Doctor J Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 [quote name='thunderbird13' post='1148573' date='Mar 3 2011, 04:39 PM']Actually this is the phrase which annoys me "[b]Thanks very much for playing with us but we feel that due to our own fragility, we need a more solid foundation[/b]." I think their saying I'm rubbish [/quote]I think they're saying they're arseholes I think they've done you a favour, to be honest. Move on, you're definitely better off out of that situation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jezzaboy Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 (edited) Tb, don`t be down hearted. I`m am possibly the most un-talanted (no my mistake, I am the most un-talanted!) bass player on this site with a big gob to match and I play in a reasonably busy covers band. It`s all about getting together with a decent bunch of like minded folks. The 4 of us get along pretty good apart from the occasional dose of lead singers disease. Start your own band? Time for a Basschat group hug Jez Edited March 3, 2011 by jezzaboy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gary mac Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 Best of luck matey. Do something different for a few days if you have the time/inclination, then come back and find yourself a decent band where your talent is appreciated. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spongebob Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 +1 on all of the above. I've just left my band because of a number of issues, something I've done before and probably will do 1000 times again. I think it was Mark E. Smith who once said that he hates musicians. From most of the bands I've dealt with, he wasn't far wrong! It's always easy when you leave/get sacked to think that you're in the wrong....'why are they still together'? But it's you who's had the lucky escape. You're better off on your own playing along to a CD on a desert island than with that bunch by the sound of things. Like so many of us on here at the moment.......gotta get back on that horse!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Machines Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 3 out of 4 bands I left never met up again afterwards. Not sure if that's something to be proud of or not ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jam Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 Perhaps if you spent less time counting numbers and spent more time playing bass then you'd still be in the band! Seriously though, don't let this get you down. Keep your kit and keep playing at home, play the songs YOU want to play and the right people will come along eventually. If they don't think you're a good player (and I'm sure you are, most people are very modest about their skill), prove them wrong and use this time to get even better than you are now. Blow them out of the water! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris2112 Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 Start a Return to Forever covers band and come back and play these guys under the table. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JTUK Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 I must admit, I have bands that sort the musical aspect out first..then it is expected that everyone will be grown up enough to work things out for the good of the whole. My current fave unit has 4 out of 5 people all pulling the same way and the fifth is mostly able to deal with his conflicts via the diary. Everyone has more important things that may flare up (relationships, mostly ) and you have to accomodate them, but it really really has to work on a fundemental level..either you are all great mates or the music is right or whatever, but the good things have to be worth all the little things that can turn it. That is why I don't mind people doing the gigs for the money..if that focuses them to the required degree, we get what we want and they get what they want/need. We make sure we have a few decent payers otherwise the logical extreme would be the guy always goes for the best money. You have to like what you are doing and I can honestly say, I don't play with arseholes. As long as people are pretty straight on why they can't/wont do a gig, then we can understand and be grown up about it. The one thing we did..prior to this current band getting going, was to outline what we wanted to do. we knew the music was going to work, so we decided on how many gigs and rehearsals and how far we could push things. It is working so far but if you are together for say, 2 years..you will hit a few snags. If you can't talk about and get through a disagreement, then you haven't really got much holding things together in all probability. Being easy going is a plus..but not a push-over. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flyfisher Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 [quote name='Gareth Hughes' post='1148385' date='Mar 3 2011, 02:08 PM']Don't sell your gear - why would you let idiots like that take away something you enjoy?[/quote] Too right! If you enjoy playing bass, play bass, and don't let anyone (asshole or not) decide for you. Plus, something right will eventually turn up and how will you feel that a bunch of assholes put you off so much that you'll have to miss out? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drewm Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 [quote name='JPS' post='1148492' date='Mar 3 2011, 03:41 PM']Don't forget that if 90% of people are arseholes, then the figure is probably about 98% for"musicians".[/quote] The remaining 2% are bass players, right? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tino Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 [quote name='Machines' post='1148607' date='Mar 3 2011, 05:06 PM']3 out of 4 bands I left never met up again afterwards. Not sure if that's something to be proud of or not ![/quote] I hear they did,but just left you off the invites Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EBS_freak Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 Ah well, join me. I was sacked when my originals band landed a support slot for the biggest Britpop band come back gigs. The group of friends decided they'd push me (the outsider) out and get their original bass player mate in. Can happen to anybody. It's not always about being able to do the job and being loyal to the band. Friendships run deeper than that it would seem! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blademan_98 Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 I tell you what, give em my details and I will play for them. They will get you back in no time They will realise that they already had the best! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karlfer Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 Find a local jam night. Go for 3 or 4 weeks, see what numbers are being played. Learn just a couple of them in your own time. When you are ready, just have a word with the organiser, "any chance I can play on >>>>>>>>>>>>> tonight?" Trust me, you will have been sussed by then and they will encourage you. Once you've done that, made some friends and some contacts, you will get further opportunities. All the best, Karl. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EssentialTension Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 [quote name='MythSte' post='1148398' date='Mar 3 2011, 02:14 PM']I'm sure they exist, but I've honestly never met a cover band that is full of genuine people. There is such an air of superiority surrounding all the people I've met. Even the bands I've auditioned for playing covers have been so far up their own backsides a sneeze could be fatal. Anyway, maybe think about getting together an original band with some mates, just for a laugh? [/quote] That's pretty much the exact opposite of my experience. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paul_5 Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 I've worked with loads of covers bands who all talk a good game, but are actually fairly dire, sounds like you've had a lucky escape. Keep hold of your kit, put it away for a while and spend some time with family and friends. Maybe one day soon you'll be listening to music and remember what it was that inspired you to play in the first place. At that point you can open a cupboard and fall in love with it again. If you sell your kit then it will be too much of a hassle to start again, and you'll start making excuses for not getting back into it (shop's closed, no petrol etc...).I know a couple of players who have sold up, and they really regret it. Also, who says you need a band? what about simply enjoying playing for your own entertainment? Maybe the thread should read 'Paroled again"? Chin up mucker. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thunderbird13 Posted March 3, 2011 Author Share Posted March 3, 2011 (edited) rubbish- now I've just got home and found out that the tenants in my flat are refusing to pay the rent - some days its just not worth getting out of bed !! anyway thanks for your replies - I do feel more positive and perhaps a break might do me good . maybe I'll start taking an interest in that Bodhran I bought last summer Edited March 3, 2011 by thunderbird13 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcnach Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 [quote name='Gareth Hughes' post='1148385' date='Mar 3 2011, 02:08 PM']That's what I think has happened. If you're all just in it for fun, not looking to gig or 'make it' then someone is taking it WAY too seriously if they felt the need to fire you. Sounds like you're better off not being in that situation. Don't sell your gear - why would you let idiots like that take away something you enjoy? Jam along to records at home - that can be a lot more fun and certainly a lot more musically satisfying than playing with someone that thinks they're the next Hendrix.[/quote] +1 If we decide someone is not strong enough, first we talk to him. Unless he was a "mercenary" who just joined for a temporary situation, when there's a concern about a member, the first thing is to have a chat. Sometimes a band has to let a member go, for various reasons, but there's no reason not to make it in a civilised way, with tact, and friendly. It sounds like you may have had fun with that band, but they don't seem a great bunch to hang out with... The sad thing is...it's difficult to find a good band where everybody is on the same page and everyone is a reasonable human being. But don't give up. They exist. Just swim a little faster. Join band, gauge situation... if not right, move on. I've moved on a fair bit, and eventually you find the right people. Besides, the right people (by me) tend to like the same type of "right people", and once you enter the network it becomes easier to meet more of the same kind. Then when bands disintegrate, new ones form in a breeze with people who have the same understanding. Or/and you get called to join others, since A knows you play with band X, and his very reaosnable mates B and C play in that band and they vouched for you. It's tough... but good times are out there. Keep at it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leschirons Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 I'm a firm believer that if there is a problem with someone's performance, be it musical. work related etc, they should always be given to chance to put things right or at least comment on the situation. That's assuming the criticism is even justified in the first place. I reckon you're better off without this bunch. It also seems that covers bands are the worst anyway. Full of people who don't have the talent to compose or get into pro outfits (including me) and they don't like their egos dented. When I moved here, I left a covers/function band in the UK that I'd been in for 13 years (my brother remained in the band) He left 3 months ago under a cloud having dared to comment on the wannabe rock god guitarist's ability and they also told him at the time that the band had been so much better since your brother left (me) Apparently due to the fact that I was too critical of the band's performance. Bloody hell, if you're taking £750 off someone it needs to be right. But now, they can all stroke each other's egos and convince themselves it's great. Don't sell your gear, take a break, you'll find another band with sensible people in it eventually. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcnach Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 [quote name='BurritoBass' post='1148393' date='Mar 3 2011, 02:12 PM']Sorry to hear this. I wouldn't let a couple of bad experiences put you off. Sometimes we just aren't right for certain bands (you acknowledge that it wasn't your dream band & I suspect they picked up on this).[/quote] That too. The only time a band fired me it was just like that. I had joined the band, they seemed nice guys, I liked the music... It wasn't great, but it was fun. The main reason I joined them though was that they seemed ready to gig. They had been gigging a lot, stopped for a few months when teh drummer had a baby, and they were re-starting, with the original bassist moving to lead guitar and bringing a new bassist: me. However, I lost my interest quickly: 1) extremely loud rehearsals: it was very hard to tell whether we sounded ok or not. It was all mush. 2) rehearsed in a terrible place, with poor kit. In particular bass amplification was very underpowered and sounded like crap having band after band playing with all controls maxed out. 3) ex-bassist didn't have a clue about guitar amp settings and was extremely sensitive. Any hint seemed like a personal attack to him, by his body language and general attitude. 