Partners playing in your band?

[shizznit]

I have been in a band with sibling members and that can be stressful at times. Partners? Totally new experience for me. It could work out just fine and of course has every chance of not working out. I just don't want to mess the other guys about.

She brought up a good point a couple of weeks ago. With both us being in the band we both earn from it. As long as we can treat each other with professionalism it could be good for us financially as well as getting our musical kicks.

[leschirons]

Was in a band with my wife for about 6 months. Never a problem for us, or any other band members. We spoke to each other like normal bandmembers would, she'd give me the "eyebrow" along with the rest of them when I dropped a note or two and she, and all the others would get the same treatment.

As I say, never a problem but it totally depends on the couple, and attitude of the other members.

It's not obligatory that it has to go pear-shaped and if it works, it works so why not?

[Roger2611]

Our guitarist is married to our keyboard player, the marrige has survived 3 bands and 2 kids so far but when it all kicks off it's spectacular! the drummer and I insist that a pub is close to any rehearsal room or recording studio so we can escape the inpending carnage

[barneyg42]

[quote name='Marvin' timestamp='1360863525' post='1977628']
Worked with a band last year where the singer and guitarist were an item. A right royal PITA. Their personal problems would spill into band politics, so if they'd had an argument during the day/week/month that would manifest itself in an argument in the band. AND, they'd both bitch about each other behind the other one's back.
[/quote]

Opposite with us,(eventually) singer got the band together and for some reason she butted heads with the guitard to the point he was going to leave (this was early days of band) They sorted themselves out, became an item, had a baby last year (called Marshall!!) and became engaged yesterday (valentines awww) when he went down on one knee, his good one I guess! They never seem to bring any problems to the band which is either a decision they have made or genuinely they don't argue to that extent. I think I'd better get over to the Playing at your own Wedding thread to get some advice for them!!!

Edited February 15, 2013 by barneyg42

[fumps]

IT all depends on the relationship you have, years ago I was mates with a couple who was in the same band (She was a drummer & he was a guitarist). At first they argued & after a while they noticed that some of the arguments were not band related, they were issues that came from their normal life & was brought into the band situation.
Once they realised this they agreed that it was not fair to do that as there are other band members who are giving their time up & it's not fair on them. from then on they had a strict "What happens in practice & band time stays there" And it worked pretty well for them.

I personally would not do it simply because I think it's healthy to have time apart from your other half & being in a band is a great opportunity to do this. But that my opinion anyway

[Toddy]

Works for us, go for it.

[Stacker]

Never experienced a partner/wife/GF being brought in but a relationship developed between the guitarist and one of the two female front vocalists. They kept it quiet for a few months but then we began to see a united front being present on points of discussion and an attempt to direct the band. They eventually vamoosed, thinking they could go it alone, and vanished into the ether. Several slightly similar sceanrios developed in bands I was in over the years. Given all that, it was something I always watched out for.

[tauzero]

[quote name='seashell' timestamp='1360849517' post='1977329']
But then again, I have acted in plays and musicals with married couples before and no problem. Added to which I believe there are some BC members who are in bands with their other halves. For instance tauzero I think? So maybe they will come along to this thread and advise us!
[/quote]

Yes, of the five bands I'm in, Mrs Zero is in three - one of them being a duo. We're comfortable with being able to criticise each other's playing/singing just as much as criticising/being criticised by other band members. In one of the bands that Mrs Zero isn't in, the drummer and keyboard player are husband and wife, and that hasn't caused any issues. In the ceilidh band, we have two married couples - our melodeon player can be a pain at times and her husband is something of a lightning conductor when that happens as he's normally first in the firing line.