Jackroadkill

Every now and again, someone mentions getting my old originals band back together for a laugh, and at first it seems like a good idea, because it was fun, but then the longer I think about it the more apparent it becomes that I just don't want to do it. For one thing, it would mean me playing guitar again, for another the singer and I don't seem to be on anything other than extremely cautious speaking terms since our last band folded earlier this year (despite having known each other since we were 13, me being his daughter's insert-deity-of-your-choice-father etc etc). Add that to the smoking wreckage we left out local music scene, the broken hearts, drug dependencies, ruined relationships and unpaid debts and things get a bit sticky. They get stickier still when you add in the very intense intra-band politics and quasi-unionising of the rhythm section, too. So, all in all, I'd rather not. For one thing, the last time we played I was a snake-hipped rock Dionysus, draped with the affections of young ladies (at least in my mind, at any rate), and now I'm a grizzled old f*ck who would break a femur if he popped some of the same moves now. This remains the worst gig I've ever played, by the way, and is also the scene of the final gig with my last band (although we - or at least some of us - didn't know this at the time....). Oh my goodness, but we fancied ourselves something rotten... Yours truly at stage right; I'm truly sorry! So no, the one and only Son Of A Bitch will not be reforming any time soon.

Surely the time is ripe for some sort of Beano-style booby trap here?

Just when you think you've seen it all, eh?!

Much respect to Nicko; a superb drummer and a nice guy, by all accounts. I caught one of his skins at a gig in Manchester about 12 years ago and gave it to a drummer friend who wasn't able to go.

And if I win the lottery, I could be tempted by a Status Shark, in black (of course).

Oh, and a pre-CBS reissue Jazz of some sort.

A nice 4ohm cabinet to go with my Elf. A small, lightweight but poky cab with a tight bottom end, please.

Bastards!!!

A not-very-good original called "This Beast". I was on guitar (never good) and my main job was to chug away in drop D for a bit before ripping out the most pretentious and unskilled lead break, which involved phaser, tremolo and delay pedals, and was "performed" with a bottleneck. In order to complete the cringe-fest I wore a voluminous white shirt over a black sleeveless t-shirt, army boots, a cowboy hat and mirrored shades. The guitar was a Goldtop, so I must have looked and sounded like Eric Sardinas's favourite stalker. I was 23, properly old enough to know better.

They must have been ill; that figure should have been way higher.

That's a great rig. Like mine but bigger!

I'd hope for the latter but suspect the former, in my case!

Call me shallow, but I just like basses that make me feel cool when I play them.

Passive for me; I like the simplicity and the growl. I also can't be bothered to be constantly fiddling with a pre-amp; I tend to use my tone and volume control(s) sparingly.

Excellent! What a great start in his music career.

I'm listening to it now; quite a good record and some very good sounds on it.

That sounds perfectly sensible to me.

Didn't Sandberg to al Olli Riedel signature that was made for BEAD?

Sean bought a pair of Toltec hot Jazz pickups from me; no messing around, straightforward and honest - just what you need.

Major finger breakthrough today; suddenly a load of feeling seems to have come back (it's very itchy!). I'm playing my bass and can feel the pressure in the tip again for the first time when fretting. I think the itching is just the unused nerves firing up again. I can feel the winds of my strings with it, which I couldn't before.

I've been in four projects with a close friend whom I've known since I was 13, but we've drawn a line under making music together because we just can't make it work in the long term. Early on it always feels great - the songs write themselves, the gigs are great, and then.... Something happens, and it goes downhill. It's a shame, as he's a great singer and the loveliest man, but our last effort was enough to convince me that it was never going to work. Andy, I hope your re-kindled bromance works well, my friend!

That's a great result!

I mean you'd be a big strong lad lugging that lot about - round here we'd say "I wouldn't spill his pint" meaning "I wouldn't want to get on the wrong side of him". Only fun intended, sir.