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Reasons For Not Joining A Band


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Time, or rather not having enough free to devote to the project.

Personality clashes, and the realisation that having to spend hours together in rehearsal rooms, tour buses, on stage will certainly result in serious bodily harm at some stage.

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Just didn't feel right.

Everything was OK with the communications, I pulled up outside the meet up having learned all the tunes. But there was something wrong I couldn't put my finger on.

When I actually met the guitarist nothing clicked. He didn't actually offer me the gig anyway so that was academic, but I'm just not sure I would have accepted.

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Auditioned for a band, where the songs they asked me to learn were:
Jamiroquai - Canned Heat, Otis Redding - Hard to Handle, Abba -Gimme Gimme Gimme & Curtis Mayfield - Move on up
Thought it was a really good selection of songs, enjoyed learning them so i was really keen to impress.
Got offered to join the band, said yes, and then they gave me their set list...... Dakota, sex on fire, brown eyed girl...... :blink: :(
Nothing wrong with these songs but going by the songs they asked me audition, i didn't expect their set list to consist of the "standard" tunes it was.
My fault i suppose, never assume!

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Sometimes it's just better to do your own thing, given how cheap, easy, and of a high standard home production can be, these days.

No creative compromise, no travel, no personality clashes, no being let down by the failings of others, no being held to doing anything at inconvenient times, etc, etc, etc ...

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[quote name='Fionn' timestamp='1468912426' post='3094183']
Sometimes it's just better to do your own thing, given how cheap, easy, and of a high standard home production can be, these days.

No creative compromise, no travel, no personality clashes, no being let down by the failings of others, no being held to doing anything at inconvenient times, etc, etc, etc ...
[/quote]
I guess this is also why you get "bands" in pubs these days consisting of 1 guitarist and a tambourine wielding singer, with a backing recording of drum and bass. (Or pre-set drum machine)

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Other than a friend's function band I stopped bothering with being in a gigging band, playing pubs, festival etc,long ago. Replying to musician wanted ads never worked for me. For me, it's most important I'm mates with other band members. I'm also much more into electronic stuff whereby a couple of you is enough.

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[quote name='RhysP' timestamp='1468916839' post='3094219']
The other members wanting the band to be a big socialising/friends thing when all I want to do is play some music & then go home.
[/quote]

I could come up with all kinds of reasons, but this is at the heart of it.

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[quote name='RhysP' timestamp='1468916839' post='3094219']
The other members wanting the band to be a big socialising/friends thing when all I want to do is play some music & then go home.
[/quote]
[quote name='Trueno' timestamp='1468919222' post='3094246']
I could come up with all kinds of reasons, but this is at the heart of it.
[/quote]

Doesn't this view depend really on how this starts?

What I mean by this is this: There are 2 ways you can be mates in a band:

1 - Mates first, band develops out of friendship - then the social scene is good. You have loads on common.

2 - Band happens, then you start to socialise - then the social gatherings are only really band-meetings, because it's all you have in common, unless you MAKE it go to another level.

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[quote name='Grangur' timestamp='1468919647' post='3094252']

Doesn't this view depend really on how this starts?

What I mean by this is this: There are 2 ways you can be mates in a band:

1 - Mates first, band develops out of friendship - then the social scene is good. You have loads on common.

2 - Band happens, then you start to socialise - then the social gatherings are only really band-meetings, because it's all you have in common, unless you MAKE it go to another level.
[/quote]

In the past I've answered "bass player wanted" ads where I've been told that I would be expected to socialise regularly with the rest of them. The last band I joined actually started talking about all getting together with our wives/girlfriends at each others houses for meals on a regular basis before we'd played a note.

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[quote name='RhysP' timestamp='1468922480' post='3094275']
In the past I've answered "bass player wanted" ads where I've been told that I would be expected to socialise regularly with the rest of them. The last band I joined actually started talking about all getting together with our wives/girlfriends at each others houses for meals on a regular basis before we'd played a note.
[/quote]
My response to this would be dependent on who they are. I'd probably be up for a meal at each others homes. Suggestions of darts-nights at the pub on a random week night would kill my interest.

I know, I'm a snob.

I once got a call from a drummer who wanted to get together as a start of a band. We'd never met. She was 70 and a female drummer. This raised my curiosity. She was all for booking a studio. I suggested simply a meet down a local pub.

This lady turned up in skinny jeans, lacey ankle socks, bright make-up and large ear-rings. Her hair was in a long pony-tail. This would have been ok, maybe, but she also was missing most of her hair on top and most of her teeth. She was clearly trans. I don't normally have a problem with any LGBT etc. I've shared an office with a trans, but you have to feel comfortable to be friends, or to feel it acceptable to stand on a stage with them.

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