martthebass Posted March 1, 2011 Share Posted March 1, 2011 The sort of stress you seem to be suffering makes it sound more like 'work' than 'play'. Either drop a notch and take it less seriously or bin it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MB1 Posted March 1, 2011 Share Posted March 1, 2011 MB1. Sounds like your sending out an S.O.S? Which strangely also stands for Self Opinionated Singer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
witterth Posted March 1, 2011 Share Posted March 1, 2011 [quote name='cetera' post='1145939' date='Mar 1 2011, 03:53 PM']Feck it off and find something else....[/quote] Hes right you know. if you're working another job the band should be fun...and is your leisure time, enough stress at work without adding to it eh? "big long strides in the opposite direction" is what I'd say Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JTUK Posted March 1, 2011 Share Posted March 1, 2011 [quote name='Marvin' post='1145933' date='Mar 1 2011, 03:50 PM']It is rather a long list of things that seem to be making you unhappy with the band. Always a difficult decision to pack it in though.[/quote] I can't see what is difficult about this decision, just surprised you have hung in long enough to accrue all this grief.... move on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blademan_98 Posted March 1, 2011 Share Posted March 1, 2011 +1 to the above. Take the drummer and start a new band Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAY AGAINST THE MACHINE Posted March 1, 2011 Share Posted March 1, 2011 L.......e......a.......v....e..... now !! (or do a documentary of the band , and put it on you tube) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrtcat Posted March 1, 2011 Share Posted March 1, 2011 Sharp exit for you and the drummer with an invitation for the guitards to come as long as they quit whining about drum volume would be my solution. A bass / drum partnership will not struggle to attract guitars and vox if you're tight already. Good luck - it'll work out for the best! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skankdelvar Posted March 1, 2011 Share Posted March 1, 2011 [quote]When we brought it up he said "if someone wants to say something they should get a mic."[/quote] There's your problem. Talentless, late, won't score gigs [i]and [/i]a smart-arse Either you leave; or you leave with the drummer; or you find a new singer. Imagine the joy that will pulse through your soul when you completely fire this ****wit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcnach Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 [quote name='krth1985' post='1145919' date='Mar 1 2011, 03:41 PM']I dont want to come across as moaning, and being ungrateful, but (!) there's a few things niggling away at me and i get in the mood where i think i should leave because being in the band is just not fun anymore. Here's my reasons. - No camaraderie. Not at rehearsals, or at a gig. Feels like 5 individuals, not 1 band. -Singer and lead guitarist saying drummer is too loud. I dont agree. In small venues he will be loud, theres no volume knob on the drums. Yet this is always brought up, and the drummer cant get through to them that he doesnt play loud, drums are just a loud instrument. He does have something which he puts on his shells to dampen the sound slightly (big plastic rings?) - Too much negativity. Constantly being told at soundcheck before gigs that we sound sh*t (by singer). That we "murder" this song and that. Also I feel like i am being watched and my performance monitored. After every gig there is an email that goes out. 99% of it is negative. - Too much pressure. Lead guitarist constantly going on about stage presence and we need to move about more. Its not my thing, and i'd feel awkward doing it. Plus, we are not that type of band. Plus its hard to enjoy yourself after the above comment. Also comments on dynamics. Gives each part of a song a rating out of 10 for dynamics. What the difference between 7 or 8 is i dont know... - Timekeeping. Singer is always late. For both rehearsals and gigs. Not by 5 or ten minutes, but by 30 minutes plus. Last gig we did was friday. We needed to be there early to soundcheck. Everyone was down there for 6pm. I didnt finish work till 6 so said i'd be down for 7. After a long 12 hour day at the end of the week not ideal, but i rushed around, got my stuff together and i was there for 7. Singer rolls in 30-40 minutes after me. - Arguments over upcoming EP. We are finishing off the 4 track EP this weekend. The songs were decided without me (i had to work but put forward my choice of 4 or 5 songs). After everyone else met up with the producer they all decided on 4 songs, 3 of which i had hoped to do anway so all was good. Now as of last week the signer kicks up a fuss about the new lyrics for one of the tracks. I said i wasnt involved in the final decision making process, so why didnt u say something then? He shrugged. I said who actually voted for the song? Turns out only me and the lead guitarist. So i said why are we recording it then? I then pointed out that we have tracked demos for these songs, and the producer is expecting us to do this song. Saying your not happy about the song a week before we enter the studio is pointless. His reply was "f*** it, we will just do it". So we will all be recording this song knowing that the singer isnt bothered about it. - Appreciation for the promoter/soundman/other bands etc - He never says thanks to so and so for playing, or thanks to promoter for putting on this gig, or thanks to the fans for coming to see us, or thanks to said band for letting us on the bill with them. When we brought it up he said "if someone wants to say something they should get a mic." - The booking of gigs. The singer thinks some of the gigs we do "turn off potential fans". These are your usual 4 band line-up at a venue thats established for live music. - but yet tried booking us to play a 60th birthday party? We are not a covers band by the way. He also refused to book gigs now because "knobody gets back to him". By that he means he agrees to a gig thinking everyone will be ok with it and gets pissed off when someone says they cant make it. - Band website - It was agreed a few months ago that I would re-design the website as it looked sh*te basically. I am in no way a professional, but i did 2 years of it at college, (and ran my own websites after leaving college for a bit of pocket money) and and i am proficient enough to come up with a decent website. The next day, the website had changed again. I now no longer give out our website address! and -Singers vocals. Really grates on me now. I'm not much of a fan of Oasis, but he is. Can you tell? (but i dont think i can count that as a reason) Does this sound like a happy functioning band? Or a band that will soon implode? Or is it just me nit picking???? [/quote] two or three of those are enough for me. A whole list? It's a no brainer. Unless I'm making good money, it's got to be fun. Otherwise, I'm walking. It helps if you're involved in a couple of different bands. Then it's not so "scary" to leave one band that makes you unhappy, and having a second band that you enjoy helps you notice with the other doesn't work for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Algae Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 Yes of course. Music should be fun so if your band is not fun any more you need a new one. Time to move on dude. