Weststarx Posted June 19, 2015 Share Posted June 19, 2015 Hi Guys, We've just booked a gig for next week due to a cancellation but been warned by the band that cancelled that there is always one lady that goes every week and likes to heckle the bands. Personally I have never had anyone heckle me in any band I've been in, so I'm a little unsure how to deal with it! Apparently her favourite line is "Get on with it!" in between songs. Any advice on how to cleverly deal with a heckler? Thanks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RhysP Posted June 19, 2015 Share Posted June 19, 2015 If she can't put any more effort into her heckling than "get on with it" I'd just ignore her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discreet Posted June 19, 2015 Share Posted June 19, 2015 [quote name='Weststarx' timestamp='1434749793' post='2802614'] Apparently her favourite line is "Get on with it!" in between songs. Any advice on how to cleverly deal with a heckler? [/quote] In this case, practice leaving only a second or two between songs. Otherwise say something obliquely insulting such as, 'Mum, I told you not to come to our gigs any more!'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ambient Posted June 19, 2015 Share Posted June 19, 2015 When you think she's about to start and shout, you turn to the band and do it ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weststarx Posted June 19, 2015 Author Share Posted June 19, 2015 [quote name='discreet' timestamp='1434750061' post='2802619'] In this case, practice leaving only a second or two between songs. Otherwise say something obliquely insulting such as, 'Mum, I told you not to come to our gigs any more!'. [/quote] Haha or refer to her as 'Grandma' that would be killer! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fretmeister Posted June 19, 2015 Share Posted June 19, 2015 "I was going to do a world class impression of a fat old hag. But someone's beaten me to it." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smaz Posted June 19, 2015 Share Posted June 19, 2015 A gig I recently played, we were being not so much heckled but interrupted, some guy had had too much to drink & was being a bit of a tit. Someone shouted to start playing, so we couldn't hear him anymore. The heckler then tried to grab the mic during the next song - an audience member promptly grabbed it off him, put it back & said to his face, in no uncertain terms, 'F*** OFF.'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discreet Posted June 19, 2015 Share Posted June 19, 2015 [quote name='Weststarx' timestamp='1434751318' post='2802632'] Haha or refer to her as 'Grandma' that would be killer! [/quote] Well my mum is getting on for 80, but whatever works for you... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gjones Posted June 19, 2015 Share Posted June 19, 2015 I once played a gig in a big, crowded, sweaty, venue, where after each song a woman shouted, 'you're sh*t, you're sh*t!'. Eventually, after about 4 or 5 songs the singer had enough and shouted back, 'Well if you think we're sh*t f*** off then!' to which she replied 'Oh I wasn't calling you sh*t'. Who she was calling sh*t, we never found out? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weststarx Posted June 19, 2015 Author Share Posted June 19, 2015 (edited) [quote name='discreet' timestamp='1434752694' post='2802649'] Well my mum is getting on for 80, but whatever works for you... [/quote] Ah well I'm 22! Thanks for these suggestions guys, keep em coming so I have an arsenal of comebacks should I ever need them ahah! Edited June 19, 2015 by Weststarx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discreet Posted June 19, 2015 Share Posted June 19, 2015 [quote name='RhysP' timestamp='1434749963' post='2802616'] If she can't put any more effort into her heckling than "get on with it" I'd just ignore her. [/quote] Ignoring hecklers is usually the best policy. If they're really ruining the gig, you could try focusing the room's attention on them - when they lose their anonymity that's often enough to freak them out into silence. Obviously bands don't like heckers, but audiences don't like them either and will very much be on your side. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LayDownThaFunk Posted June 19, 2015 Share Posted June 19, 2015 Spit on them and announce it's the 70s. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xgsjx Posted June 19, 2015 Share Posted June 19, 2015 I'd do the opposite. Instead of trying to heckle back, build a rapport with her. We had a lady who was being a bit irritating. Singer invited her onstage & gave her a dance, then handed her maracas to play for the rest of the song. We then took a short break (to make sure she didn't keep playing) & she enjoyed the rest of the set. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lozz196 Posted June 19, 2015 Share Posted June 19, 2015 Not playing in Milton Keynes are you, Weststarx? That`s a popular heckle up there. To be honest, if that`s all someone is doing, ignore it, or strike up a rapport with the audience saying something like "she loves us she does, can`t wait for more". Or you could decide within the band that you`ll accept her doing this 3 times, but once she`s done that, immediately after the next song, as soon as you`ve finished, everyone in the band who has a mic shouts "get on with it" as loudly as they can. Then give her a knowing look, you`ve got more volume than she`ll ever have. We`re quite lucky in our band, we dedicate a song to anyone who heckles, as we have one called W*nker. Invariably the rest of the audience join in and said heckler looks rather upset. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcnach Posted June 20, 2015 Share Posted June 20, 2015 [quote name='Weststarx' timestamp='1434749793' post='2802614'] Hi Guys, We've just booked a gig for next week due to a cancellation but been warned by the band that cancelled that there is always one lady that goes every week and likes to heckle the bands. Personally I have never had anyone heckle me in any band I've been in, so I'm a little unsure how to deal with it! Apparently her favourite line is "Get on with it!" in between songs. Any advice on how to cleverly deal with a heckler? Thanks [/quote] if that's all she does... ignore her. But, perhaps she has a point? Don't spend too long between songs, avoid silences and don't talk too much... really, get on with it Maybe that other band does all that! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geddys nose Posted June 20, 2015 Share Posted June 20, 2015 http://www.insults.net/html/everyday/hecklers.html Funniest one I heard was a Chubby Brown one when he was getting a load of abuse at a gig- "I could have been your Father if that Alsation had not got there first" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lurksalot Posted June 20, 2015 Share Posted June 20, 2015 write a song called 'get on with it' , every time she shouts it , play a few bars , by the end of the gig it will either be a good laugh or someone will have been kicked out, either you the the heckler Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Norris Posted June 20, 2015 Share Posted June 20, 2015 [quote name='lurksalot' timestamp='1434782455' post='2802724'] write a song called 'get on with it' , every time she shouts it , play a few bars , by the end of the gig it will either be a good laugh or someone will have been kicked out, either you the the heckler [/quote] Beat me to it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy Jack Posted June 20, 2015 Share Posted June 20, 2015 Or ask her if she means Get It On and suffers from dyslexia. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lowdown Posted June 20, 2015 Share Posted June 20, 2015 [quote name='Weststarx' timestamp='1434749793' post='2802614'] Apparently her favourite line is "Get on with it!" in between songs. [/quote] That's not heckling, she is just giving good old fashion professional advice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skej21 Posted June 20, 2015 Share Posted June 20, 2015 (edited) Wait until she shouts and then play the next song at double tempo. If she calls it between every song, your set will be over in 30 minutes, pick up the money and get an early night. You're just giving the punters what they asked for, after all ;-) Edited June 20, 2015 by skej21 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
landwomble Posted June 20, 2015 Share Posted June 20, 2015 "I don't come round to your place of work and slap the sailor's c*cks out of your mouth, do I? Let me do my job" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Truckstop Posted June 20, 2015 Share Posted June 20, 2015 In a big booming voice, respond with "YES! GET ON WITH IT!!!!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spacey Posted June 20, 2015 Share Posted June 20, 2015 She might have a point. You ever watched a band where the guitarists tunes his guitar every song with a floor tuner whilst the band stand around waiting ? Buy a guitar that stays in tune dude ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discreet Posted June 20, 2015 Share Posted June 20, 2015 (edited) [quote name='spacey' timestamp='1434800341' post='2802897'] She might have a point. [/quote] Most bands I see spend far too long faffing about between songs. One band I was in picked up on this and allowed only a few seconds between songs, no tuning up, no discussions, no standing around looking like you don't know where you are. It's easy to do and makes you look a LOT more professional. Edited June 20, 2015 by discreet Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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