Leonard Smalls

Looks like your lyrics are sorted! Stick something funky and zoomy under that, with just a hint of dogs barking and Tom's yer uncle!

[quote name='Rikki1984' timestamp='1459635563' post='3018328'] If it's any use to you the video is just of 2 people snowboarding down a mountain. [/quote] Aye, it's just of 2 French women snowboarding down a mountain. With ice-axes... It's waaay rad, dude! Or in French "C'est super cool!"

You'd never have got anywhere near any of the ladies if Jono had been Belle!

Jono wouldn't have approved of that... He only likes Bach. And when in lighter mood, Offenbach. Though he did have a soft spot for Iggy's "I I wanna be your dog"and of course, George Clinton's "Atomic Dog",though he worried about nuclear war.

[quote name='Skol303' timestamp='1459511790' post='3017262'] Here you go. This is apparently the [i]actual[/i] photo of Mornats handing the Supercharger plug-in over to Mr Smalls (obtained via Reuters news agency). Good to see they both made the effort and scrubbed up for the occasion, eh! [/quote] Fixt!

I don't know how to embed the Facebook vid without getting into html, but the theme of this month is crazy dogs (my sadly departed ex-mutt, Jono), snow (some in the lane above my house 3 years ago this week!), and crazy French girls, also in the snow... I can envisage "woohoo" Blur type stuff, sad songs about the death of a dog, free jazz epics celebrating the randomness of snow drifts, struttin' disco grooves about "having a good time, all the time" (copyright Spinal Tap!), or acoustic ballads about being scared stupid!

Lawks! A song about a serial gufmeister wins! I'd like to thank my public, and my ma and pa, and ([i]d[/i][i]rones on emotionally for 4 hours)[/i] [i]​[/i]

Our band are playing our first ever outdoor festival this year, though we played (indoors) as part of Sheffield Tramlines fest last year. We're way down the bill, but at least we're above the Bouncy Castle! (we're the Badass Weeds, btw) http://www.greenmeadowsfestival.org/line-up-3/

S'funny that spell check changes "improv" to "improve"! It's obviously bourgeois reactionary software designed to oppress the working man by stifling his creativity (in a non-sexist way wot with referring to me, and me being a bloke and not a 15 year old girl from Wisconsin, honest!)

Cheers Douglas! As you rightly say, much more thought went into the lyrics than the music; I'd been listening to "Gimmix" by John Cooper Clarke on orange, plectrum shaped vinyl! Excellent write up, as ever, and I'm pleased you like it. Obviously I'll have to return to tuneless free improve next month...

Luddite! That's proper science, that.

Chas and Dave... They were excellent - and a Wal was involved!

[quote name='Rikki1984' timestamp='1458600202' post='3009066'] was mortally embarrassed by the vocals. I haven't got time to rerecord but I've remixed them and have smothered them in effects in a desperate and vain attempt to cover up their obvious deficiencies. [/quote] I do that a lot! I find it works better with minimal melody, possibly sticking with more rhythmic and more tuneless vox - dare I say dialect rap? I also discovered that a further coat of glitter can be added by double tracking (or double recording) the vox with slightly different levels of delay and other fx on each. You can see how well all that works by my tasteful offering this month!

Our band works on the unanimous votes principal; if one member doesn't like a song, we don't do it.

[quote name='CamdenRob' timestamp='1458362541' post='3006953'] Like the little repeating melody on that... It's like a mini jazz tune, doing the melody then a little noodle then back to the melody again, full tune in a minute sounds damn growly as well... Great tone. [/quote] Cheers! That's the beauty of Wal... I felt that the £300 for a service and set-up was well-spent!!

Talking of themes, my theme this month is solo bass... https://soundcloud.com/leonard-smalls/flatricenoodle

I've finally finished mine... I'd advise anyone whose mental age is above 15, or is offended by sub-Carry-On humour, or is appalled by a 3rd rate John Cooper-Clarke/Frank Sidebottom tribute, to step away! But if you like the idea of a cautionary song about a chap whose only means of entertainment is based on excessive flatulence, give it a go! https://soundcloud.com/dredd-and-the-badass-weed/there-she-blows [spoiler]This song has got 2 simple drum loops, with additional twiddling done by me via EZ Drummer - the triangle and shaker are loops made by me, also from EZ. FX are stereo enhance, some eq and some reverb. I started, as usual with bass (Wal) recorded direct into Ableton via a Focusrite Scarlett, then played it in again with slightly different fills. Both are doubled up with different eqs on all, plus lots of compression, some chorus, mild tube overdrive and hard limiting. Keys are 2 Fender Rhodes, one with a minor third trigger sequence and wah, plus 2 Clavinovas with slightly different drive and eq, one is wah-ed. Flutes and guitars are edited from Loopmasters samples with clean funk amp and reverb on both. Vocals (sorry!) are recorded twice, given a (large) touch of NY glue compression, with short delay on each, and one has chorus and occasional wafts of "Robo-Voice"...[/spoiler]

Aye... All the stories end badly. I was brought up on them and Bechstein/Grimm - I've got a German mother!

Perhaps with all this serious, dangerous storm stuff I should defintely re-think my flatulence angle... And just as I'd made it into a cautionary tale [i]á la[/i] [url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Struwwelpeter"]Struwwelpeter![/url]

[quote name='Dad3353' timestamp='1457710845' post='3001224'] I'd pray for you but for being an atheist..! [/quote] Everybody knows that heaven is only for the atheists!

[quote name='Dad3353' timestamp='1457709462' post='3001204'] Dittons..? Yes, similar concept there. Any good for metal..? [/quote] They're very good for the harder of hearing at all audible frequencies (and beyond - 18Hz-30kHz!), they work as well for metal as jazz or classical. Mine, however, had the optional Folk-Filter fitted, so as soon as the words "I sawe a prettye mayde" or assocoiated fiddle-de-dees appear they shut down until re-activated using Brotzmann's Last Exit...

[quote name='Dad3353' timestamp='1457705484' post='3001153'] If they're Byfleet-made TL200's, [/quote] IIRC, Cambridge are now a Richer Sounds brand... Doesn't mean they're no good, just not as top-end as they used to be! But you'll be pleased to hear I'm still using some Ditton 66 speakers...

I've made a start... Just for a change it's funk, with fat wah-ed clavinet and even a short flute solo... My Mrs, however, thinks the lyrics are "juvenile, at best", so I'm debating whether to stick with my 15 year old's attempt at being John Cooper Clarke (I thought it was funny - but not sure how many would agree!) or to write new lyrics...

Shannon Jackson and Fuze being surprisingly funky! [MEDIA]http://youtu.be/sEvyfDQUpBU[/MEDIA]

Cheers Douglas; witty, insightful and excellent reviews, as ever!