Leonard Smalls

Bit of Headhunters.

Raincow Uriah Head Jethro Tall Player MegaHeath

Sudden death - Mr Bungle

My gig tonight didn't involve me playing at all... However, I brought my PA and did sound and lights for a charity gig for our local LegClub (don't laugh, you might need 'em one day) by ex Jethro Tull keys Dee Palmer and Labour peer Stewart Wood, with support by a local Dobro and Beefheart Enthusiast... And due to rain and tiny gazebo (twas outside), didn't even get gear out of car till 1730, punters due to arrive at 1800. So no chance to set any levels, and all key sounds being completely different volumes meant lots of speculative fader-riding (had to put mixer behind the stage!). However, all sounded excellent, loads of Tull songs done and crowd happy, plus nearly £1000 raised.

La Bouganvilla Strangiato - Rush

I remember many years ago a mate of mine had a posh but very right-on girlfriend. He was a proper midlander, but kind of skinny and not at all hard... And I lost count of the amount of times he'd get punched because she'd taken exception to some cokernee geeza effin and c-in at the bar... It normally went: Geez to his mate: Cor what a F-in C he is! She, next to Geez at bar: You do realise that that's a term that's highly offensive to women and I want you to stop using it! Geez: Or f-in what, you C? Partner to She: C'mon Vix me duck, let's go! Geez punches partner in face.

If you're on a phone then the friends feed is the only way... However, if you're on a pc and using a browser, add the Facebook Purity extension. It gets rid of large chunks of stuff you don't want!

Wherever I lay my Hi-hat - Paul Young

There is the other side of the coin though... A few years ago I was in a funk-metal band (!), and the guitarist was what you would call an ordinary geezer. Great player, but liked to make risqué jokes about "birds". Nothing to off-colour, or Bernard Manning but some might find it a touch offensive. Which our drummer did... However, he was considerably more right-on than yow, had virtually zero sense of humour and took offence at absolutely anything, especially if he thought there might be some sort of imagined slight against the Welsh. And he'd constantly have a go at guitarman as well as telling us both what we should be thinking. Eventually Mr Guitar left, and that was the end of the band. Which was a shame as he was good to play with , but drummerboy had a poor sense of timing and kept doing overblown and out-of-place fills that he insisted were from "The Rudiments" but always ended at least a beat late and usually much more...

Six Bad Brothers - Boo Yaa Tribe

Devil Woman -Sir Cliff

Have me had Stiff Little Mingers? or Pubeway Army?

We had a keyboard player once who was always on about "workshy dolies", and was very conservative in his views... So long as he hadn't been on the Stella he tended not to shout very much about looney lefties or whatever, but never ever appeared racist. However, he also bought the Daily Star every day, and after he'd left the band started going on about how we'd all be under Sharia Law soon. And this ranting rose as he came more under the Spell of Stella - soon he was unable to work anymore and could only afford White Lightning. At about this time he also informed me that he'd been playing with Lily Allen, but as he wasn't very handsome they kept him behind a curtain (though I knew for a fact that he hadn't left Swansea, and wasn't very good as a keyboard player either!). And he was also thrown out of the covers band he was in for unreliability, drunken-ness and being too aggressive. However, he'd always been quite unhappy and blamed others for his self-inflicted misfortunes. So while I wouldn't have played with him in a band again, I sympathised with how his life had completely gone down the toilet. He died aged 62 as a result of his booze'n'fags regime.

I've found over the years that the more creative an artist is, the less likely they are to be far right so luckily, I haven't often come up against many fascist type musos, especially if they're any good. However, they may be a touch lefty, but as my position on Political Compass is on the libertarian left of Tony Benn and Gandhi I'm relatively OK with that (unless they get too SWP!).

Money Money Money - ABBA

I'm easy with what ever guitar or bass bands might want to play with the exception of: If I see an acoustic guitar (or worse, two) I'm not hanging around to see the band. Unless it's someone like Antonio Niebla, in which case I can be pretty sure it won't be the dreaded "singer/songwriter or (eeek!!!) folk...

Lol Coxhill doesn't count! I used to play in an improv band with some of his ex-cohorts... They were ever so good at playing in all the keys at the same time!

Star Trekkin' - The Firm

All the songs with kids singing in 'em sound like that, including the Floyd one. Unless they sound like "Grandpa, we love you" with professional old codger Clive Dunn.

Anyone else hate it when a song has kids singing on it?

Garbage Man -The Cramps

And can't be doing with Fender basses either... Only ever played one I liked, which was a very expensive masterbuilt custom shop Jazz. And I didn't like that anywhere near as much as my ACG at 1/4 of the price!

Of course! Never liked crowds...

Easily. Bass solo instead!!! 😁

Calf Trouble (parts 1 & 2) - Adam and the Ants