ahpook Posted June 13, 2016 Posted June 13, 2016 (edited) [quote name='EssentialTension' timestamp='1465800200' post='3070977'] Stay with that band for social reasons and join another one too for musical reasons. First date in the diary gets your attention. [/quote] Exactly. If you leave your current band and the new lot turn out to have bum berets then you may have lost some buddies and you're still in a band you don't like. There's nothing like the look of a few irons glowing gently in the fire Edited June 13, 2016 by ahpook Quote
JapanAxe Posted June 13, 2016 Posted June 13, 2016 [color=#282828][font=helvetica, arial, sans-serif]Great slogan there![/font][/color] Quote
BottomE Posted June 13, 2016 Posted June 13, 2016 If you're in it for the social side of things stick with what you know. If, as you say its "hacking you off", you need to move on. Try and exit in a nice way (they may need a dep in future) and in the words of Adam and the Ants "do yourself a favour". Quote
Dandelion Posted June 13, 2016 Author Posted June 13, 2016 Mmmm much food for thought. Gonna make a few enquiries. Thanks chaps. Quote
Ashweb Posted June 13, 2016 Posted June 13, 2016 [quote name='discreet' timestamp='1465854908' post='3071687'] Bum berets?? [/quote] Surely I wasn't the only one to read this and think '[url="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ed53AgvOqE0"]The Rubettes[/url]'? I'll get me coat.... Quote
zbd1960 Posted June 13, 2016 Posted June 13, 2016 For your musical sanity, you need to be playing with a group that gives you a sense of satisfaction/achievement, otherwise it becomes and chore and will lead to resentment. When I started (on a different instrument) about 5 years ago, I joined a community band. It was good training and experinece, but after 4 years, I decided it was time to move on. You can say you want to move on and explore new avenues and remain sociable with the old team. Quote
blue Posted June 14, 2016 Posted June 14, 2016 (edited) [quote name='hiram.k.hackenbacker' timestamp='1465838506' post='3071458'] Erm, I'm no mathematician.... [/quote] The band has been together for 11 years. I've been with them for the past 6 years. Blue Edited June 14, 2016 by blue Quote
lojo Posted June 14, 2016 Posted June 14, 2016 Leave, but do it well , give notice and say you'll stay until a new player who fits in and is up to speed. Quote
Dan Dare Posted June 14, 2016 Posted June 14, 2016 (edited) As others suggest, you could stick with current band for the social/fun side and do something more satisfying too. Have you actually tried saying to the current band "love you dearly, chaps, but cannot carry on like this". Might wake them up to the need to improve. Or are they a lost cause? Edited June 14, 2016 by Dan Dare Quote
Dad3353 Posted June 14, 2016 Posted June 14, 2016 [quote name='hiram.k.hackenbacker' timestamp='1465900577' post='3071920']... I presume the previous bass player(s) didn't "shape up" then? [/quote] ... or died of old age..? Quote
discreet Posted June 14, 2016 Posted June 14, 2016 (edited) [quote name='Dad3353' timestamp='1465901974' post='3071935'] ... or died of old age..? [/quote] I think the euphemism is 'passed on through natural causes'. Or as I like to say, 'gone tits-up'. Edited June 14, 2016 by discreet Quote
Dad3353 Posted June 14, 2016 Posted June 14, 2016 [quote name='discreet' timestamp='1465902667' post='3071943'] I think the euphemism is 'passed on through natural causes'. Or as I like to say, 'gone tits-up'. [/quote] Euphemisms are all very well, but sometimes a direct kick up the rear is the best ploy, or so I'm told. Quote
blue Posted June 14, 2016 Posted June 14, 2016 [quote name='hiram.k.hackenbacker' timestamp='1465900577' post='3071920'] Ah, it was the affirmative form in the first instance that confused me. I presume the previous bass player(s) didn't "shape up" then? [/quote] I believe the band was headed in a different direction at the time and he was no longer a match for the band. Somehow I was, after 3 auditions I was offered the job. Blue Quote
blue Posted June 14, 2016 Posted June 14, 2016 [quote name='Dad3353' timestamp='1465901974' post='3071935'] ... or died of old age..? [/quote] I think he was my age, but no, it wasn't an age issue, more that he wasn't on track with the direction of the band, Blue Quote
fretmeister Posted June 14, 2016 Posted June 14, 2016 Are they being loyal to you by getting better? No? Quote
ahpook Posted June 14, 2016 Posted June 14, 2016 [quote name='discreet' timestamp='1465854908' post='3071687'] Bum berets?? [/quote] Ass hat ? Bum beret ? Maybe..... Quote
blue Posted June 14, 2016 Posted June 14, 2016 (edited) [quote name='hiram.k.hackenbacker' timestamp='1465900577' post='3071920'] Ah, it was the affirmative form in the first instance that confused me. I presume the previous bass player(s) didn't "shape up" then? [/quote] I think in most cases when guys are relieved from duty it's mutual. Blue Edited June 18, 2016 by blue Quote
LayDownThaFunk Posted June 15, 2016 Posted June 15, 2016 Wouldn't the people in the band become your friends even if you didn't know them before? Unless they were utter arseholes... Quote
blue Posted June 15, 2016 Posted June 15, 2016 [quote name='LayDownThaFunk' timestamp='1465983604' post='3072552'] Wouldn't the people in the band become your friends even if you didn't know them before? Unless they were utter arseholes... [/quote] Maybe Blue Quote
RockfordStone Posted June 15, 2016 Posted June 15, 2016 [quote name='Dad3353' timestamp='1465901974' post='3071935'] ... or died of old age..? [/quote] perhaps he didn't want to do it for money anymore, so now he is in a basement somewhere Quote
thepurpleblob Posted June 15, 2016 Posted June 15, 2016 My rule is always play with people who are better than myself.... or to flip it around, never have to apologise for your band mates. Nothing is stopping you remaining mates. Quote
yorks5stringer Posted June 16, 2016 Posted June 16, 2016 Speaking of euphemisms, is this one? [attachment=221639:Euphonium-842S.jpg] Quote
TimR Posted June 18, 2016 Posted June 18, 2016 (edited) [quote name='ahpook' timestamp='1465935451' post='3072309'] Ass hat ? Bum beret ? Maybe..... [/quote] Hemorrhoids. Bum berries. . Edited June 18, 2016 by TimR Quote
SpondonBassed Posted June 19, 2016 Posted June 19, 2016 [quote name='Dandelion' timestamp='1465775849' post='3070938'] But then should I stay with them. I really am in too minds. Can't sleep. [/quote] I think that has to be regarded as an occupational hazard if music is your occupation (paid or unpaid). Me? I'd make every effort to honour the band's commitments but make no further ones. It's honest, up-front and if it is taken badly, your mates are not quite up to scratch in terms of mutual respect. Good luck either way but if you have the time maybe an overlapping commitment may work for all concerned, just until you decide where you want to lay your hat, be it an ass-hat or flat-cap or any other choice in headgear. Quote
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