uk_lefty

My guitarist mate had something similar. "Funky guitarist wanted" did not mean "can you play a few chic riffs?" In the case of the ad he replied to it seemed to mean "can you play the most complex chord sequences based off telepathic signals from other people on the room without so much as a clue in advance?"

Every now and then I do end up with just bass and amp. It's usually when using a provided backline, either cables are too short because they expect the bass player to be so far back you may as well be sat behind the stage, whereas I'm up with the singer doing backing vocals, or I've had pedals either fail or ram a load of unwanted noise through the amp which rather than try to resolve I just ditch the pedals. I like the security of having my tuner (for obvious reasons) pedal and my hartke vxl as a minimum, all the others are nice to have but not at all essential. The vxl is there as either a backup in case the amp fails so i can go direct from that pedal, or for the EQ if I don't know the amp. If I'm using my own amp then it's used as a boost pedal or to put drive at the front end of the pedal chain.

I may have been someone else's audition "hell". In the days before mobiles and internets my local music shop had an incredibly polite "bassist wanted" ad stating a wide range of influences and "we will be sure to play something you'll like". At this point in time I was seventeen, had a Tanglewood p bass copy and really crappy 15w practice amp. I had some tentative attempts to play with guitarist friends that never really got going, not a whole song, but I answered the ad and got invited to a guys house. I made an excuse about my amp being repaired and he says it's fine he's got one I can use. I arrive at the house and there is a room of amazing guitars, priceless some of them. There's a huge 80's Peavey bass amp for me to use. For some reason I chose to wear a reproduction 1970's Man Utd shirt (no idea). The guitarist has a Marshall stack. The guitarist/ singer is 20 and is a bit posh. The drummer is a big unit and very friendly. I hand over a list of songs i can play. There's some Hendrix on there so he says good, let's do "hey Joe". There began the most professional, unreal quality rendition of hey Joe I'd ever heard and somehow I was playing along with it! The guitarist improvised and sounded like Hendrix, the drummer was playing crazy but tasteful fills all over the place. I was so shy I turned my back on them a lot to concentrate. They were amazing. Terrible singing but everything else made up for it. Somehow I was "in". Turns out they had a great friend who was their bassist for a while but wasn't at all musical so he literally played an E as close to in time as he could for all the songs in E! So I was a small step up! There began my first ever band. Playing with such great players taught me so much and I'm forever grateful to them. But God knows what they said about me after that first audition!!

After some false starts in Hertfordshire I found an ad for a country-rock style band. I contacted the guy who was the singer and songwriter writer. He tells me he has recorded albums in Nashville and does hundreds of gigs. We agree a time and place for me to meet up and play with his band. Then I eventually got links to YouTube videos.... The videos were badly shot, badly lit, videos of an old (nothing against that per se) man sat in his garden strumming a guitar. The recorded singing playing over this was utterly dreadful. My face dropped. My wife absolutely pee'd herself laughing. "It's like Kermit the frog!!!" She roars, now crying with laughter. There are a handful of these videos, each more painful than the last. I hadn't played in a band for a few years and was itching to go. "You just can't do this to yourself" my wife said, saying what I was already thinking. I made my excuses far in advance of meeting by emailing something about reforming my old band. I then get an email obviously meant for the rest of the band slamming me and my attitude saying I had "cried off". I replied stating that he probably meant this mail for other people but I will manage to hold back the tears.

The year was 2007. The place... A farking long way from Southampton, where I had moved, naively. I responded to an ad asking for a bassist to play in a funky pop band with two awesome female singers. One of the singers had a pub that was closed on Sunday evenings (last time I saw this pub since those days it was boarded up) so we could rehearse there. I went to the audition armed with my Warwick bass and having learned some songs the guitarist sent me. Guitarist was in charge. Well, it wasn't funky pop more 80's power ballad, Heart's "how do I get you alone" sounded amazing. Excellent, I think. Anyhow first audition I'm the only bassist, they like my gear and that I have learned the songs so I'm in after the first song. Endless guitarists are arriving and ejected, none can hold a candle to the band leader who in fairness was good. Some guy about forty turns up with his Yamaha Pacifica beginners set from Argos and recognises he is not up to scratch and leaves very quickly. An excellent guitarist is a bit too good for the band leaders liking so he unfortunately gets his marching orders. The singers are good, the drummer wants to play System of a Down so he's gone. It's me, the singers and the band leader. Next week, new drummer. He's actually deaf. You have to shout to him. I feel sorry for any drummer though because one of the singers is married to a guy who's job is to play drums. In the army. And he's there all the time. Now he's a nice bloke and he never said a bad word to anyone, but his constant presence unnerves every single drummer. But we think that the deaf guy is ok so we keep him. We get a second guitarist. He's good and a nice down to earth guy. Keyboards. I will never play in a band with keyboards. Long haired Rik Wakeman wannabe brings a whole Glastonbury of kit. Moans about festivals not providing some weird power box thing I've never heard of. Sets up staircases worth of key boards. Starting late we go for some songs. Not only has he not learned them he has never ever heard them. This becomes a game of "name the pop song" until he recognises one. "Stereophonics? Welsh band? Not heard them, no." Band leader asks him to learn three songs for next week. I forgot to mention. Despite the girls being amazing with the 80's power ballads we have somehow become a Stereophonics tribute act by stealth,because the band leader knows all their songs so he doesn't have to learn anything. I begrudgingly go along with it but say to get bookings we need a theme and 80's power ballads with these great singers will be dynamite. I'm not listened to. Keyboard player turns up, hasn't learned anything. I'm told pack up and when he's gone get all your kit back out. I pack up and then say f this it's getting late I'm off home. Keyboard player has been told he's out and he's upset. I've nearly driven the half hour home when my phone rings "I know you've not got them but can you check all your gear, keyboard player has lost his car keys". I check and I haven't got them. He's been there an hour after getting his marching orders but can't find his car keys anywhere. Just over an hour passes with the whole pub turned upside down and he finds his keys. In his pocket. Band continues, more Stereophonics, less listening to me, 2nd guitar and drummer. Messages replying to my song suggestions become borderline abusive. I get fired just as I was about to quit. So did the drummer and second guitar. We form a band ourselves, drummer and guitarist don't learn any of the songs, we never even arrange a second rehearsal. What a waste of time.

