Irritating terms that non-musos use...

[Ian Savage]

My dad continually refers to guitar slides as 'sliders', which for some reason bugs the hell out of me...the singer in one of my bands used to term the bass drum the 'foot drum' ...and even though it's (I suppose) a legitimate contraction of 'plectrum', anyone using the word 'plek' for one p!sses me off.

Am I just getting cumudeonly in my old age, or has anyone else got pet hates like these?

[Hobbayne]

My friends little sister always used to refer to the neck of the guitar as 'The Handle'

[squire5]

Machine Heads instead of tuners.This may sound strange,but I have always thought that perhaps the machine head,ie the part of the guitar where the tuning machines go,and the headstock were one and the same.But how and why are tuners known as machine heads?

[discreet]

[quote name='Ian Savage' timestamp='1318444082' post='1402293']
the singer in one of my bands used to term the bass drum the 'foot drum'
[/quote]
D'you mean the kick drum?

[EdwardHimself]

[quote name='discreet' timestamp='1318445073' post='1402319'] D'you mean the kick drum? [/quote]

+1

[bremen]

[quote name='squire5' timestamp='1318445036' post='1402318']
Machine Heads instead of tuners.This may sound strange,but I have always thought that perhaps the machine head,ie the part of the guitar where the tuning machines go,and the headstock were one and the same.But how and why are tuners known as machine heads?
[/quote]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Machine_head

[gilmour]

Rift instead of Riff ! Grrrr

[LawrenceH]

[quote name='discreet' timestamp='1318445073' post='1402319']
D'you mean the kick drum?
[/quote]

Useful for sound engineers confronted with the typical rock line up. B is for bass, so we needed another letter for the bass drum...

[bremen]

[quote name='gilmour' timestamp='1318445272' post='1402329']
Rift instead of Riff ! Grrrr
[/quote]

Dobley stereo!

[Big_Stu]

Bloke I know pronounces bass as in the fish.

[retroman]

"Is that a lead guitar"?

[EssentialTension]

[quote name='discreet' timestamp='1318445073' post='1402319']
D'you mean the kick drum?
[/quote]

Another +1

[EssentialTension]

[quote name='squire5' timestamp='1318445036' post='1402318']
Machine Heads instead of tuners.This may sound strange,but I have always thought that perhaps the machine head,ie the part of the guitar where the tuning machines go,and the headstock were one and the same.But how and why are tuners known as machine heads?
[/quote]
I would often say machine heads, that's what they were always known as at one time.

[discreet]

[quote name='Ian Savage' timestamp='1318444082' post='1402293']
even though it's a legitimate contraction of 'plectrum', anyone using the word 'plek' for one p!sses me off.
[/quote]

D'you mean a pick?
Sorry.

[EssentialTension]

My old dad used to call anything with strings a banjo, so my bass was a banjo. Slightly more thrilling was his use of trumpet for anything that had to be blown, so my harmonica was a trumpet.

[xgsjx]

My Mrs calls the whammy bar (or tremolo arm) a "Wahwah Lever".

[discreet]

[quote name='Ian Savage' timestamp='1318444082' post='1402293']
My dad continually refers to guitar slides as 'sliders', which for some reason bugs the hell out of me.
[/quote]
D'you mean bottlenecks?
I'll get me coat.

[Ian Savage]

[quote name='discreet' timestamp='1318445073' post='1402319']
D'you mean the kick drum?
[/quote]


Ooooohhhhh, don't you start with that I DO actually have to use two separate terms for it, as 'proper' drummers get riled if you call it a kick drum in a 'discussion about drums' type context, but as I engineer as well I do indeed find myself calling it the kick drum a lot of the time.

Foot drum, though, is surely wrong in any context

[Ian Savage]

[quote name='discreet' timestamp='1318446130' post='1402351']
D'you mean bottlenecks?
I'll get me coat.
[/quote]

What about the brass/ceramic/steel ones that've never been near a bottle that I wasn't drinking out of then, eh? EH? Riddle me that...

[Slipperydick]

I think of a tuner as being a tight fitting tapered tuning peg, as opposed to a machine head, which has gears.

And I refer to practicing as 'Having a burst on me Banjo' Comes from Ken Dodd probably...(by jove I needed that)

yeah, you probably need to be 50 odd to understand it - a bit like 'Wheres me shert'

[Ed_S]

[quote name='Ian Savage' timestamp='1318444082' post='1402293']
...and even though it's (I suppose) a legitimate contraction of 'plectrum', anyone using the word 'plek' for one p!sses me off.
[/quote]

Yeah, that one annoys me. And people who write 'mike' when they mean 'mic'.

[ahpook]

"i f***ing love G, me ! "

[discreet]

[quote name='Slipperydick' timestamp='1318447022' post='1402375']
And I refer to practising as 'Having a burst on me Banjo'
[/quote]
So do I! Practise makes perfect!

[Ian Savage]

[quote name='Ed_S' timestamp='1318447039' post='1402376']

Yeah, that one annoys me. And people who write 'mike' when they mean 'mic'.
[/quote]

Oh yes, that one too. And someone really need to come up with an accepted standard for the verb describing when you place a microphone near something to pick up its sound - 'mic-ing'? Micing? The latter sounds too much like it's got something to do with rodents for my liking...

[hairyhaw]

My wife knows the difference between a bass and a guitar...however. I have a Sunburst Fender Jazzmaster - the wife calls it "The Brown Guitar". I also have an acoustic - the wife calls this "The Wooden Guitar".

I have pointed out many times that they're both made of wood.