Dan Dare

I went to the Reading Festival some years ago. Was very disappointed to find there were no books. Mis-representation, I call it.

So he has form?

I'm off to the golf course for a couple of hours before it gets dark.

Send us a postcard

And tea on mine

Well, we've tried to explain it to you, but you won't have it. We understand that rejection can be hurtful. You've been turned down by a band and you're not happy about it. However, you will do yourself no favours if you continue to insist that the problem lies with others and not with you. You went to an audition, had an argument with the other musicians, tried to impose your way of doing things on them and they turned you down. No surprises there. You need to be able to get on with your band mates. Anyone who looks like being trouble is not even going to get the gig in the first place. So you post on here and complain how unfair it is, claim that you're some kind of musical genius and slag off other bass players? I think I can safely say that none of us would hire you, based on what you have said today, even if you were as good as you claim, because you would be difficult to get along with personally. Based on the sample of your playing that you provided, I would be wary about claiming you are an "advanced" player. I don't expect you will listen to any of this. Your pride will not allow you to consider the fact that you have shortcomings, personally or as a player. It's rather sad.

The Shure Beta 57 is regarded as better than the 58 for female voices. I "discovered" a nice inexpensive vocal mic for female voices by accident a few years ago, which is an EV ND 367s. It isn't the best choice for those soul/blues belter female voices - you can overload it - but it's great for the type of voice you describe. You don't need to work it super close, either and it's a dynamic, which is handy in situations where there isn't phantom power.

"Weak, smiling and slow bassists", huh? Well, you've forced my hand. A couple of people have alluded to what I'm about to say, but I'll give it to you straight. You uploaded a sample of your playing earlier. Being brutally honest, it consisted mainly of medium tempo, simple pentatonic clichés with occasionally slightly iffy timing. You may be the best or only bass player in your town, but you appear to have an unrealistic estimation of your abilities. Sorry to burst your bubble.

Brilliant. That bassist must be roasting in that cossie. Like all good parodies, the playing is spot on. Great stuff.

Yep. It seems to me that many who play fretless regard themselves as somehow superior to us lowly mortals who rely on frets. Perhaps they are drawn to fretless because they see it as a way to demonstrate their expertise. Hence the over-playing, superfluous frills and clever stuff. As it happens, I play fretless as well. I've played the violin for almost 60 years, so am used to not having those little bits of brass to keep me in tune. However, I rarely use it. It only comes out when it might be appropriate.

If it is what the music calls for, it is precisely that. Being a musician is all about making the right choices - what to play, when to play it, how much or little to play and so on. All the technique in the world does not make anyone a good musician and especially not a good band player. A band is a team, or should be. The whole should be greater than the sum of its parts. If you view a band purely as a vehicle to enable you indulge yourself, you are unlikely to fit in well.

On the contrary, it's the worst time to "show your skills" Playing in a band is as much about personal skills as it is about being able to play well. By all means demonstrate that you are competent, but if you show off or start telling the other musicians what to do when you don't even know them, be prepared for a rejection.

Nowt "sad" about it and it applies to pretty well any instrument. Being in a band is about being a team player and complementing what everyone else is doing. That's what gives me most satisfaction about playing the bass.

Amen to that, especially the last part. Again, spot on. "Explosive" playing can be another word for drawing attention to oneself/showing off, or being too busy, or even trying to force a way of doing things on the rest of the band. None of these are qualities that will get you a gig unless the band happens to be in sympathy with your approach. A lot of bands don't want a "genius" on the bass, with good reason. They want someone who does the job and fulfils the role. Yes, people like Jaco P are brilliant, push the boundaries, extend what was considered possible for the instrument, etc. But would you want them in your band, drawing focus away from everyone else and even working against what the band is trying to achieve? If Jaco could be reincarnated and turned up for an audition with your band, would you hire him? I wouldn't, although I would happily acknowledge his brilliance. Geniuses are often best admired from afar.

