OK, this is a possibly weird question about gigging...

[TimR]

Yes. I wouldn't want my wife to come to a gig out of a sense of duty, there would be no point. I like an appreciative audience who want to be there to see the band.

My wife doesn't like the type of music the band, I'm currently in, plays.

[dlloyd]

[quote name='mcnach' timestamp='1490697515' post='3267101']
You consider your band work too?

I don't know anybody who has a day job that call their band 'work'. Yes, it may bring in extra cash which is great and all that, but calling it a job just seems a bit of... 'over-hype' to me.
It may be for you, I don't know! It's just I was reading on TB about something a week or two ago and this kept coming with people talking about their band stuff as 'work' in a manner that didn't seem to fit their largely weekend warrior (and often just one weekend a month) reality. Nothing wrong with weekend warriors, at all, by the way. I just think that it sounds a little bit cringeworthy.
[/quote]

Good question. It's not my main earner. But it (plus other bands) is the main income for a couple of members of the band. I try to treat it with the same level of professionalism as I would treat my main job. I'm not sure why that would make you cringe. I enjoy my day job equally as much as I enjoy gigging... maybe it's that?

[chris_b]

Why "work"?

One of the things that separates the good bands from the OK, or not so OK, bands is how they present themselves and behave on stage.

How many times do you see a band end a number then stand around having a drink (a fag in the old days) and a chat before deciding what number to play next?

If you're going out for a laugh with your mates and have some fun then that can lead to a very amateurish performance. If you approach gigs with a professional frame of mind then the band will usually look and play better. Work is just a short-hand for ensuring a better performance.

[blue]

[quote name='mcnach' timestamp='1490697515' post='3267101']


You consider your band work too?

I don't know anybody who has a day job that call their band 'work'. Yes, it may bring in extra cash which is great and all that, but calling it a job just seems a bit of... 'over-hype' to me.
It may be for you, I don't know! It's just I was reading on TB about something a week or two ago and this kept coming with people talking about their band stuff as 'work' in a manner that didn't seem to fit their largely weekend warrior (and often just one weekend a month) reality. Nothing wrong with weekend warriors, at all, by the way. I just think that it sounds a little bit cringeworthy.
[/quote]

I consider it work, a 4 hour shift. I don't have a regular 9-5, by choice.

It's a fun 4 hour shift, but I still consider it going to work.

Blue

[blue]

[quote name='chris_b' timestamp='1490711218' post='3267278']
Why "work"?

One of the things that separates the good bands from the OK, or not so OK, bands is how they present themselves and behave on stage.

How many times do you see a band end a number then stand around having a drink (a fag in the old days) and a chat before deciding what number to play next?

If you're going out for a laugh with your mates and have some fun then that can lead to a very amateurish performance. If you approach gigs with a professional frame of mind then the band will usually look and play better. Work is just a short-hand for ensuring a better performance.
[/quote]

Exactly!

Agreed.

Blue

[mcnach]

[quote name='dlloyd' timestamp='1490709479' post='3267249']
Good question. It's not my main earner. But it (plus other bands) is the main income for a couple of members of the band. I try to treat it with the same level of professionalism as I would treat my main job. I'm not sure why that would make you cringe. I enjoy my day job equally as much as I enjoy gigging... maybe it's that?
[/quote]

No, I guess saying 'cringeworthy' without further qualification is just not fair. I was referring to people who act as if their being in a band made them superior to most other mortals, that kind of thing most people grow out of by the time they're 15 So no, I certainly didn't mean a 'professional' attitude is cringeworthy. Not at all.
My main band is 'fun'. At first it cost us more than it produced, now it produces more than it costs... but I could not quit my day job.
I have played in other bands where the main objective was making money and at least a member depended on it to pay his bills in addition to some teaching work etc... I can see that as being 'work', even if it's fun. Fun or not has nothing to do with it being work.
But if it provides only 5% of your income with the rest coming from a 'day job' and you talk about people interfering with it as interfering with your work, it just sounds a bit ridiculous. That's the kind of scenario I was alluding to.

