Jackroadkill

I've got a degree; I graduated in Criminology in 2001 and it's been absolutely bloody useless. I wish I'd gone to college and learned how to be a precision engineer.

That was a fugly bass before the termites got at it.

I met Patricia Morrison in High Wycombe in 2000 when she was playing with The Damned. She very kindly signed my copy of Floodland and we talked for a few minutes before I shuffled off, tongue-tied.

From Painted Lady? No, it's Melissa Auf Der Maur, who played in Hole and has been involved in many other projects, most notably her own albums under the Auf Der Maur name. She's a superb lyricist and vocalist as well as a great bass player.

Years ago I cut my roadie teeth working for a Stones tribute act who took attention to detail to a whole new level. They had a plethora of vintage instruments onstage (I think 22 was the most I counted) and all of those were period-correct and song-correct (as in if Keith Richards once played Street Fighting Man on a white 1963 LP Junior, for example, then a guitar of the same type and age would sometimes be used for that song. If he'd not played the song live with that type of guitar it wouldn't be used by the guy who played his parts). Their costumes were either original clothing or carefully made replicas. Amps were similarly accurate. The mannerisms of the actual Stones (or lack thereof where Bill Wyman was concerned) were reproduced by the guys at every show. It all made for a lot of work to stage and the gear cost a fortune but the band was just brilliant and set the standard I've always judged tribute acts on since. Whilst tributes generally aren't my thing there was no denying that these guys were not just some guys with wigs who could play Stones tunes. The song choices were not just the hits, either - sometimes the Stones would play an album track or a deep cut, and those were all features of the set at various points (including Chickensucker Blues...). If you're going to be in the tribute game I think this is the way to do it.

Old: Slightly less old:

We;re learning that one, too. I reckon it'll be a belter when we've got it baked.

This, 100%. There are a million bands out there who play all the standards; I really enjoy not being in any of them.

Depending on the gig we play If You Tolerate This Your Children Will Be Next, and it usually goes down well - with the right crowd. For those who don't know it, it's a song about the Spanish Civil War, and I find it very moving. To be fair, though, Peaches tends to get people dancing a bit more.

Oh hell.... How did I forget Paul Simonon?!

Extra points if you can name them all (no reverse-Googling allowed!). Cliff Burton, obviously, too.

Not had a drink since May 27th 1994, when I was fifteen.

I have a simple metric which I apply to my non-essential purchases, be they bass-related or otherwise; when I'm not at school (I work as a teacher in a small independent SEN school) I supplement my income by working on a farm, mostly doing the menial jobs. If I want to buy something, I work out how many hours of sh*t shovelling I have to do in order to fund that purchase. If it seems like a fair trade, I buy the item. If not, I manage without. I'm not that bothered by the cost, necessarily, in terms of pounds, but knowing that hard graft in the piddling rain on Tom Owen's farm funds such purchases makes me take a long hard look before I spend the profits of those hours on stuff I don't really need (like the American Original J-Bass I have my eye on, for example).

Two updates in a week?! It must be the solvents going to my head... I managed to get a flash coat of primer on the body tonight. Initial prognosis is good, although there are a few very tiny dings that need filling once the paint is dry. I'll attend to these tomorrow, hopefully, and then get a full primer coat on over the weekend. Cheers, JRK

I'm kind of stuck with this one until the weather warms and dries up for any length of time so that I can paint it. I did, however, buy my paint the other day, so have been able to produce this: From left to right we have four bands of colour: grey primer, silver metallic coat and two thin trans red coats; grey primer, sparkle silver metallic coat and two trans red coats; white primer, silver metallic coat and then the TR coats; lastly, white primer, silver sparkle metallic coat and the TR coats. All have a dust coat of clear gloss on top. The photo was taken on a crummy iPhone camera, the board is an old bit of MDF I had kicking around and I didn't do any sanding between coats, so the results are rough and ready but I think I'm going to opt for the last combination (white and silver sparkle). Obviously there'll be much better preparation and flatting between coats, and the clear coat will be a bit thicker and will be properly cut back before polishing, so I'm hoping to get a decent result. Other than that there's not much going on with the build; I have most of the hardware other than the electrics and control plate ready to go, though, so once the paint is finished (hopefully early summer) I might actually have something that resembles a bass. I'm planning to use this one for drop D tunings (which aren't my favourite, but ho-hum). Cheers, JRK

I've just started to learn Holiday in Cambodia - not massively complicated but it's got a kick like an angry Shetland pony.

I bought a Boss CE-1, a real one, not a reissue, for a hundred quid about twenty five years ago. I sold it for £250 five or so years later.... Should have held onto it and sold it in the last few years.

Was that on OK Computer?

Nice to have you with us, my friend.

Woah, that takes me back a bit!

He's not, but I bet he's thinking "Lads, Don't Stand So Close To Me"...

We play that version and I really enjoy it, even though it's not much of a workout it just sounds cool, somehow. Our band has not been onstage since November (we changed our drummer etc etc) but we have a gig at the end of next month, so I'm looking forward to that. We then have another six gigs in five weeks, which will either kill us or sharpen us up nicely! I hope all goes well for you next week.

For me it's finding myself in a flow state. It doesn't happen often but when it does it's incredible.

Die, Die My Darling (I'm suggesting that because my band plays it!).