I hate being in my band

[bassbluestew]

Guys,

Whilst I am really,really happy for , and if I am being honest, stlightly ( read very ) jealous of Mr Thisnameistaken. ( At the risk of being perceived as homophobic which I am sooo not darling ) it [i]is[/i] MISTER Thisnameistaken ?? Just the avatar - that's all. Very attractive btw.

Sorry, back on topic. I started my band with the drummer some 6 years ago. We are a quality wedding band - not cheap - and we occassionally venture successfully into the corporate market too.
The problem is that very early on I relinquished manager duties to our present manager as it was getting too much as I was training for a new job and just didn't have time to do everything. We also have a sound engineer, and its a 6 piece band. So were a big ticket item and I just feel we are pulling in too many directions.
Our keyboeard player is a complete social retard and I haven't actually spoken a word to him in more than a year ( thats probably 120 gigs and 30 rehearsals - and not a dicky bird ) Anyone who has met me knows how unlikely that is. I'm a nice guy, honest !!!! But very soon, I am going to maim him in a very bad way.( Could I just insert at this point that I never would - just in case he gets mugged and this post. finds the light of day. Its a figure of speech m'lud. ) He's a talented player, has never played in any other band of note, and when he joined us he was a shy wee thing and we really worked at bringing him out of his shell and bigging up his very obvious talent. He has continued to flourish, but, and here's the rub, he has started to believe his own press and now thinks he is the bees knees. I must say in fairness that he is very good, and real perfectionist ( 1st class honours in Stats, and closet OCD ) but he is by no means the best I have ever played with. And his plack of social skills is beginning to annoy other folks too. Frannkenstein could learn from this guy.

Anyway, as I hoped, I now feel much better for getting that off my chest and am now looking forward to tonights gig, and not just the paypacket. I don't want to quit as I feel that despite everything its my baby still. But if things don't improve soon I WILL be off. I must retain my sanity.

Thanks for all the collective shoulders !!

S

[xgsjx]

If you have spare time, why not start your own side project (maybe with the drummer & one other musician). This will let you release your musical frustration & get to play with your fx that you haven't even been allowed to mention
Works for me & the side project is now the main band!

[steve-soar]

[quote name='phil.i.stein' post='990142' date='Oct 16 2010, 01:02 PM']just as well he didn't play violin, that literally would have made him a kiddy fiddler.

..oops, sorry, i'm such a prat sometimes, i even surprise myself.

anyway back on (or perhaps off ?) topic..[/quote]Back of the net, cash back.

[thisnameistaken]

[quote name='bassbluestew' post='990022' date='Oct 16 2010, 11:09 AM']( At the risk of being perceived as homophobic which I am sooo not darling ) it [i]is[/i] MISTER Thisnameistaken ?? Just the avatar - that's all. Very attractive btw.[/quote]

FTR I am a bloke and I am straight, I just got the hunky homos avatar recently to balance out all the airhead bimbo avatars.

Edited October 16, 2010 by thisnameistaken

[ahpook]

[quote name='bassbluestew' post='990022' date='Oct 16 2010, 11:09 AM']He's a talented player, has never played in any other band of note, and when he joined us he was a shy wee thing and we really worked at bringing him out of his shell and bigging up his very obvious talent. He has continued to flourish, but, and here's the rub, he has started to believe his own press and now thinks he is the bees knees.[/quote]

aww prafessah 'iggins, wot 'ave you dun ?

[phil.i.stein]

[quote name='steve-soar' post='990266' date='Oct 16 2010, 02:50 PM']Back of the net, cash back.[/quote]
cheers steve.

[Tuco]

[quote name='xgsjx' post='990197' date='Oct 16 2010, 01:53 PM']If you have spare time, why not start your own side project (maybe with the drummer & one other musician). This will let you release your musical frustration & get to play with your fx that you haven't even been allowed to mention
Works for me & the side project is now the main band![/quote]

wise words

[Sean]

[quote name='thisnameistaken' post='990267' date='Oct 16 2010, 02:52 PM']FTR I am a bloke and I am straight, I just got the hunky homos avatar recently to balance out all the airhead bimbo avatars.[/quote]

FTR my avatar ladies are neither bimbos nor airheads! Thank you very much!
;-)

[Alien]

As this thread has nothing whatsoever to do with effects, I'm moving it to General Bass Discussion.

A

[JTUK]

If it is your band, sack him, or threaten to. Might bring him down to planet earth and everyone wins.... maybe..!!

[ThomBassmonkey]

Probably worth having a word with him?

If he's a prat and a social retard, last thing you want is for him to turn up at a posh gig and make a fool of the band.

[Pete Academy]

[quote name='thisnameistaken' post='990267' date='Oct 16 2010, 02:52 PM']FTR I am a bloke and I am straight, I just got the hunky homos avatar recently to balance out all the airhead bimbo avatars.[/quote]

Somebody actually said to me the other day: 'Is thisnameistaken gay?'

[thisnameistaken]

[quote name='Pete Academy' post='991531' date='Oct 17 2010, 07:59 PM']Somebody actually said to me the other day: 'Is thisnameistaken gay?'[/quote]

Sorry boys!

[mep]

Is he on the Autistic spectrum at all by chance. There are a lot of undiagnosed people out there struggling with social & emotional development & behaviour.

[Pete Academy]

[quote name='mep' post='991586' date='Oct 17 2010, 08:47 PM']Is he on the Autistic spectrum at all by chance. There are a lot of undiagnosed people out there struggling with social & emotional development & behaviour.[/quote]

[EdwardHimself]

[quote name='mep' post='991586' date='Oct 17 2010, 08:47 PM']Is he on the Autistic spectrum at all by chance. There are a lot of undiagnosed people out there struggling with social & emotional development & behaviour.[/quote]

+1. Yeah i think calling people "social retards" just because they are not blessed with the same social skills as most people is a very harsh thing to say. For all you know he could have something like aspergers or something like that. Have you tried asking him?

[ezbass]

[quote name='EdwardHimself' post='991593' date='Oct 17 2010, 08:54 PM']Have you tried asking him?[/quote]
The clue to this question is in the OP's post

[quote name='bassbluestew' post='990022' date='Oct 16 2010, 11:09 AM']I haven't actually spoken a word to him in more than a year[/quote]
I don't think I've been in a band where's it's been all sweetness and light, it seems to be par for the course that there is always some friction, particularly bigger bands. Maybe I haven't been in the right bands.

Edited October 18, 2010 by ezbass

[Earbrass]

[quote name='thisnameistaken' post='990267' date='Oct 16 2010, 02:52 PM']FTR I am a bloke and I am straight, I just got the hunky homos avatar recently to balance out all the airhead bimbo avatars.[/quote]

Respect! I didn't know you had done this, as I have avatars switched off specifically to avoid the saddo girly pix, and was actually considering doing the same myself, but typically never got round to it.

[EdwardHimself]

[quote name='ezbass' post='991955' date='Oct 18 2010, 09:11 AM']The clue to this question is in the OP's post


I don't think I've been in a band where's it's been all sweetness and light, it seems to be par for the course that there is always some friction, particularly bigger bands. Maybe I haven't been in the right bands.[/quote]

Well there you go. TBH i am going to suggest that since the OP has not actually replied yet, that he is trolling.

[Heathy]

For me, the beauty of being an amateur musician is that I don't have to do anything for one moment longer than I want to!

However, if you get out be careful how you do it. I thought I was being very fair when I recently left my band, but am currently having problems with a bunny-boiler ex-singer!