Hobbayne Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 I have an audition tomorrow evening and I must say, I,m looking forward to it. Doing something very different from my regular work. Not that i,m arrogant, but I have learnt a lot in my years with my function band, and thank them for that, but, playing with such poor muscians (as I am) has made me want to seek something else. Having said that, I,m not quitting them yet, although the keyboardist is in the same boat as me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spongebob Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 Leave? +1000!! I left my last band earlier this year with nothing to go to. First time I'd ever done such a thing with nothing in place. Best thing I ever did....the band was stressful, getting nowhere (ie people not turning up, etc.) I'd started to hate the idea of even wasting my time being involved with it. Sloppy too! Had 12 weeks with a gap. Didn't rush, just got back into playing at home, jamming with decent records, etc. Actually made me want to get back out there, on my terms. Forward fast 5 months to today, still in the early days of a (so far) fun band. Look forward to meeting and playing, and now planning the diary for gigs and stuff. I've learnt one thing this year - if it starts to go sour, I'm out. And I wouldn't wait as long as last time either, trying to hope things will improve after the latest band chat. It didn't, and 9/10 wouldn't again! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discreet Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 Yes! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcnach Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 [quote name='Marvin' timestamp='1318398260' post='1401530'] I've read a couple of posts lately advising not to leave a band, even if it is a bad one, without having something else in place. Understandable advice, we all want to be out there strutting our stuff rather than being stuck trawling through JoinMyBand et al and the infinite number of 13yr old guitarists who only want to play Thrash and Doom. As someone who it would seem is about to jump ship, surely there comes a point where a band just doesn't work and you should walk away. In my case, band together 9 months. I've never been convinced we've 'worked' musically. We've only had four gigs, but 3 have been of what I consider a very low standard. After our last gig there was a very tense 'chat' about it and things were said, don't think I need go any further on that . Personally I was very annoyed to find out by chance that 2 members (our singer is off doing a mini tour with their other band) had cancelled practice this week and didn't have the manners to tell me. One of the reasons I've not jumped, is I read the posts about finding something else first.... [/quote] It depends. Does the band provide an income that you need? Then find something else first. Is the band mostly "fun"? By that I mean that it may produce an income, sometimes a nice one, but the revenue is surplus to needs and just goes on other fun activities, gear etc. In that case, walk. It's clearly not fun... and the time you spend on band-related issues is probably better spent looking for other bands and practicing new stuff. Walk out. I am in a good place right now, when it comes to bands and band members. It wasn't always that way. I firmly believe that a very important reason why I am happy right now is that I lost the fear to say "sorry, guys, this is not for me". I don't need to make a fuss, even if there is a reason to make a fuss, I prefer to be straight and keep things friendly enough. You never know who you run into and who their friends may be. You may end up finding the best band for you through someone who used to be in a band you hated, but because you were a decent enough guy, they actually spoke nicely about you, and you get the gig. Never underestimate the power of word of mouth. Also, as you try various bands etc, you increase the pool of people you know. Even if a band does not work out, some of their members may be ok for another project. The more people you know, and know about you, the better the chances to meet the right band members. But it can be a bit scary to walk out without having something else. I understand that. However, it can also feel very liberating. Try it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nick Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 (edited) Repeating some other comments, would say leave, life's too short. Done the same myself recently, with the soul band I was in, largely because they were murdering the songs I love! Enjoying being bandless again for the time being.... playing around & having fun being a bit of a bass slag! Edited October 29, 2011 by nick Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lfalex v1.1 Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 However... Dependent upon your other interests and commitments, you may wish to [i]plan[/i] the duration of any sabbatical. I (rightly) quit my last band,as 50% of them were not behaving sensibly. I now find that I have filled (or had filled for me) any spare time I had kept aside for rehearsals etc. I've had a look around various sites, but can't find anything that appeals to me. My old "network" of fellow musos has crumbled, as several have moved abroad and others quit/ had families/ gone off the rails completely. Worse still, so many venues have gone out of business that there's scarcely a stage left to play on in these parts. This in turn means the scene has all but collapsed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marvin Posted October 12, 2011 Author Share Posted October 12, 2011 I appear to have neglected my own thread It is difficult to turn your back on a band, sort of better the devil you know than the not having a devil at all. Finding a band is difficult enough, so sometimes we're inclined to try and make the best of a bad job. I've definitely found that whilst being in a band there seem to be more opportunities to form something new. Also I'm reluctant to be the one to make the first move, just looks like you're just a quitter. However, I've not been sitting around idly. I'm actively looking to put something new together. Quitting is just a question of when, and will be very much of my choosing Thanks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