4) the three of them knew eachother for a few years and had one big common interest: football. #1 I made some progress on that over a couple of rehearsals. They did agree it sounded better and could hear eachother better. However volume crept in again vith a vengeance, partly due to #3 #2 We stopped rehearsing there, and found another not-so-great place, that was ok. I appreciated that my opinions were heard (for #1 and #2) #3 new lead guitarist decided to spalsh on FX pedals, but forgot a tuner. He'd go out of tune and nobody said a thing. I can't stand that, so I would offer my tuner as a gentle hint. It was not accepted. He'd spend the rehearsal fiddling with the amp knobs complaining he couldn't hear himself. His main tactic was to turn the volume up. Hence the volume levels generally crept back in. It was not enough. I tried to help him by suggesting he turned down treble a bit and actually work with the mids, as well as reducing gain in his pedals & amp. I guess it seemed that i was trying to dictate "his tone" or something. I don't tend to insist when I offer help and they turn it down... So there was nowhere else for me to go... #4 didn't help, it made small chat difficult. We were never going to be great mates, if that's their main conversational piece. So it wasn't fun. A month into the band I was thinking I should leave. But I told myself I wanted to have one gig at least with them, as I thought the music would be fun to play live. But it showed I was just going through the motions at rehearsal and didn't bother with volume or anything. So one week I say I would not be able to make next rehearsal. That was true. A few days later I said "actually, the one after is off too for me". I just didn't like it anymore. I figured we were as good as we were going to be before the gig scheduled a month away... and I could use the space. During that first week I started questioning the whole "continuing just for a gig or two". But I didn't get a chance to come clean about my feelings. I got an email from the drummer saying that they noticed I was not really enjoying it and didn't fit with the rest of the band... so they thought they'd be better off without me, and they could always do the gig as a 3 piece like they used to if they had to. I was a little annoyed they were faster than me But it was right. If I'm not really into the band... it's only fair for everyone involved that I walk out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fatback Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 (edited) [quote name='thunderbird13' post='1149021' date='Mar 3 2011, 10:42 PM']anyway thanks for your replies - I do feel more positive and perhaps a break might do me good . maybe I'll start taking an interest in that Bodhran I bought last summer [/quote] Do NOT, repeat - DO NOT PLAY THE BODHRAN! Or at least, not in public. If you think you were a social misfit before, you are guaranteed to be one if you do that. Joke - What is the difference between a bodhran player and a terrorist? Terrorists have sympathisers. Ha ha. But seriously, don't give up playing for anything. You just need to find like-minded people, preferably people that want to gig. Rehearsal bands tend to navel gaze imo cos there's nothing to measure against except how good or bad someone feels on the day. A gigging band goes: that was a good gig / ok gig / sh**e gig, and it all makes sense. Having the odd jam is one thing, but playing regularly with no notion of performing or recording is like some kind of weird group therapy imo. Edited March 3, 2011 by fatback Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
icastle Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 (edited) [quote name='fatback' post='1149067' date='Mar 3 2011, 11:16 PM']Do NOT, repeat - DO NOT PLAY THE BODHRAN! Or at least, not in public. If you think you were a social misfit before, you are guaranteed to be one if you do that. Joke - What is the difference between a bodhran player and a terrorist? Terrorists have sympathisers.[/quote] +1 Only one thing worse than a bodhran and that's a bodhran with someone smacking it! EDIT: Thinking about it, a didgerydon't is pretty bad as well... Edited March 3, 2011 by icastle Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xilddx Posted March 4, 2011 Share Posted March 4, 2011 Alistair, I'm sorry to hear this mate. You seem to hook up with the wrong people. And, please correct me if I'm wrong, you seem to lack a little confidence with your playing. I've gone years without a gig myself, and so have lots of people on BC. It will happen for you if you don't give up. All the best mate. Keep up thy chin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stingrayPete1977 Posted March 4, 2011 Share Posted March 4, 2011 [quote name='MythSte' post='1148398' date='Mar 3 2011, 02:14 PM']I'm sure they exist, but I've honestly never met a cover band that is full of genuine people. There is such an air of superiority surrounding all the people I've met. Even the bands I've auditioned for playing covers have been so far up their own backsides a sneeze could be fatal. Anyway, maybe think about getting together an original band with some mates, just for a laugh? [/quote] I too have to disagree, I have played in few and all the guys and deps have been great overall IME, many more egos been rubbed up the wrong way when I was in the originals scene. [quote name='EBS_freak' post='1148791' date='Mar 3 2011, 07:35 PM']Ah well, join me. I was sacked when my originals band landed a support slot for the biggest Britpop band come back gigs. The group of friends decided they'd push me (the outsider) out and get their original bass player mate in. Can happen to anybody. It's not always about being able to do the job and being loyal to the band. Friendships run deeper than that it would seem![/quote] And where are they without you now Russ? (alphabet song was good though I'll give them that one) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EBS_freak Posted March 4, 2011 Share Posted March 4, 2011 [quote name='stingrayPete1977' post='1149121' date='Mar 4 2011, 12:28 AM']I too have to disagree, I have played in few and all the guys and deps have been great overall IME, many more egos been rubbed up the wrong way when I was in the originals scene.[/quote] Defo - the originals scene is full of far more pumped up, fake, egotistical, think they are better than they really are so and sos. No question. [quote]And where are they without you now Russ? (alphabet song was good though I'll give them that one)[/quote] I wouldn't know. Ha yeah, alphabet song was a stroke of genius. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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