Leonard Smalls

Oi! It's only me who's allowed to do that! As for saving the planet, I'll be taking my Sandberg which, being German isn't made of ordinary rainforest-killing bass wood, but of Ersatzholtz which is actually sculpted from recrystallised oil company executives.

Expansions - Lonnie Liston Smith

I'll be wearing some sort of shoes and pants on the train... As for making space on the train, if the trews don't do it the after effects of my baked beans, eggs and vinegar diet will. However, I'm in Blackpool for the entire 4 days of Rebellion, and as everybody knows, punk is just one bit fashion show which means new outfits at least every day. So that's the Sparklebutt silver spangly kecks with the biker boots, the zebra kecks and matching creepers, the snakeskin kecks with leopard print creepers, the Indian Project zips'n'pockets comfy strides (3 pairs in different colours) with co-ordinated 5-10 approach boots and offensive t-shirts to match. I feel I may have to bring a servant/dresser as well.

No room for cucumbers or baguettes because of the armadillo in my trousers. It's really quite frightening!

Rock n roll shoes: Rock n roll trousers Helix Berghaus kit bag 😁

The bigger worry is my 100l Berghaus kit bag with wheels which will have my flightcased Helix and an exciting array of rock'n' roll shoes and trousers in it. It weighs a ton!

We're Choked.... Playing it Rebellion Sunday 10th at a nice and early 1350, and at fringe festival at the Washington same day at 2100.

I've decided to go to our gig at Rebellion in Blackpool on the train in order to personally save the planet etc... (rest of band all arriving on different days). As they're providing an AmpegSVT and 8x10 I only need to take bass, helix and an array of funky shoes and trees. However, luggage policy seems a little confused - anyone know if train travel is easily possible with bass in soft case? It says max size 1m!

First time y'all haven't done it for ages!

Had a rehearsal booked today. Message from drummer saying he's put his back out, then singer messages saying she's dribbling with cold... But we went ahead anyway - I got the album drum stems on the laptop, plugged it into the PA and we did a 2 basses and guitar rehearsal. And it was excellent! We've ironed out some of the niggles between the 2 basses, and new guitarman now has all structures, and can do the widdley bits with me and solos that fit over funky slap stuff. So extremely worthwhile - should now be fine for Rebellion with 3 more full band rehearsals and warm-up gig to go.

Turd Uncle - Bauhaus

Having got a new drummer (cheers Bob ex of Terminal Rage!) and guitarist we're finally ready for the first gig of the year! Then on 10th August it's our 1st ever 2 gigs-in-a-day! We're on at 2100 at this Rebellion fringe event: And before that, we're playing at Rebellion at 1350:

Colon Feel The Noize - Slade

Haven't heard that in a while! I remember buying it for 10p in Notting Hill Record and Tape Exchange (though it was on Goldhawk Road...)

Love in an elevator - Aerosmith

Bear Necessities - Jungle Book

I do this a lot at work! Though for me it's bags of compost; I often have to carry bags to customer's cars so it's 50m with a 50l bag in each hand. Finding a good grip on the plastic bag makes it into a grip strength double exercise. And the hardest of all is once a month we get 2 15kg bags of dog food delivered to work. I try every time to carry both to the car 200m away - so far I've not got past 120m without having to put 'em down!

Carry On Screaming - Boz Burrell

Just about to light a barbie, so I'll put some sausage and burger music on. Which, today, is:

Stutter Rap - Morris Minor and the Majors

I don't do owt specifically to be gig-fit... However, in order not to be completely broken when I reach my late 60s (not too long now!) - also having two herniated discs - I do a morning routine of exercises involving crunchies, press-ups, Pilates stuff, Yoga stuff, Mars Bars and a Flake plus squats, some weights etc. And about 5 times a week I walk up our local hill, which is about 1000' climb. And when I can be bothered I go out on the mountain bike, and go climbing and/or mountain walking. Bass wise, I do various hand and wrists stretches as part of my routine, as well as doing an hour or so practice every couple of days.

Shaft! - Isaac Hayes

Fire! - Sly and Robbie (and Ohio Players, of course!)

A punkyfunky thing based on a true story told by a lovely old man (Herr Wilhelm Lügner) in my local pub...

No more messing about with flobbly wet melodic bass nonsense!