BetaFunk Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 [quote name='John Cellario' timestamp='1391785652' post='2361287'] The End. [/quote] That was by far the best bit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diablo Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 Is anyone going to tell Gary Moore not to pull faces while playing - ? I think not! Rules are for wimps - do your own thing. If the bar is empty when you open your eyes, don't try that particular thing again! I learned a lesson last night as stand-in bass at a gig. Don't try to play a song that you've never heard, never rehearsed and only have half the guitar chords for. It went okay with me making it up as I went along until I ran off the end of the notes page and realised there must me a page 2. Doh! Cue several bars of "jazz style" meanderings until I worked out were the band were. By "Jazz style" I mean playing the wrong notes, but my pulling a "nice" face I hope it looked like I did it on purpose Cheers, Rich Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigRedX Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 (edited) The Terrortones breaking rules 2, 3 and 5, and not giving a f***... And although he's not in this photo, our guitarist at that time was playing a Strat. Edited February 8, 2014 by BigRedX Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thisnameistaken Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 [quote name='Diablo' timestamp='1391854128' post='2361959'] Is anyone going to tell Gary Moore not to pull faces while playing - ? I think not![/quote] You'd have to shout pretty loud for him to hear you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davidpike Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 Well I laughed. And I play a 5, a 6[b][i] and[/i][/b] a fretless. Not at the same time, you understand. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cytania Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 OMG I think I have 'moose antler's! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thisnameistaken Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 You have tradesman's apostrophe's too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cytania Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 Proud to be a tradesman! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spinynorman Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 The problem is, if the guitarist isn't allowed a Strat, what is he going to play? A Les Paul? A Telecaster? Some out-of-fashion super-strat? Have a heart, it's like telling the bass player he mustn't play a Precision. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimR Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 [quote name='spinynorman' timestamp='1391895453' post='2362488'] ... Have a heart, it's like telling the bass player he mustn't play a Precision. [/quote] That's rule 5iv Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cat Burrito Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 [quote name='Happy Jack' timestamp='1391789237' post='2361343'] Nothing wrong with saying hello to the town where you're playing: "Hey! Feltham! Good t'be hyah!".[/quote] I'm always up for that too. I kind of agree with the rest although I can live with strats (I'm ducking for cover now) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lojo Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 I just googled the author of the article and couldn't find a single link or piece of information as to who he is or what he has ever done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lee4 Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 Rule 14. You shall gurn,bob at the knees,nod the head or make other facial contortions and/or bodily movements that give even the most casual of viewer the impression that you are enjoying what you are doing. And if you're not enjoying it,f**k off and find something better to do. This rule replaces the OP's rule 10. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigRedX Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 [quote name='spinynorman' timestamp='1391895453' post='2362488'] The problem is, if the guitarist isn't allowed a Strat, what is he going to play? A Les Paul? A Telecaster? Some out-of-fashion super-strat? Have a heart, it's like telling the bass player he mustn't play a Precision. [/quote] There's loads more guitar designs than the ones you've mentioned. for starters how about: Firebird, 335, anything with a Gretch logo on it, anything with a Mosrite logo on it? [IMG]http://i114.photobucket.com/albums/n249/BigRedX/Bass/HallmarkWingbat.jpg[/IMG] [IMG]http://i114.photobucket.com/albums/n249/BigRedX/Bass/HohnerTEXIICustom.jpg[/IMG] [IMG]http://i114.photobucket.com/albums/n249/BigRedX/Bass/GusG1Vibrato.jpg[/IMG] [IMG]http://i114.photobucket.com/albums/n249/BigRedX/Bass/FretkingEspritVCustom.jpg[/IMG] [IMG]http://i114.photobucket.com/albums/n249/BigRedX/Bass/TokaiTalboJr.jpg[/IMG] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seashell Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 [quote name='lee4' timestamp='1391957507' post='2362955'] Rule 14. You shall gurn,bob at the knees,nod the head or make other facial contortions and/or bodily movements that give even the most casual of viewer the impression that you are enjoying what you are doing. And if you're not enjoying it,f**k off and find something better to do. This