Professional attitude should come by default whatever the band. If someone is paying you to play a fee yo have agreed to, then you have to behave with professionalism whether it's a dive bar, a festival or the Royal Albert Hall.

[mcnach]

[quote name='blue' timestamp='1490720192' post='3267379']
I consider it work, a 4 hour shift. I don't have a regular 9-5, by choice.

It's a fun 4 hour shift, but I still consider it going to work.

Blue
[/quote]

It *is* your work, no doubt! It pays your bills. The fact that it's fun is a bonus... or, perhaps more appropriately, a sign that you chose well

[mcnach]

[quote name='chris_b' timestamp='1490711218' post='3267278']
Why "work"?

One of the things that separates the good bands from the OK, or not so OK, bands is how they present themselves and behave on stage.

How many times do you see a band end a number then stand around having a drink (a fag in the old days) and a chat before deciding what number to play next?

If you're going out for a laugh with your mates and have some fun then that can lead to a very amateurish performance. If you approach gigs with a professional frame of mind then the band will usually look and play better. Work is just a short-hand for ensuring a better performance.
[/quote]

I'd agree about the professionalism side of things. There are some gigs where a looser attitude is ok, in others not so much, but I agree with treating them seriously. It doesn't mean they're less fun for that. But I guess I just don't call it work if the income it generates is not a substantial way to pay my bills.

The whole 'work' comment came from hearing people acting a little superior based on the fact that they get paid to play, when they do it once or twice a month for not much $$$, as if that were something special... and call it work to legitimise spending time away from their families.

If I have a family who is not happy because I am rarely at home between my day job, rehearsals and a saturday gig every other week... I can argue, if I felt the need, that it's something I need to do to be happy. But I would not dream of complaining they're interfering with my work. That's what I was going about.

[dlloyd]

[quote name='mcnach' timestamp='1490724071' post='3267435']

No, I guess saying 'cringeworthy' without further qualification is just not fair. I was referring to people who act as if their being in a band made them superior to most other mortals, that kind of thing most people grow out of by the time they're 15 So no, I certainly didn't mean a 'professional' attitude is cringeworthy. Not at all.
My main band is 'fun'. At first it cost us more than it produced, now it produces more than it costs... but I could not quit my day job.
I have played in other bands where the main objective was making money and at least a member depended on it to pay his bills in addition to some teaching work etc... I can see that as being 'work', even if it's fun. Fun or not has nothing to do with it being work.
But if it provides only 5% of your income with the rest coming from a 'day job' and you talk about people interfering with it as interfering with your work, it just sounds a bit ridiculous. That's the kind of scenario I was alluding to.
[/quote]

Okay, I think we're broadly on the same wavelength.


I think a better criterion for whether a band is a job or a hobby is whether HMRC would take an interest in you, were they to hear how much you earn from your hobby.

[TimR]

Being in a band is work. Whether you get paid for it or not. You are producing a service with your labour. No discussion. Whether you see it as difficult or hard work is another thing entirely. But it is work.

[Mykesbass]

My wife is very happy for me to go off gigging and has no interest in sitting in a pub not really knowing anyone, listening to music she really doesn't like.

Funny though, I'd love to get into a band that plays the sort of thing she likes, and I'm always on the lookout for a punky folky Levellers type thing, but to no avail!

[Telebass]

[quote name='TimR' timestamp='1490732526' post='3267552']
Being in a band is work. Whether you get paid for it or not. You are producing a service with your labour. No discussion. Whether you see it as difficult or hard work is another thing entirely. But it is work.
[/quote]
Yup.

[mcnach]

[quote name='TimR' timestamp='1490732526' post='3267552']
Being in a band is work. Whether you get paid for it or not. You are producing a service with your labour. No discussion. Whether you see it as difficult or hard work is another thing entirely. But it is work.
[/quote]

I could agree, I suppose.

