Worst names for musical equipment

[RAY AGAINST THE MACHINE]

Okay , we all know names like 'Precision' 'Rickenbacker' 'Markbass' etc.
But the names of things being made now , are ,in my opinion slightly embarrassing.

For example, Dean make good basses. However,I'm never gonna ask for a 'Playmate'.
I'm not old enough to remember him ,but it's a saying by Arthur Askey-'Hello playmates' !

Ashdown 'Little Bastards' . Not really good if you're trying to prevent your children from swearing

Are there any more that you can think of?

Edited August 25, 2010 by RAY AGAINST THE MACHINE

[Pete Academy]

Imagine serving a woman who says: 'My son sent me in for a Big Muff.'

[gafbass02]

ASS cabs?

Was the Dean playmate the one with the iffy 'Dean is coming' advert that got pulled?

Edited August 25, 2010 by gafbass02

[basshead56]

Koch amps?

Assmaster?

Attack goat?

Black Finger?

Edited August 25, 2010 by basshead56

[gafbass02]

On the plus side 'Henry the 8x8' Cracking name!

[Mykesbass]

A pal of mine gets really upset with Les Paul signature models - as he says, there's already a signature on a Les Paul.

[Musicman20]

Cheesiest and shittest name for a bass cabinet: Genz Benz 'Uber' bass cabs.

Probably sound great, and they look great!

Genz do seem to be stuck in a rut with their actual aesthetics. I reckon if they got a designer in, to do it more slick, they could sell a lot more.

Basically, make the new Shuttle look like an Apple product (eg slick and/or white).

Edited August 25, 2010 by Musicman20

[paul h]

Fender Twunt?

[Lozz196]

Whilst its visually in keeping with what its ripping off, Tokais Rockinbetter is a seriously un-cool name.

[Oggy]

[quote name='Pete Academy' post='936279' date='Aug 25 2010, 07:18 PM']Imagine serving a woman who says: 'My son sent me in for a Big Muff.'[/quote]

Many years ago I lived on the Isle of Wight - I was in a band called 'Dave Diver and the Muffs' , had to change the name while doing the holiday camps but the prison officers clubs loved it, and they paid well .

Oggy

[Truckstop]

Steinberger always makes me smile inside.

Truckstop

[GazWills]

[quote name='basshead56' post='936295' date='Aug 25 2010, 07:26 PM']Assmaster?[/quote]

yeah, the barker assmaster is one of the best...

just imagine some poor old dear walking out to get her son's xmas present and stopping someone in a guitar shop:

"hello, my son gave me this list of pedals he wants for christmas, i'd like to look at your flanges, and what types of muff do you stock, russian muff, or american muff??? he also mentioned something about an assmaster"

[Cat Burrito]

It was mentioned in the OP but Ashdown 'Little Bastards' simply isn't clever

[tom1946]

[quote name='RAY AGAINST THE MACHINE' post='936273' date='Aug 25 2010, 07:14 PM']Okay , we all know names like 'Precision' 'Rickenbacker' 'Markbass' etc.
But the names of things being made now , are ,in my opinion slightly embarrassing.

For example, Dean make good basses. However,I'm never gonna ask for a 'Playmate'.
I'm not old enough to remember him ,but it's a saying by Arthur Askey-'Hello playmates' !

Ashdown 'Little Bastards' . Not really good if you're trying to prevent your children from swearing

Are there any more that you can think of?[/quote]

I'd love the ashdown LB but I play in a church

[megallica]

[quote name='GazWills' post='936573' date='Aug 25 2010, 11:07 PM']yeah, the barker assmaster is one of the best...

just imagine some poor old dear walking out to get her son's xmas present and stopping someone in a guitar shop:

"hello, my son gave me this list of pedals he wants for christmas, i'd like to look at your flanges, and what types of muff do you stock, russian muff, or american muff??? he also mentioned something about an assmaster" [/quote]

flange - tee hee hee

[BigRedX]

I'm surprised no-ones mentioned any [url="http://www.metasonix.com/"]Metasonix[/url] gear yet. However. looking at their web site it appears that the current range doesn't have the "offensive" names any more. Still they made the best named guitar amp ever...

[flyfisher]

Nah, with the exception of the Ashdown LB, those are all double entendres that Grandma could be forgiven for in the music shop.

Let's cut to the chase . . .

[janmaat]

Adam Black is manufacturing a line of gits and basses called "ASBO" now that's truly what everyone wants to have...

[hillbilly deluxe]

Fender Japan Jaguar Bottom Master

[Cosmo Valdemar]

The Japan-only ESP guitars and basses have some truly astonishing names. Most of them escape me but I always remember one called the 'Halibut'.

[Chris2112]

I think ESP made one called the turbot too!


The Precision bass has always been a duff name, as I generally think of P basses and Gibsons when people talk about wooly sounding basses that play badly - there is nothing precise about them!


Also, not so much the name but the logo of Low End basses is pretty bad. I remember a discussion on Talkbass where people were discussing whether it was supposed to look like an arse or a scrotum. The luthier chimed in and said it was supposed to look like neither. How embarassing.

[hillbilly deluxe]

Precisions were so called because they have frets,and can be played easily with ............erm precision.

now,a fretless Precision on the other hand.

[paul h]

[quote name='hillbilly deluxe' post='937958' date='Aug 27 2010, 11:42 AM']Precisions were so called because they have frets,and can be played easily with ............erm precision.

now,a fretless Precision on the other hand.[/quote]

Fender Approximate.

[Dave Vader]

Making a custom decal for my fretless P project that says Fairly imprecise bass. Thought it might make the gear-peerers chuckle.

[RayFW]

I'm surprised no one has mentioned the Spunky bass yet.