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sean Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 (edited) [quote name='krth1985' post='1145919' date='Mar 1 2011, 03:41 PM']- Too much negativity. Constantly being told at soundcheck before gigs that we sound sh*t (by singer). That we "murder" this song and that. Also I feel like i am being watched and my performance monitored. After every gig there is an email that goes out. 99% of it is negative.[/quote] That's enough for me to say, quit. Looks like there are bullying issues from people who projecting issues from other parts of their lives onto members of the band. Get out and save yourself the hassle. If you're the type maybe you'll get some payback by punching someone's lights out too or nitromors their car or burn their shed down or make them kiss the gunner's daughter or walk the plank Edited March 2, 2011 by Sean Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Norris Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 The singer says you sound cr*p but doesn't make the effort to actually turn up on time to the soundcheck? By now you've read all the other replies, so don't need me to tell you what an ar*e he is... ... and you already know what to do - you don't need us to tell you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linus27 Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 Two ways I would play it, as you really are not happy then just walk away. On the other hand I would be tempted to give the singer and guitarist a bit of their own medicine and play them at their own game. I would have some fun with it as you have nothing to lose as it will either improve or you will leave anyway. Your singer says if anyone wants to say something then they should get a mic so get a mic and do the talking between the songs, introducing the songs, thanking people, telling the crowd what the band are up to etc. He'll soon get pissed off that you are the spokesman and people are listening to you and not him. Again, these emails where he reviews the gig etc. Do your own and point out that he was late and this is affecting our performance as everyone is rushing and stressed. Tell him he's not commited where everyone else is and question his commitment. If he says you murdered a song, just say if you turned up on time, the rest of us might be able to focus on the songs rather than worry if you were turning up or not. Play the guitarist at his own game and say that some comments you got after the gig was the bass and drums seemed the most professional and locked in where the guitarist seemed to be doing his own thing and not part of the band. Even go as far and say he had no pressence Might get them out of their ivory towers and back in the real world and if not then find another band and be happy with them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
krth1985 Posted March 2, 2011 Author Share Posted March 2, 2011 I never realised most of the problems related to the singer, but reading back on my original post im struggling to come up with any positives. I think the fact that we all mates and or related to each other somehow makes it a little harder. I never mentioned this in the first post as i when we are in the band i think all alliances should be left at the door and everyone should be treated as equals. Singer and rhythm guitarist are both brothers. Drummer is my cousin. The rhythm guitarist is my best mate, and the lead guitarist is a friend of the singers! Although i did speak to the rhythm guitarist last night and said i feel there is a lack of respect in the band, and too much negativity and pressure to "perform" - which he agree'd. Band practice tonight, so i think i'll have to bring it up. Although whenever i do bring things up it just turns into a massive argument and nothing gets resolved I'll report back later tonight...maybe in the wanted section! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lozz196 Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 I think out of the list of irritations, most bands would have some of them. However, having all of them - get out now. Good points been made about taking the drummer with you - tight bass & drums should have no problem getting other musicians to work with. A band I was in had many of those irritations, mostly down to one person (isn`t it always the way - and usually the least able of the bunch), and I stuck around, til I found another band to join. It was only then I realised how much of my time I`d been wasting, all for the occaisonal enjoyable moment - approx one gig a month. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skankdelvar Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 [quote name='krth1985' post='1147127' date='Mar 2 2011, 02:09 PM']Band practice tonight, so i think i'll have to bring it up.[/quote] So you don't get sidetracked into irrelevancies, print out your OP / list of issues and take it with you. And a selection of some of the choicer comments from this thread. Should do the trick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rich Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 [quote name='krth1985' post='1145919' date='Mar 1 2011, 03:41 PM']- No camaraderie. Not at rehearsals, or at a gig. Feels like 5 individuals, not 1 band[/quote] For me, this alone is reason enough to walk away. No bond, no band, no point. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
krth1985 Posted March 2, 2011 Author Share Posted March 2, 2011 [quote name='skankdelvar' post='1147133' date='Mar 2 2011, 02:16 PM']So you don't get sidetracked into irrelevancies, print out your OP / list of issues and take it with you. And a selection of some of the choicer comments from this thread. Should do the trick.[/quote] Yeah i will do cheers Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
krth1985 Posted March 3, 2011 Author Share Posted March 3, 2011 To cut a long story short, issues have been addressed (turns out i wasnt the only one) so iv said i will see if the situation improves over the next few weeks, and if not then i'll be off as i dont see it working for me - 3 things i want out of this band: respect, a bit of camaraderie and enjoyment Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JTUK Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 Sounds fair enough... sometimes it is better to have the ruck and then as long you can move on from that, then that might clear the air and reitetrate a few failed understandi8ngs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4-string-thing Posted March 4, 2011 Share Posted March 4, 2011 I left a band a few weeks ago..... I used to think that any band is better than no band..... I still do Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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