And that right there could be the issue. If you attend an audition and tell the band "This is the way I do it and I don't care what you want", you're unlikely to get the gig. They will probably not tell you bluntly that they don't like your attitude and that they want someone who is willing to be more flexible and fit in with the rest of the band. They are more likely to be diplomatic and say something along the lines of "We're not looking for a fretless/fretted player" or similar.

Rat fur was originally a carpet material developed for the auto industry (the original product name was Ozite). Ozite itself was hardwearing and durable and would clean up well. It is often attached to cabs with tough 2 part adhesive, making it difficult to remove. Many cab manufacturers used cheaper copies of it, which is not such good news. Really cheap versions did not have a vinyl backing beneath the fur. They can be a real nightmare to remove and leave bits of fur and glue all over the cab, so cleaning/refurbing rather than replacement is sensible unless you have endless patience. Your plan - hoover after brushing (I'd try a stiffish carpet brush), then use the sticky side of some gaffa tape like a lint roller to get more stubborn dirt/dust out of it - sounds a good way to go. You can use even wet carpet cleaner and a scrubbing brush on decent quality rat fur once you have removed the surface dirt, but obviously it would be sensible to remove drive units, wiring etc first and allow to dry thoroughly before re-assembling. You have little option other than to shave pilled areas. With luck, it won't leave them looking too threadbare unless the pilling is really severe. Have fun.

Apparently, if you pick up a seashell on the beach these days and hold it to your ear, you can hear the sound of a toilet flushing.

There are a couple of decent looking Peavey 1x15 combos on eBay at the moment (including a TKO 115) for not a lot of money if you fancy a trip down memory lane. I agree with Lozz's suggestion to look at Ashdown. Decent and reliable if the weight is not an issue.

PJB are my speakers of choice, too, for electric as well as DB (and my fiddle, for which they work nicely - no tweeters to accentuate the harsh high frequencies that you can get when using a bow). I have five of his 5x4 cabs and use as many as the occasion demands. They're also great when you want that foam-under-the-strings P bass thump.

There is plenty of decent kit that will do what you want. Suggestions above are all good. I won't muddy the waters by recommending what I use. It's decent, but no better than what others suggest. Why not pay a visit to somewhere like Bass Direct and play with some stuff? Go on a quiet weekday and you can try things to your heart's content. That's what i did the last time I upgraded my gear. I'd just say that, whatever you go for, make sure it's modular - such as the Mark Bass 121 plus cab you mention - so you can take out as much or as little as you need for the job. Avoid big, cumbersome boxes and you should be fine.

I'd say it's more a case of realising, when you reach "a certain age" and become more musically knowledgeable, that what you fondly and naively imagined to be "creativity" was nothing of the sort.

Vintage instruments, like vintage cameras, cars, etc, etc will always be in demand and not just by musicians. An enormous number of them are owned purely as investments by people who can hardly play, if at all. For every Joe Bonamassa (who is a real player as well as a well-known collector), there are hundreds of architects, bankers and wealthy weekend warriors who have money to burn and who are looking for something to invest it in. Their instruments are usually kept in secure storage and rarely used for their intended purpose. As long as musical instruments are seen as investments, that situation will continue and prices will be likely to hold up.

"Misogynistic and homophobic language removed"? I remember my first pint, too.

I like the cut of your jib. OP says "no one PLAYS any more"??? Funny, but I hear plenty of people every day who do just that. Perhaps I'm dreaming. Maybe he saw playing music as a means to an end - money, fame, recreational pharmaceuticals, loose women, fast cars and the like. If only. As you so rightly say, do it for its own sake and enjoy it and treat any success is a bonus.

I have a TC Helicon VoiceSolo, which works very well. Clips onto the mic stand, so you can have it pointing directly at and close to you. Tannoy speaker, clean sound, nice reverb/eq settings and you can still send a dry signal to the PA when you use them in the monitor.