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Leaving a band - any advice gratefully received


GregBass
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Hi all
OK - I suspect that most of us have been through this at one time or another. I have just left a band that I had helped to start, and had been with through (a few) good times and (many) bad for two years. I told them that I would do the two remaining gigs for this year (the low gig rate was the main reason for my leaving) and they have just contacted me to take me up. That's no problem.

They are a rock covers band with a current set of 21 numbers, and last night they auditioned for my replacement. Because of holidays, they had not rehearsed for a while and realised just how rusty they have become. So - here's the crunch. They want me to go along to three rehearsals before the gig - essentially to help them brush up on songs that I feel I already know. I feel disinclined to do this. They have already auditioned for my replacement, and only need this rehearsal because their own holiday schedule is stopping them from staying tight as a band. I feel that's their problem - I will happily turn up knowing my parts and having all my vocal harmonies in place. The rest is up to them.

Am I being unreasonable? The rehearsal room is 30 miles from my home, making it bloody inconvenient!

Cheers

Greg

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Having been in a similar (but not identical) position, I would offer to do one rehearsal with the new person also present, and if the band think they need more, they can use the opportunity to get the new bod up to speed. I try never to burn bridges if I'm on my way out - I even supplied my last successor with tab for as many of the songs as I could!

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So many variables, about which we know nothing.

Top of my list would be: Are these people who practise on their own between rehearsals, or who only practise AT rehearsals? (I've played with both types as, I'm sure, have most of us.)

If they all practise on their own, then three rehearsals seems to be excessive to simply get back up to speed as a unit.

If they only practise at rehearsals, then ONE rehearsal seems excessive. Let them sort themselves out.

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Thanks for the rapid advice guys. They are (mostly) decent guys, and one rehearsal wouldn't be a problem. I think their plan is to have a rehearsal, then a three week break while the singer goes on a visit to Australia, then cram in two quick practises before the gig. Personally I would be happy to stretch to the two just before the gig - but if they have gone rusty in the last three weeks then I can't see the benefit of rehearsing before another three week break. I'll keep you informed .....

Edited by GregBass
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[quote name='Jonnyboy Rotten' timestamp='1377877635' post='2193178']
If they need/want you to do more practise sessions than you are comfortable doing you can always ask for petrol money to cover your cost of getting there.
[/quote]

Agreed ... in principle.

In practice, you might feel a bit of a tosser asking your recently-ex-bandmates for cash before you're prepared to rehearse with them.

Just saying ...

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Seems to me that if these guys got off their arses and did something like gigged more, they wouldn't need the rehearsals and you might not be
leaving.
Since you have made your decision and agreed to help them fulfil dates, then that is the extent of your obligations as far as I can see.
It isn't down to you to make them better rehearsed...that is what their new guy should be doing.

If it isn't convenient then tell them exactly that... I don't see why you should fall out over it, you have other priorities
or things to do. If that means you suit yourself, then so be it.

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I left a band back in May that I had seen "evolve" over time, and whilst I liked the people they were never going to be "my thing". I had ambition, they were more a pottering band concerned more with rehearsing than gigging (not a bad thing if that's what everyone is signed up to).

I told them I was leaving and committed into doing 3 gigs we had in the diary, I also offered help in finding a new bassist. However, whilst I offered assistance to the new bassist, I didn't attend practices after I had "handed in my notice" so to speak.

I do firmly believe in not burning bridges though, which has worked for me, as one band that never got off the ground has, by association, got us a backing singer. I also had a blast with another band following a recommendation by a former guitarist I'd worked with.

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