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Outstanding! An all-original Deeply-Weird WTF!!!


Happy Jack
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Deeply-Weird were the musical instruments subsidiary of Vospers Thornycroft. They're chiefly remembered these days for their use of depleted uranium pickups, but perhaps more significant was their introduction of steam turbines to passive 4-string basses.

The WTF model was superseded by the LOL, which offered an optional side-car with mounting ring for a Lewis Gun, but these were found to perform poorly in pubs with low ceilings.

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[quote name='Happy Jack' timestamp='1361715779' post='1989633']
The WTF model was superseded by the LOL, which offered an optional side-car with mounting ring for a Lewis Gun, but these were found to perform poorly in pubs with low ceilings.
[/quote]

Don't forget the early and very rare OMG, which was (for the time) a very lightweight pedal-powered one-string bass of wrought iron, intended for orphans and nursing mothers. Later models were fitted with a leather sackbut harness, but it never really caught on and was eventually discontinued in 1875.

Edited by discreet
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Unfortunately the pioneering ideas embodied in the OMG were never developed. Instead, Deeply-Weird (or, more accurately, Lord Ranulf Ernle Plunkett Thistleton Thistleton Deeply-Weird) decided to embark on the notorious "bells & whistles" project, leading ultimately - some would say "inevitably" - to the ludicrously expensive IOU model:

Edited by Happy Jack
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[quote name='Happy Jack' timestamp='1361719543' post='1989742']
Unfortunately the pioneering ideas embodied in the OMG were never developed...
[size=4][/quote][/size]
Yes, the OMG principle could have shortened bass history by many years. Below: Dr Arthur Spatula's 'Amplifying Engine' (a precursor to the modern bass pre-amp) provided a 'tone' so remarkable that men were often seen to weep after hearing it.

Unfortunately it was deemed impractical for gigging purposes as it weighed seven tons. Only three 'Spatulas' were ever made - two of them being installed in British pre-electric recording studios powered by orgone accumulators. [size=4]The third went missing at sea under mysterious circumstances aboard a Mail Steamer bound for Melbourne and was never recovered.[/size]

[size=4][/size]

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Seeing that photo reminds me that Deeply-Weird's grandfather, Ignatz, became obsessed at an early age by the way in which industrial looms in Bradford were controlled by a series of "punched cards". These were fed into the loom in such a way as to control which strings were operated by the shuttle.

Ignatz was probably the first person in this country to realise that controlling which bass strings were to be plucked would be appallingly difficult using this new technology.

He spent much of his adult life proving exactly this, and died entirely vindicated, having failed entirely ever to successfully play [i]Smoke On The Water[/i] with this system.

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I believe they also produced a model for the Irish market, called the "Jaysus". Due to the lack of success they were re-branded and handed out with Happy Meals as the "Piece-o-crap" painted in Ronald McDonalds signature Yellow with a red Pickguard.

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[quote name='discreet' timestamp='1361720661' post='1989770']
[/size]
Yes, the OMG principle could have shortened bass history by many years. Below: Dr Arthur Spatula's 'Amplifying Engine' (a precursor to the modern bass pre-amp) provided a 'tone' so remarkable that men were often seen to weep after hearing it.

Unfortunately it was deemed impractical for gigging purposes as it weighed seven tons. Only three 'Spatulas' were ever made - two of them being installed in British pre-electric recording studios powered by orgone accumulators. [size=4]The third went missing at sea under mysterious circumstances aboard a Mail Steamer bound for Melbourne and was never recovered.[/size]

[size=4][/size]
[/quote]

What kind of amplifying engine is best for metal?

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[quote name='yorks5stringer' timestamp='1361804028' post='1991101']
Just riffing on the "built in cable"..how cool would it be to have a built in cable in Basses that rewound rather like on a cylinder vacuum cleaner? You could have a 30' cable and wander all around the stage!
Just need to work how it would all fit in the control cavity......
[/quote]

Could be like one of those retractable dog leads. When the singer's had enough of the bassist snurfling audience members' arses he pushes a button and - pertwanggg! you're back on the stage.

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[quote name='yorks5stringer' timestamp='1361804028' post='1991101']
Just riffing on the "built in cable"..how cool would it be to have a built in cable in Basses that rewound rather like on a cylinder vacuum cleaner?
[/quote]

Just comping on your riff, I get a Tom & Jerry image of an over-enthusiastic bass player suddenly getting yanked off his feet and disappearing stage left ...

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