But I'd still think the guy telling his wife to stop moaning about the time he spends away with his music endeavours because "it's work" is being pretty ridiculous [1].
That is completely separated from whether his wife has a point or not, which depends entirely on each situation.

[1] in that 2-gig a month band that rehearses weekly.

[blue]

[quote name='mcnach' timestamp='1490724136' post='3267436']


It *is* your work, no doubt! It pays your bills. The fact that it's fun is a bonus... or, perhaps more appropriately, a sign that you chose well
[/quote]

35 years 9-5ing it was enough for me.How I lasted 35 years, I'll never know, I hated it.

Life is to short, now I can "honestly" say I love my job.

Blue

Edited March 28, 2017 by blue

[TimR]

[quote name='mcnach' timestamp='1490735223' post='3267589']


I could agree, I suppose.

But I'd still think the guy telling his wife to stop moaning about the time he spends away with his music endeavours because "it's work" is being pretty ridiculous [1].
That is completely separated from whether his wife has a point or not, which depends entirely on each situation.

[1] in that 2-gig a month band that rehearses weekly.
[/quote]

It depends how much he makes from those two gigs and how much of it he gives to her. Assuming she is sat at home alone on the Saturdays when he is out working.

When I worked New Years eves, and they were hard work that paid reasonably well, on New Year's Day I'd take the family out for a meal to compensate. They wouldn't have gone out on NYE partying anyway and we'd all have been home watching TV, so it was only compensation in the loosest of terms.

[12stringbassist]

My wife used to come to a lot of my gigs in the early days of us seeing each other, because weekends were our only time together and I was always gigging. Now we've been married for years on end, she has to be dragged into the pub next to us to watch me play.

Everyone's different, but I imagine following you round 8 nights a month hearing the same stuff would get too much for anyone. It can be her 'me time'.

Edited March 29, 2017 by 12stringbassist

[blue]

[quote name='12stringbassist' timestamp='1490750440' post='3267685']
My wife used to come to a lot of my gigs in the early days of us seeing each other, because weekends were our only time together and I was always gigging. Now we've been married for years on end, she has to be dragged into the pub next to us to watch me play.

Everyone's different, but I imagine following you round 8 nights a month hearing the same stuff would get too much for anyone. It can be her 'me time'.
[/quote]

Agreed, me I'm single with no girl friend by choice. The whole relationship thing, not a good match for me. I'm not much fun.

And over here, who wants to sit through a 4 hour night in a bar.

Blue

[bazzbass]

[quote name='Dan Dare' timestamp='1490638742' post='3266705']
My missus used to come to the occasional gig when she was alive, but only if it was a special or unusual occasion. I wouldn't have gone to see her teach at the uni' where she worked, so why would she have wanted to come and see me at work?
[/quote]

firstly, sorry to hear of your loss, my ex died too, ten years ago

about watching people at work, I used to go watch my female housemate at her work all the time. Nothing weird in watching her work.

oh, did I mention she was a stripper?

great days, stripper parties at home lol

[blue]

[quote name='thebrig' timestamp='1490641235' post='3266732']
Because going to watch someone in an everyday job [u]would[/u] be unusual, but surely what we do when gigging falls into the entertainment category, which is why it might appeal to some partners to come and watch us play.[/quote]

Not for 4 hours.

Blue

[TimR]

Watching the same band playing the same tunes over and over again?

Who would want to do that?

[Bilbo]

My wife hates Jazz. The last time she came to a gig was about three years ago when I played with Jason Rebello. She sat at a table outside and talked to her fried all the way through. Didn't see a second of the gig.

[mcnach]

[quote name='blue' timestamp='1490735807' post='3267596']
35 years 9-5ing it was enough for me.How I lasted 35 years, I'll never know, I hated it.

Life is to short, now I can "honestly" say I love my job.

