skankdelvar

Perhaps another reason why the marketplace seems slow is that a proportion of sellers (usually newbs but not always) fail to maximise their chances. Even now, people still put up an expensive instrument supported only by a couple of lines of waffly boilerplate and a single photo. So: * Before doing anything else, check out the 'Wanted' sub-forum. There may be someone who wants what you've got. Bingo! You didn't even have to post an ad. * When writing the ad please avoid cliches such as: 'Never thought I'd sell this' or 'Plays like buttah'. That's basically the same as 'Drives Superb, FTSWB' and frankly it sucks * I don't care if the bass has 'never been gigged' but I suppose some people might. Describe all faults accurately and honestly to avoid post-sale unpleasantness * If you don't want trades and you don't want low-ball offers just say so in bold text. Threats of physical violence towards time-wasters should be avoided * Me, I don't give a toss about 'smoke-free, pet-free homes' but some people do. If your bass is uncontaminated, say so. * Try to sound like a human being. Don't just write 'Here we have a ...' then paste specs off the manufacturer's web site. This isn't f**king Gumtree * If you've got the means to do do, measure the action at the 12th fret in mm. Most people won't know the difference but it makes you look like you know what you're talking about * Weigh the bass and post the result in lbs and kilos - it matters to some people and you don't need special kit. Just get on the bathroom scales, see how much you weigh, then do it again with the bass hung round your neck and note the difference. If you haven't got bathroom scales, buy some and tell the wife it's a Christmas present because she's looking a bit lardy * The more photos the better. Please don't ask people to request more photos by email - just post them in the ad for ffs * Don't post an ad that includes the words 'Photos coming soon'. You've just wasted my time and I won't come back because I'm a vindictive bastard like that. * If posting lots of close-up photos include at least one shot of the whole bass, preferably in landscape rather than portrait so we don't crick our necks looking at the screen sideways * Include a location preferably at town or city level. No one's going to burgle you based solely on the knowledge that you live in Greater Manchester * If you want to get the best possible price, be prepared to wait a few months * If you want a quick sale then get yourself noticed: research the going rate and offer the item at 5% less (then move more slowly on further discounts) * Don't pad your price up to allow for future discounts. That just makes you look expensive. Offer the going rate and just be firmer about holding your price * Don't post a price then drop it within 48 hours. It makes you look desperate. Not everyone comes here everyday so it'll take a week or two for most of the potential buyers to spot your item * Bump as often as you can within the forum rules. Once a week doesn't cut it. If someone comments on your ad there's no rule against responding to them or starting a conversation, afaik * If you're prepared to ship, say so. If you won't ship, say so. In bold letters. It will reduce the number of people asking if you'll ship. OTOH, people asking if you'll ship is a first stage in hooking them. Difficult one... * If a French dude asks you three times if you'll ship overseas and won't take no for an answer and bangs on about his 'standing' you have my permission to tell him to go f**k himself * If you're going to ship make people feel confident: offer to ship in a hard case inside a box or stipulate how you'll pack (box inside a box, packing peanuts / bubble wrap, etc) * If you won't ship then expect the sale to take longer * If you won't ship then offer a local (50 mile radius?) free delivery service or offer to meet halfway (within reason) for petrol at the going rate per mile * Don't get offended if someone low balls you. Smile sweetly, flip it back on them and ask them what their best price is. The only time to tell them to f**k off is if they get rude * If you sell the bass and the new owner flips it within a week for more than he paid you for it, don't come here complaining about it like a pissy b!tch. Find another way to take your revenge. Chaps - Please feel free to add any further suggestions

He is missed in many respects.

Generally speaking, this topic comes up about once every 12 months or so. Among reasons previously advanced are: * Increasing / Declining £ to $ exchange rate * Austerity (of the 'simply crippling' variety) * Introduction of ad placement fee by egregiously greedy forum owners Ped and Kiwi * Advancing age of members leading to 'autumn of life' clear outs thence to market saturation * Ubiquity of 'boring' Fender P's and J's * Frankly ludicrous cost of bespoke luthier basses * Unrealistically high prices and seller inflexibility * Unrealistic and frankly disrespectful low ball offers * Lack of patience * Other stuff

Having now listened to pretty much everything they're released, my problem with Greta Van Fleet is that the execution is flawed and the material is drab. When they're totally trying to cop Zep they lack the energy and bite, and when they're trying to do their own thing they haven't got the riffs. There's nothing wrong with working in an obsolete genre but they're simply not bringing anything - er - new to the party. Unless their next album manages the almost impossible task of being period-perfect while adding to the canon I suspect that will probably be it for them. Anyway, they'll sell some records and they're touring and they seem like nice enough people so in the end who really gives a toss.

1. 70'S HARD ROCK/EARLY METAL COVER BAND SEEKS BASS Being as I am currently jonesing for early 70's obscure hard rock with song titles like 'Woman Tamer' or 'Iron Gates of Hell' I'd look at this as a side project which I could twist to my nefarious ends. Doubtful if there's any money in it either way. 2. BAND SEEKING BASS PLAYER Annoyingly peppy ad yet strangely authoritarian at the same time. Probably a bunch of hand wringing snowflakes who want to be able to tell their friends they're in a band then they all go off and have quinoa enemas together. 3. BASSIST NEEDED FOR ORIGINAL BAND They shouldn't have a name unless they're already gigging. If they're already gigging it's a useless name. Influences: goth, punk, metal, grunge and other? Recipe for mission creep, there. Anyway there's no money in goth punk metal grunge originals in Milwaukee. Or probably anywhere else on the planet apart from maybe Saudi Arabia where there's a big market for that stuff, no, really, there is, why would I be lying, just to get some goth punk metal grunge guys locked up by the Saudi religious police and beaten with canes? 4. SINGING BASSIST FOR POWER TRIO "Blah blah blah good songs blah blah". 'Good' is a matter of taste which means that everyone will be stood around saying 'But me and Dawson think it's a good song and we think you're being toadally unreasonable saying it's a 5hit song and we should drop it, particularly as we're still playing that Bob Seger song Katmandu that you think is good but me and Dawson think is 5hit'.

