Luc Pickguard

Yes - it sounds like something that'll get you on some kind of list at the police station

Snap your fingers - ZZ Hill

Get Back In Line - The Kinks

I'm Walking Behind You - Sam Cooke

I'm afraid I don't understand the phrase "male grooming routine"

Lettuce Love - Bill Withers

Diamonds and Gold - Tom Waits

(Alternate Title) Randy Scouse Git - The Monkees

This one from thomann is huge, so its probably not a good choice: https://www.thomann.de/gb/thomann_gigbag1_bass_heavy.htm Apart from the inconveniently oversized thomann one I also have a discontinued ritter one I bought many years ago which is perfect, so one of the ones in their current range would probably be a good choice.

But are aluminum pickguards better for metal?

Subterranean Homesick Blues - Bob Dylan

Three of a Perfect Pear - King Crimson

Rather than list what's wrong about this bass, its easier to list what's right about it. A list of everything that confirms this bass as being a 2007 USA Fender:

The decals say 'Made in USA' on both the front and the back of the headstock so it must be true. 🤣

yes

Although I usually wear them for practice or rehearsals, I can get away with not wearing my specs when playing gigs as long as I've printed out a large print version of the set list.

Absolute Bee-ginners - David Bowie

Wot? - Captain Sensible

Interstellar Overdrive - Pink Floyd

Are You Sure Hank Done it This Way? - Waylon Jennings

Ain't Nobody Here But Us Chickens - Louis Jordan

Diamond Dogs - David Bowie

Davy's on The Road Again - Manfred Mann's Earth Band

The Lung Ones - Cliff Pilchard

In a previous band I had the responsibility for setting up the PA. Once everyone was set up we used to run through Steely Dan's 'Do it again' as I could play a simplified version of the bass line mostly one-handed allowing me to fiddle with the mixer at the same time. What does your band play at soundcheck? Do you play the whole song or just one verse/chorus to check the sound is okay?