algmusic Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 [quote name='Marvin' timestamp='1318457407' post='1402581'] I appear to have neglected my own thread It is difficult to turn your back on a band, sort of better the devil you know than the not having a devil at all. Finding a band is difficult enough, so sometimes we're inclined to try and make the best of a bad job. I've definitely found that whilst being in a band there seem to be more opportunities to form something new. Also I'm reluctant to be the one to make the first move, just looks like you're just a quitter. However, I've not been sitting around idly. I'm actively looking to put something new together. Quitting is just a question of when, and will be very much of my choosing Thanks [/quote] The sooner the better.. nothing worse than going to a practice, thinking ' what I'm I doing here ' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bozzie Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 I'd say walk away, I did when i was in a similar situation, never looked back. As BigRedX says taking time out from such a situation can be useful. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcnach Posted October 13, 2011 Share Posted October 13, 2011 You are not a quitter if you have given it a chance, and it sounds liek you have given it plenty of that. Besides... here's another take: if you are not happy, it must show... it's not unconceivable the rest will pick on it and have a chat and one day say "you know, I think we have to let you go". I have only been "let go" twice. The first one I was very fed up, and only stayed because I really liked the music and we were about to do some recording. I wanted to participate in the recording so that i could have something to show for that period, and listen back to the songs we made... and quit. A month before recording I was informed the band was disbanding, and the main two guys were carrying on alone to record all themselves. I was disappointed... but the recording sessions were so bad, they stopped talking to eachother halfway through and after that they never saw eachother again. It was going to happen, regardless. The second time, I was not fed up, but I could see it was a waste of time for me and was not happy (gave it 3 months). Then I had to cancel a rehearsal and we skipped another as another member was away... before we got to the third week I got an email: "we noticed you don't seem to really be enjoying this so we think it's probably better if we let you go and look again for another bass player". They were totally right, I was just annoyed I was not the one who quit Since then, I don't stay in bands when I don't believe in them... and I'm all the better for it. That's not being a quitter, not any more than when you leave a crap job or a bad relationship. It is not a happy moment when you do, but invariably you feel great after a little while Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebrig Posted October 13, 2011 Share Posted October 13, 2011 (edited) I left my band about six months ago, as the singer only thought he needed to show up every now and then, even though he was always singing verse's where chorus's should be, and visa-versa, and we hardly ever had everyone there for rehearsals, and the songs we were playing was awful IMO. I wasn't too sure that I was doing the right thing, as they did have more gigs lined up, and I really got a buzz out of playing live. Since leaving, I have jammed with many different musicians that I met through 'JoinMyBand', which has been both interesting and enjoyable. I now have a complete band formed, playing music that we ALL enjoy, we ALL get on well, and we ALL show up every week. Anyway, I got a call from my old band last week, asking whether I could help them out as their new bassist can't make a gig next week, so I said I would,but I would need a couple of rehearsals with them beforehand. So last week we all got together and I found out on the night, that there were quite a few new numbers that I had never even heard before, let alone played, so I said I will go away and work on them, and we can run through them at the final rehearsal tonight (Thursday), and guess what? I've just found out that the singer, and one of the guitarists wont be there tonight, so nothing has changed, and I'm sure glad I acted when I did, rather than just plod along with a bunch of guys, who have no dedication at all. Go with your instincts! I'm sure you will find a more satisfying band soon. Good Luck! Edited October 13, 2011 by thebrig Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marvin Posted October 13, 2011 Author Share Posted October 13, 2011 (edited) Well stone me! I wasn't expecting that! Although to be honest I'm not entirely surprised. OK, I'll tell Had a text from the guitarist this evening and he's jumped ship . That's that then. Thanks again everyone. EDIT: for schoolboy error Edited October 13, 2011 by Marvin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clarky Posted October 13, 2011 Share Posted October 13, 2011 No guilt. All good.Now you can get involved in something that really fires you up - and the experience with your now-previous band will stand you in good stead to make the right decisions Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marvin Posted October 13, 2011 Author Share Posted October 13, 2011 [quote name='Clarky' timestamp='1318543999' post='1403688'] No guilt. All good.Now you can get involved in something that really fires you up - and the experience with your now-previous band will stand you in good stead to make the right decisions [/quote] Cheers mate. As it happens (no Jimmy Saville impressions, stop it ) I met a drummer in t'pub this evening that I contacted a couple of days ago. That sounds rather seedy doesn't it... I digress, good bloke so who knows Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Vader Posted October 14, 2011 Share Posted October 14, 2011 [quote name='Marvin' timestamp='1318544152' post='1403690'] Cheers mate. As it happens (no Jimmy Saville impressions, stop it ) I met a drummer in t'pub this evening that I contacted a couple of days ago. That sounds rather seedy doesn't it... I digress, good bloke so who knows [/quote] Good luck mate, keep us posted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EdwardHimself Posted October 14, 2011 Share Posted October 14, 2011 [quote name='Marvin' timestamp='1318544152' post='1403690'] Cheers mate. As it happens (no Jimmy Saville impressions, stop it ) I met a drummer in t'pub this evening that I contacted a couple of days ago. That sounds rather seedy doesn't it... I digress, good bloke so who knows [/quote] gr8 news. See, that wasn't so hard was it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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