Not quite solo artists but Annie Lennox and Dave Stewart did better for themselves after they left The Tourists, ditto Paul Young after the Q-Tips.

Up to a point, Lord Copper.

You don't want BC luminary and supermod @wateroftyne hearing you say that. He's got a picture of the talented and lovely Kathryn Tickell tattooed on his chest.

Not necessarily. I can see how it could happen. Someone says: 'Oh, sad. Must use uilleann pipes, obvs, think Titanic' and someone else says: 'But uilleann pipes are Irish not Scottish' and the first someone says: 'Well we could always use bagpipes' and there's a bit of a pause and the second someone says: 'I know this chap who's quite good and we can probably get him cheap' and then mission creep sets in, you've got a jaunty ceilidh number on your hands and then everyone gets sued by the estate of the late Mr Jimmy Shand for plagiarism.

Notwithstanding the Edinburgh locale I would - speaking only for myself - avoid the use of bagpipes to any significant degree.

For some years I gigged my old Marshall JMP Mk 2 1987 as a bass head. Though not particularly spellbinding it sounded OK, possibly because it had loads of (fairly) clean headroom. It was also bastard loud even for a 50 watter.

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You're very welcome. Also, doing one-step journeys means you can get three or four songs songs out of your greater 'journey'. Then - if you like - you can join them up with some short instrumental interludes and - Hey Presto! - you got yourself a mini rock opera. Ker-ching! Slightly unbelievably, some of the best lyric writers operate in the Country genre. Example: I can hardly bear the sight of lipstick On the cigarettes there in the ashtray Lyin' cold the way you left them But at least your lips caressed them while you packed And a lip print on a half-filled cup of coffee that you poured and didn't drink But at least you thought you wanted it, that's so much more than I can say for me A Good Year For The Roses - Writer: Jerry Chesnut / Performer: George Jones

Fine as confessional poetry but not so much as a song lyric. It's not that it's particularly 'deep' but the lengthy process of going through rejection, moving on, growing, optimism and being cherished places too many demands on the casual listener - unless the purpose of writing those lyrics is simply to help you put a frame around things that have happened to you, which is a perfectly admirable reason for writing things down. If you're writing songs for other people to listen to, you might be better off choosing two consecutive points in your journey ( [Rejection > moving on] or [growing > optimism] or [optimism > being cherished] or even [being cherished > rejection]) and writing a song about that shorter journey. Try to do the whole process in one go and you're in for five or six verses of reflective stuff and dense, poetic words which is fine if one is Leonard Cohen, not so much if one is not. So: why not write about a simpler, shorter journey and maybe take the personal edge off it by writing it in the second or third person. Oh, and get the hook into the song within 28 secs or it'll never get past a radio playlist committee

After a quick google search it seems there aren't many books solely about lyric writing but there are scrillions about general songwriting which have sections on writing lyrics. And it doesn't necessarily need to cost a fortune to get hold of some of them. I just searched my County libraries website for songwriting and it pulled up three or four of the books that get a good rating on Amazon, also the book 'Writing better lyrics : the essential guide to powerful songwriting' by Pat Pattison which seems to be one of the few recently published lyric-specific books out there. So try the library. Frankly, I'd dive into a few of those books, compare / contrast, make some notes then start writing. The more you write the better you'll get. I don't know about anyone else but my approach is usually (but not always): decide on genre > think about a 'situation' > come up with a lyrical hook > find a comfortable rhythm and tempo that fits under the line > structure a chorus > write the verses > write a bridge (if necessary) > kick it around in a basic form for while > structure an arrangement > record demo > take to band > encounter utter indifference > rinse and repeat.

^ I am very much enjoying your posts ^ Nice work, Sir

Indeed so. My cousin Lara married a Canadian guy who was over here playing Pro Ice Hockey. Big as a house. Met the rest of his family at the wedding and they were even bigger. One of his brothers was about 6'10, no kidding. All really lovely people and a total hoot. It's a bit like that Spitting Image South Africa song, but different: 'I've only ever met nice Canadians'.

I managed 26 years (1981-2007) and burned out in a welter of savage recriminations and erratic behaviour. Perhaps this was because the population of London grew by about 28% during that time but the infrastructure didn't.

Perhaps it was because you worked on a farm with access to a quad and a tractor that you did not need the 4WD capability of your 4x4

Cheers, don't mind if I do.

My objection is the slightly bizarre sub-head: Discover A World Of Famous Fun. I don't think I've ever before seen the adjective 'famous' applied to the noun 'fun'. It's like the ad was written either by an AI or a f**king moron.

Just checked and it failed. This is a good thing because it gives me another compelling justification not to go up to London when the Missus starts banging on about art galleries and Peter Jones in Sloane Square. Thank you, Sadiq Khan, Mayor of London - you may have f**ked up tens of thousands of people but you have immeasurably enrichened my life.

Direct, chunky, nice twist on the chorus harmony vocals - I like that a lot. More so than the Woolley version which made me feel slightly seasick, dunno why, maybe it was the bassline or the arrangement

Produced by Jeff Wayne, as was Rock On.

He kept them on in bed?