Pete Academy Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Venue owners: 'We can't really pay you much. Just treat it as a rehearsal.' We've already rehearsed enough...that's why we're here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stingrayPete1977 Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Can you start about 11.30pm thats when it gets packed. 2 pissed old bags is not packed and its passed my bedtime! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BassBus Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Walking out the pub the other night with my double bass: "That's a big guitar". How many times have I heard that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Academy Posted May 29, 2011 Author Share Posted May 29, 2011 Sound engineers: 'Bass is bass, innit?' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Telebass Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 "We can't pay you much/anything" "That's OK, we won't play anything, then" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doddy Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 (edited) "I'm/my mate/significant other/brother, is/used to be in a band............" Edited May 29, 2011 by Doddy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
waynepunkdude Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 [quote name='Doddy' post='1249290' date='May 29 2011, 03:29 PM']"I'm/my mate/significant other/brother, is/used to be in a band............"[/quote] This. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Academy Posted May 29, 2011 Author Share Posted May 29, 2011 'Your drummer's good, but I know someone who can do this gig better.' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slipperydick Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Why dont you smile ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LawrenceH Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 'Wow that guitarist you've got is effing brilliant' ...after said guitarist has royally f*****d up the rest of the band the entire night with their sloppy rhythm playing, lack of structure/harmonic awareness and not listening to what anyone else is doing, only concentrating properly on their over-indulgent loud rock solos. In a funk band. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Academy Posted May 29, 2011 Author Share Posted May 29, 2011 [quote name='Slipperydick' post='1249300' date='May 29 2011, 03:33 PM']Why dont you smile ?[/quote] Yep, heard that many times. Why should I be grinning like a goon? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Bass Doc Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Punter "Ooh, I see you've got a saxophone in your band. Will you play Baker Street?" Us, "Yes we have and no we won't". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Foxen Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 [quote name='Pete Academy' post='1249297' date='May 29 2011, 03:31 PM']'Your drummer's good, but I know someone who can do this gig better.'[/quote] This is how The Who were introduced to Moon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimR Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Can you play something that everyone will dance to BUT don't play any....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pete.young Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 [quote name='BassBus' post='1249284' date='May 29 2011, 03:24 PM']Walking out the pub the other night with my double bass: "That's a big guitar". How many times have I heard that. [/quote] Or "thats a big violin, can you fit it under your chin?" The polite answer: "No, I need to borrow two or three of yours" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Academy Posted May 29, 2011 Author Share Posted May 29, 2011 [quote name='Mr. Foxen' post='1249319' date='May 29 2011, 03:51 PM']This is how The Who were introduced to Moon.[/quote] Good point. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crez5150 Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Them - 'Can you play Sex on Fire..........' Me - 'Yes, now f*** off!' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LawrenceH Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 [quote name='Mr. Foxen' post='1249319' date='May 29 2011, 03:51 PM']This is how The Who were introduced to Moon.[/quote] And if I were Mitch Mitchell and it'd been my kit he smashed the s*** out of, then I'd have found it quite annoying! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EssentialTension Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 'Can you do something more up to date?' 'Yes, we wrote the next one this morning.' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Academy Posted May 29, 2011 Author Share Posted May 29, 2011 'Why do you want to raise those speakers up? The bass sounds better on the stage.' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Len_derby Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 A youngish lad, probably early twenties, comes up at the end all smiles. 'Thanks, that was great,.............my Dad would really love you lot'. To be honest, I was amused. Been thinking of having a tee-shirt made that says 'your Dad would love us'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Academy Posted May 29, 2011 Author Share Posted May 29, 2011 After you've played a few notes, the sound engineer says: 'OK, that'll do.' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Bass Doc Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Them "Can you play anything out of the charts?" Us "Yes, this next one's been out of the charts for about 40 years". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stingrayPete1977 Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 "Is anyone sitting there?" "No that big f***ing massive black box behind those seats that looks like a big massive f*** off speaker [i]is[/i] a big massive f*** off speaker thats why no one is sitting there" Is what your thinking, In reality "No help yourself aunt Freeda" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Academy Posted May 29, 2011 Author Share Posted May 29, 2011 [quote name='The Bass Doc' post='1249350' date='May 29 2011, 04:16 PM']Them "Can you play anything out of the charts?" Us "Yes, this next one's been out of the charts for about 40 years".[/quote] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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