rule replaces the OP's rule 10. [/quote] Knee bobbing. I rather like that. I once saw a guitarist do this combined with a sort of chicken pecking head nod. And on the last beat of the bar he sort of kicked his leg out at the back. It was wonderful to behold. If I can ever perfect that move I shall be very happy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lee4 Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 At a band-mates recent 50th birthday gig,I looked like a chicken doing a Bez from the Happy Mondays impersonation. I feel no shame about it either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seashell Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 [quote name='lee4' timestamp='1391976076' post='2363219'] At a band-mates recent 50th birthday gig,I looked like a chicken doing a Bez from the Happy Mondays impersonation. I feel no shame about it either. [/quote] I bet it looked foul! (Someone stop me now, please!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cytania Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 The Batmobile guitar is amazing BigRedX! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lonestar Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 (edited) [quote name='Dave Vader' timestamp='1391786992' post='2361316'] With all due respect, this is utter bullshit. Of the highest order. Probably written by some twat in a terrible pub covers band who has a horrible shiny 7-string Ibanez guitar, can't play lead solos for toffee and has a gut like Jabbas. Or not. He should say, "If you are not a dull shoe-gazey indie muppet, you should't be in a band" or "Don't form a band". [/quote] Calm down it's only satire ! It is in fact from a humorous book by an American writer ( music journo?)which I was given for Christmas a few years ago and was called the Rock Bible or something. I cant believe that anyone ever intended these to be taken seriously although judging by the vitriolic response of some of the humourless miserable gits on here and facebook the irony got lost somewhere mid Atlantic. It made me smile anyway. edit:http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Rock-Bible-Scriptures-Bands/dp/1594742693 Edited February 9, 2014 by lonestar Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigRedX Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 (edited) [quote name='cytania' timestamp='1391978568' post='2363263'] The Batmobile guitar is amazing BigRedX! [/quote] Thanks! Limited edition of 100, endorsed by George Barris who designed the 60s TV Batmobile. It's a really good instrument too! I particularly like the fact it only has two controls - volume and a switch that does nothing except turn on the LEDs in the "exhaust"! [IMG]http://i114.photobucket.com/albums/n249/BigRedX/DSC03082.jpg[/IMG] Edited February 9, 2014 by BigRedX Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diablo Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 Post #39 gets my vote for the "worst looking guitars of all time ever mentioned in the same post" award. Man they are bad. If a guitarist turned up to play with one of those I'd personally use it to beat them with. Cheers, Rich Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigRedX Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 [quote name='Diablo' timestamp='1391986709' post='2363391'] Post #39 gets my vote for the "worst looking guitars of all time ever mentioned in the same post" award. Man they are bad. If a guitarist turned up to play with one of those I'd personally use it to beat them with. Cheers, Rich [/quote] You're so vanilla... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MiltyG565 Posted February 10, 2014 Share Posted February 10, 2014 I break every one of those rules at the same time - I guess I'm a massive douchebag... Alright lads, don't all rush at once to disagree Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MiltyG565 Posted February 10, 2014 Share Posted February 10, 2014 [quote name='BigRedX' timestamp='1391971446' post='2363153'] There's loads more guitar designs than the ones you've mentioned. for starters how about: Firebird, 335, anything with a Gretch logo on it, anything with a Mosrite logo on it? [/quote] Nope - if the drummer can't have scaffolding on his drums, you can't have it on your guitar Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimR Posted February 10, 2014 Share Posted February 10, 2014 [quote name='lonestar' timestamp='1391978617' post='2363265'] Calm down it's only satire ! It is in fact from a humorous book by an American writer ( music journo?)which I was given for Christmas a few years ago and was called the Rock Bible or something. I cant believe that anyone ever intended these to be taken seriously although judging by the vitriolic response of some of the humourless miserable gits on here and facebook the irony got lost somewhere mid Atlantic. It made me smile anyway. edit:http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Rock-Bible-Scriptures-Bands/dp/1594742693 [/quote] Unless they're being just as ironic. I suppose if you were to take it seriously, at least if your band confirms to all those old tired rock band cliches, be aware that they're tired cliches and revel in the fact. For god sake don't think you're being edgy unless you've taken that cliche to new levels like Mr Venom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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