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really pissed off with my band


artisan
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my band "the growlers" just never seem to do anything.we've been going for 14 years & whilst we used to play on a regular bassis the vocalist & the drummer just don't seem to give a damn any more.we practice once a blue moon & as for gigs we've only played 4 this year.
when the band play we are a damn good band, but it's just extremely hard work getting it to happen.
my brother is the lead guitarist & him & me are always keen to play + modesty aside,we're both accomplished musicians,where as the drummer & vocalist just don't want to put any effort into it & neither of them are very musicaly giffted to be honest.but as a whole when it gels it really gels.
if we sack both of them the band just won't be the same so i feel it would be the end of "the growlers" for good-which would be a shame,but its so damn frustrating i'm thinking of throwing in the towel & sod 'em.
which brings me to my dilema-
do i bin it & start again or try to keep it going (its been crap for 4-5 years so it won't change)& hope for a miracle.

sorry for rambling (not to mention my bad grammar & spelling)
art' :)

Edited by artisan
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I'd suggest you keep it going but advertise and start another band with your brother on the side - initially to see what happens - it sounds like the Growlers isn't taking up much of your time at the mo.

You'll probably find you gel with other people, and it will either kick your vocalist and drummer up the @rse or completely kill off the Growlers as they don't like what you've done, or wanted to finish anyway.

At least you'll know for sure, and you could end up with 2 bands worth of musicians that you can pick a "supergroup" from if two gets to be too much!

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You sound like a monkey with his hand is a sweet jar, afraid to let go of what you have even though you can' t enjoy it.

If The Growlers have a local rep, you may be able to poach a singer and drummer from someone else and get your mojo back. Ambivalence is difficult to counter and life's probably too short to try.

Ditch the deadweights and start again.

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Nothing more frustrating than being in a band where the other members don't have the same level of commitment as yourself. It's happened to me numerous times over the years and I have always found honesty to be the best policy. If I was in your position I would tell them exactly what I wanted to do and what I expected from them in terms of commitment. Then if they disagree you have a choice to either compromise or stick to your guns and search out players who will commit as much as yourself

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wow! i've been in virtually the same situation for what seems like forever, but in reality its way less time than you've been putting up with it (6 years or so). major pain in the ass isn't it?! me and my lead guitarist brother have now decided to forget the idea of getting a singer and just do what we can ourselves. which just leaves a drummer...

funny what you say about it wouldn't be the same band without the other two, cuz i've always felt like that about our drummer (singers have come and gone) but now that i think about it, it makes sense to continue the band and get someone new cuz we were always the driving force behind it anyway and as good as our drummer was/is i'd have swapped him in a second for a little effort and enthusiasm!

i vote replace them but keep the band name etc if you think its worth keeping hold of the reputation you've built over the years, chucking it all away for the sake of it not being the same when in fact it might be, or might be way better seems a real hassle.

well thats the angle i'm trying this time anyways!

good luck!

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Similar deal with my former main gig. The main gig got less and less attention after one of us went 'pro'. Everybody kind of slipped into other projects through deps/contacts eventually. I was really bitter for a while (particularly since the 'pro' gig was a lazy-arsed MOR guitareoke setup with backing tapes and almost zero musical effort needed).

*thinks* [i]Do I still sound bitter[/i]?. It felt that 15 years of tight musicianship and equally tight friendship was dissolving before my very eyes.

As with splitting up any relationship, it gets better with time, and I now really look forward to and enjoy our occasional reunions (about once every 3 months). I also enjoy the stuff I mainly do now, which I couldn't have done without the former gig and its attendant hassles.

So I'd stick with it and think about where you need to focus your mojo now...

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thanks for all the replies guys much appreciated.
i'm going for a pint with my brov' this evening to have chat about it,i'll let you know the out come.
i reckon we'll probably take all of your advice i.e. new band on the side & see how it goes.
thanks a million guys.

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[quote name='bilbo230763' post='222293' date='Jun 19 2008, 04:35 PM']You sound like a monkey with his hand is a sweet jar, afraid to let go of what you have even though you can' t enjoy it.[/quote]
perfect
hammer--nail--head
you described me to a tee :)

cheers Bilbo

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I'd sack it for the time being and give a reason.

Isn't playing music all about having fun and tapping into the creative side of your lives?. We all - at different stages in our lives - have bad times and good times to put up with. And we all need a release.

Music. Songwriting. Playing bass. Buying basses. Changing effects. Looking at other people's gear. Making contact. Making contacts....

All these things are why we do what we do. Whether they're a hobby or pay the mortgage.

The beauty of being able to play an instrument is that you will always have a connection with someone. But never let it ruin your relationships - personal or otherwise - because of it.

I've been through countless bands with countless musicians. Some good. Some bad. Some terrible. Yet the relationships have remained.

Have a short break. Be nice and tell them why. Then come back to it when you're ready.

That's my 2p

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Tell me about it. Grrrrr.

We only do the occasional gig, so when we get one we need plenty of practise to knock everything into shape. We were due to be playing the 5th July in the local pub, and consequently were due to be rehearsing last night and this afternoon (this would have been the last practise before the gig).

Last night rang the drummer and the singer up at about 7.30 asking where they were. Apparently they were in the local pub (1/2 mile away, but 'Didn't feel in the mood'. Guitarist tried to ring the drummer this morning about todays practise to be told that he'd gone out and it wasn't known when he'd back!

Tis complicated by the fact that the drummer is the guitarists brother, but even the guitarist has had enough of it.
This isn't the first time he's messed us about, but I'm determined that it will be the last.

Anyway I'm hoping that myself the keys/sax and the guitarists can find another drummer (we have someone in mind), and another singer from somewhere, and get a new band together. It rather hinges on whether the guitarist is up for it, obviously a more difficult decision for him as it's his brother.

The sad thing is that I quite like both the drummer and the singer, and they are both very good at what they do, but as band members they are just a pain.

So, my thoughts for you would be knock it on the head and move on! However I'm very pissed off at the moment, so I wouldn't take any notice of me. I jus wanted to vent my speen a bit and this thread seemed a good place to do it.

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I'm always bitching about our drummer and guitarist for one reason or another...

Our drummer just lacks commitment and everything else in his life comes before the band. And he lacks imagination and a good ear when it comes to original material. We're trying to find a suitable replacement...

Our guitarist in naturally talented but lacks any musical knowledge. This means that he's always trying to reinvent the wheel and being a bit bolshi he always wants it his way which make life hard for everyone else. When recording he always wants to lay his track down first and insists that's the way it's done despite never having been in another band, let alone recorded anything. The rest of us know better and after trying it his way to prove him wrong and why it doesn't work we end up doing it the right way. However, he forgets all to easy and next time the script is the same. In addition he's always trying to be clever when composing... sometimes different and unusual is good but sometimes keeping something simple sounds better... He's trying to be unpredictable but if you do it every time then that in itself becomes predictable...

Artistic differences always cause problems and it's just a matter of chossing your battles and making compromise... :)

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:) thanks for all the replies,seems i'm not the only one in this situation.

after much thought & pints of Tetleys we've decided to do what most of you kind people suggested i.e. form another band & keep the growlers ticking over for the occasional gig.

hope those of you in similar bands get sorted too.

cheers guys & gals :huh:
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  • 3 weeks later...

just a little update, "the growlers" has now ceased to exist.
we haven't played together for 6 weeks & are supposed to be playing "the blues bar" in harrogate next friday.
our singer has just told me he can't practice with us as he's too busy with his scout group ! enough is enough.
so sod it me & my brother will form a new band & start again.

"the growlers" r.i.p.

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