100%!!!! My favourite was still the girl who had never been in a band but her boyfriend said she was "quite good". When I made my excuses that I was trying to get in to an international sport squad at under 21 level (true story) her reply was a disgusted "what? You'd rather do that than be in a band with ME?"

It's usually me pushing the cheesey 80's anthems! And there are some nice bass parts in a lot of them, depends what you want the band to do I guess. The cheesy 80's anthems suit our core audience perfectly

Similar to Elias... I started on bass but two years later got an acoustic guitar to help with song writing. I am often conflicted though, while an appreciation of other instruments will make me a better musician overall, I often think it's time that could be invested in being better at my main instrument, the bass.

I've got the arm chair to match your two seater sofa. Not sure what you'll do with that info.... But, nice, aren't they?

I've seen Red Hot Chilli Peppers do that!

But the Japanese ones, when they come up, sell for excellent value second hand.

Try that but with traditional Polish folk music.... For a rock covers band

Just bought an EHX Bass Balls. Very easy to arrange meeting up and exchanging money for goods, a polite and thoroughly decent chap. Thank you!

It's doing nothing for me. And a glance at my cd collection tells you I'll buy almost anything.

I would have loved one of them but couldn't justify the cost. Suppose if I think the cheapo Chinese one I'm using now is worth it I might upgrade to the boss in future.

I bought a cheap Harmonizer off eBay (Tomsline, also goes under the Aroma brand and some other names) and hated it. I had assumed it could thicken up the bass tone subtly with a fifth or whatever and cover some.more sonic ground but a lot of the settings are rubbish, frankly. My guitarist is going to take it on and have a go... But then I put it back on my board and used it in detune mode set to add a fifth, then in to a flanger and wow! The breakdown in magic carpet ride has become rightfully psychedelic! So who else uses Harmonizers and how do you get the best out of them?

Got to be honest I use the neck pickup cover on my jazz to cover the butchering of the scratch plate to fit a new pickup. That looked cool and provided a bit of a rest for my hand and I was mainly anchoring my thumb on the bridge pickup. However, always liked the look so I fitted a bridge pickup cover. It was awkward at first and I still would prefer having at least one pickup uncovered sometimes but it just looks brilliant, don't think my band would let me change. I won't put them on my p bass though. I don't want to drill in to my lovely MIJ precision, and for that bass I really do need the pickup open and accessible to play directly over. It also has the badass bridge off my jazz on it now so a bridge cover wouldn't fit at all.

I have both on my j bass, but none on my p bass. Is that relevant?

Sold John a pedal, very quick and easy to arrange and receive payment. He confirmed delivery for me too which is good

In a former band the biggest annoyance was the guitarist insisting on also being the singer. He was an unbelievable guitarist, but he knew it, and didn't know that he was a terrible singer. The music overrode the poor quality vocal but that band would have been immense with a proper singer.

Had the same discussion ourselves recently!!! If you can't remember stuff like the key then you write it on your setlist with a marker. It comes across to me really amatuer, ruins the flow of the gig and must also spoil it for the audience too!

So... Not much more to report. Still unable to download the full version of Ableton. While Fender have answered my emails quickly "it should be available in a couple of weeks" isn't very precise! But I bought secondhand so I can't be too pushy. I have not yet used this with the band, we need to book a rehearsal room that has subs on the PA otherwise 40watts just won't cut it, so will update more on that later. I have mainly played with the amp models and I find them far better than any I've used before, for home use at least. I've not yet programmed any settings as I haven't had time but I will do soon.

Not the same value of gear but I recently had similar guilt over my amount of music stuff that rarely got its proper use. Don't get me wrong, I play in a band I enjoy that makes me a few quid on the side, but I never get time to practice at home, and definitely don't get time to practice other music or play around with settings on pedals. I recently moved on a cab, some pedals and a bass I wanted to love but couldn't get on with the string spacing. Losing the bass was sensible, but I really lost out on the cab and should have just stuck it in the loft, especially as I really could have done with it at the next gig I played after selling it! I would ask myself: Do you have gear you like to practice with for the rare opportunity? Would you lose too much selling now? If you could join a band today what realistically do you need out of what you already own?