lojo Posted October 11, 2015 Share Posted October 11, 2015 Every band is different just as every relationship is , but rules aside it's either for your or not. I'd be happy to be in a band where I have no input , but I'd have to love what I'm being told to do, if I didn't I'd feel as you do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kevvo66 Posted October 11, 2015 Author Share Posted October 11, 2015 (edited) All the bands not that many but 3 or four I've played in over the years I've had input but these were all bands that performed their own material with the odd cover thrown in for good measure ,mmm maybe it time I just kicked back and take the money😗 Edited October 11, 2015 by kevvo66 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CHW Posted October 11, 2015 Share Posted October 11, 2015 I've been there as a bass player and as a guitarist, it's one of those tough band relationships things. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the boy Posted October 12, 2015 Share Posted October 12, 2015 [quote name='cameltoe' timestamp='1444428744' post='2883290'] Any band is only as good as their rhythm section. Seriously. If Jeff Buckley's drummer had been sh1t no one would have batted an eyelid. And for the record- no ones listening! [/quote] Are you sure about that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toneknob Posted October 12, 2015 Share Posted October 12, 2015 Get it agreed that you take it in turns to write the setlist. If they make any funny business about that or mess about with the set on your night, sling your hook. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrDaveTheBass Posted October 12, 2015 Share Posted October 12, 2015 If you're an amateur like me, the main thing about being in a band is that it's got to be fun. You might get a bit of petrol money at the end of the night from a pub gig, but if you're not making enough to live on, then your enjoyment and satisfaction is the only thing that's important. There's always going to have to be some give and take when you're in a band, but if all you ever do is give, and all everyone else does is take, that's not a compromise - that's called taking the p1ss. I've just left a similar situation. I'd stuck with them for over a year, but finally realised that all I ever got from them was lip-service. In hindsight, I should have been more concerned when I joined about all of their tales of woe about their long list of bass players who were forever leaving and letting them down. Unfortunately the egos involved are so large, and their self awareness so small, that I doubt that they'll ever realise that it's them who are the common denominator. I had a jam the other day with friends that I hadn't seen for years. It made me realise that I knew guitarists, drummers, singers even! , who were also lovely people. Just because you want to be in a band, it doesn't mean you have to be in a band with a load of a55holes. Life is short. If you're not having fun, walk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slipperydick Posted October 12, 2015 Share Posted October 12, 2015 Can be dificult dealing with female band members, no matter how much they are 'one of the lads' they think and react differently. Try talking to the guitar player in front of the others, if you cant get his attention kick him in the bollox and just quit, lifes too short to be doing something your not enjoying, and once communication has broken down beyond a certain point, you aint gonna get the respect back. You'll just hurt yourself trying. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4-string-thing Posted October 12, 2015 Share Posted October 12, 2015 Agreed, life really is too short to be doing something you're supposed to be enjoying but you're not! Years ago I joined a band in the Nuneaton area, who seemed to revel in the fact that they had got through 15 bass players. Needless to say, it wasn't long before I walked (the band leader was a complete t*ssp*t) they're still going but the lineup is completely different and they're probably on bass player 38 by now! And by all accounts, the guy is still a complete t*ssp*t.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrDaveTheBass Posted October 12, 2015 Share Posted October 12, 2015 Hmm, I'm staring to suspect that I may have been bass player #37! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4-string-thing Posted October 12, 2015 Share Posted October 12, 2015 [quote name='MrDaveTheBass' timestamp='1444660528' post='2884856'] Hmm, I'm staring to suspect that I may have been bass player #37! [/quote] No names, no pack drill but if it's a "folk-rock" band led by a bodrhan player, it's the same one! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BILL POSTERS Posted October 12, 2015 Share Posted October 12, 2015 (edited) [quote name='4-string-thing' timestamp='1444659569' post='2884847'] Agreed, life really is too short to be doing something you're supposed to be enjoying but you're not! Years ago I joined a band in the Nuneaton area, who seemed to revel in the fact that they had got through 15 bass players. Needless to say, it wasn't long before I walked (the band leader was a complete t*ssp*t) they're still going but the lineup is completely different and they're probably on bass player 38 by now! And by all accounts, the guy is still a complete t*ssp*t.... [/quote] Were they all drunks in their 50s and from atherstone way by any chance ? Edited October 12, 2015 by BILL POSTERS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4-string-thing Posted October 12, 2015 Share Posted October 12, 2015 [quote name='BILL POSTERS' timestamp='1444669690' post='2884961'] Were they all drunks in their 50s and from atherstone way by any chance ? [/quote] Not when I was with them, we used to rehearse in Coventry.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmedunc Posted October 12, 2015 Share Posted October 12, 2015 (edited) Well of course, we have it tough. I love playing with the lads (come on, you know what I mean) in the band. We all love what we do and have a laugh doing so. We take the mick out of each other all the time but compliments are the norm. If somebody has a gripe it's always valid but not always acted upon but nobody involved takes it to heart too much. Most of the band have done good things in the past and politically we are an unlikely combination. We all sort of have found people we can play with and not have all the negatives we used to have in forder bands. It's a breath of fresh air that's lasted a good few years now. Life is far too short for spending time around other musicians that have a conflicting outlook... Edited October 12, 2015 by itsmedunc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaulWarning Posted October 12, 2015 Share Posted October 12, 2015 sometimes you have to fight your corner, causes upsets at the time but in the long run they'll listen to you more, if it doesn't work you've lost nothing you were quitting anyway. Was watching a programme on BBC4 the other night about bands falling apart, someone said "the trouble is bands never ever talk to each other about what's pissing them off" and it's true Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrDaveTheBass Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 [quote name='4-string-thing' timestamp='1444667650' post='2884933'] No names, no pack drill but if it's a "folk-rock" band led by a bodrhan player, it's the same one! [/quote] That's not the band that I've recently left, but if it's the band that I think it is, then I was bass-player #1! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nicko Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 If the vocalist is not listening you're not speaking the right language. I recently got accused of being ill because I said I didn't want to offend anyone. They know I offend everyone so they don't take it personally, but at least when I'm blunt there is no room for misunderstanding. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KevB Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 (edited) Well I think I made have made a bit of a breakthrough. I mentioned at last rehearsal I thought the set order didn't flow as well as it might but really it was down to how comfortable the singer was doing too many of the more 'challenging' songs back to back, hence he should be final arbiter but i gave him some pointers. Bless him he's just sent a revised set list to us all taking some of these points on board and it looks better to me, real test will be gigging it obviously. I was beginning to think I was talking to myself at times. Edited October 13, 2015 by KevB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4-string-thing Posted October 13, 2015 Share Posted October 13, 2015 [quote name='MrDaveTheBass' timestamp='1444723669' post='2885264'] That's not the band that I've recently left, but if it's the band that I think it is, then I was bass-player #1! [/quote] Haha..... And why did you leave? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrDaveTheBass Posted October 14, 2015 Share Posted October 14, 2015 To be honest, I didn't have a problem with any of the band members (at the time it was just the bodhran player, a fiddle player and me). I was just getting back into playing after a 10 year break, and was really looking for a pub-rock outfit. The folky thing was interesting, but I was struggling to fit bass-lines in with the bodhran and no proper drummer. We rehearsed a coupke of times, but I never gigged with them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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