Blue
[/quote]


With a girlfriend that has said multiple times that she'd be happy to be the only 9-5er and let me take time to get into music full time (starting with a lot more practice and proper study etc), the notion is tempting. But I can't shake the feeling that if I did it full time I would end up resenting a lot of it. I'm one of those guys who love the stage time and I'm ok with a bit of the hanging about and networking bit... but the long waits kill me. Last summer I had a series of 'mini-tours' (and that's an overstatements, it was just 3 days at a time over a number of weeks), in a van, sleeping wherever, a gig every night, sometimes two. I had a great time... but most of the day was spent doing nothing. And drinking. I don't normally drink a lot, but I do like beer... and there was little else to do where we were, and free beer was hard to resist, just sitting around, chatting, snoozing, going for a walk...
The waiting, being away from my bed too often... I can see myself hating it pretty soon.
There are some bands around here playing weddings etc who make good money but they mostly just play weekends so they end up supplementing during the week a bit. That usually does not require a lot of time away from home.

I don't know, I think I am one of those guys who the minute you tell them "you HAVE to do X", will automatically hate X

Hmmm.

How long have you been away from the 9-5 life?

[mcnach]

[quote name='TimR' timestamp='1490739802' post='3267638']
It depends how much he makes from those two gigs and how much of it he gives to her. Assuming she is sat at home alone on the Saturdays when he is out working.

When I worked New Years eves, and they were hard work that paid reasonably well, on New Year's Day I'd take the family out for a meal to compensate. They wouldn't have gone out on NYE partying anyway and we'd all have been home watching TV, so it was only compensation in the loosest of terms.
[/quote]


Yeah, but that NYE gig is a one off.
It was similar with me. My gf didn't love the fact I had a gig that day, despite neither of us being big on partying on that night but she loves being out for the fireworks etc. The money was good and we managed to run out of the venue for the fireworks, and get back in time to play again... then we used the cash on ourselves (partially, I also had a bass purchase in mind... although I went off the idea in the end).

This summer coming, I already made a mistake
Her birthday is on a Sunday. I got offered a good gig on the Saturday and accepted, because in my mind it wasn't her birthday, right? Of course, afterwards I realised "dang, but it's the weekend, we'd normally do something... argh, she's very nice and understanding but I bet she'll be disappointed". This was a gig in Nuneaton. I am in Edinburgh. Lots of travelling.

I enquired at what time we would finish and whether they plan to drive the van straight back or stay overnight. Because I might just drive myself to ensure I'm back on Sunday morning. That's when I realised my mistake was twofold. There was another gig on the Sunday about 50 miles away from the first, which paid much better, so 'we' were staying for the night, play that gig (festival at 3pm) and then drive home.

For a minute I saw my head on a stake made from the neck of my favourite bass.

The way I saved it is by turning it into a miniholiday. I'll drive my car with her. We will not hang out as much with the band as I would normally (they're great guys and my gf loves them, so spending some time together is nice anyway), explore a bit duriing the day, play the gigs at night, and then take an extra couple of days for us. There are a couple of places that we can go from there, and if the weather is good (August) we can do some nice cycling, go to the beach... In the end I'd make zero money probably once I factor in the travelling and hotel costs... but I hope we'll have a good time.

I blocked out that weekend in my calendar for the next two years already so that this doesn't happen again

So yeah... it's got to be balanced. But guys, don't ever forget your girlfriend's birthday

[barneyg42]

[quote name='bazztard' timestamp='1490756843' post='3267689']


firstly, sorry to hear of your loss, my ex died too, ten years ago

about watching people at work, I used to go watch my female housemate at her work all the time. Nothing weird in watching her work.

oh, did I mention she was a stripper?

great days, stripper parties at home lol
[/quote]

Of course you invited all your mates round............

didn't you??

[shug]

I don't get it. I love what I do but I wouldn't want to see us 50 or 60 times a year. Once in a while if it's a special occasion with a social element, sure, but every gig? Nah...