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Venues You Don't Want To Play Anymore


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An Irish pub in town. Had to set up at 7pm and then hang around to play 11-2. Even though we are in no way even close to an Irish band we were TOLD to play a couple of traditional folk songs. The clincher though was the threatening atmosphere - from the landlady and bar staff! The crowd were fine

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A folk club up north. I don't want to be too specific. It's a function room at the back of a pub. One guy who's been playing in bands all his life runs this night called an "acoustic club". He books acts from out of town (us being one) as though it's a gig. I believe there's a fee but I don't get involved in that side of things. Anyway, it's just an open mic, he gets his mates to play a few songs each, some are good, some are crap, then puts the band on at 10, asks you to play until 11:30, then asks you to leave your gear on stage while his mates play some more open mic. There's only ever 20 people in there at the most

It's probably worthwhile - I'm sure we sell albums and merch etc. but it's just a bit soul destroying.

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Weve had one like that and although it makes humours conversation, at the time we were all shitting our selves and worried about getting the gear out in one piece. At the end of the night I was speedily carring out my cabs when they suddenly left my hands and lifted into the air. " I'll give you a hand wiv these" said a 6foot 3 mountain of a brickshithouse scaffolder with blood still soaked on his tshirt and hands. "err, yeah thanks, thats great, my cars just here, umm yeah, thats fine ,just there, ta..." He puts them in the back of my car, tells me its "a fackin really excellent band n that" then waltzes back to the back door and continues to get involved in the umptinth fight of the evening. Where I and the band would like to go through to get the rest of our gear.
Oh the fun.
Main reasons we wont go back to a venue are...
The acoustics are so bad its hopless.
There is one that couldn't draw punters in even if they offered free drinks due to poor location.
Previous reputations they cant shake off.
Usual crowd prefer a different vibe to what we offer.

Edited by bassjim
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we used to play at the worst pub in the worst part of the city's worst night spots

sometimes at really weird times, like we'd come on as the main band of two, at two am....on a Tuesday night lol.

I used to wonder how he can afford to pay us

turned out to be a front for our city's biggest heroin dealer, so even though hardly anyone watched the bands in the back room, as long as he was open he had a steady flow of customers coming and going, we had no idea lol we just wanted to play

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A couple, for different reasons: one's an Irish pub in Manchester City centre - it's a long narrow building, the space at the back is just where they've moved the tables and benches to either side to give a very small amount of space. The kicker is the bogs are at the back, just behind you, so you have to leave a walkspace right up the middle through the band (drummer to one side). We did it one Paddy's Day as a trio, and it was...colourful: we went on about five, and most of the punters had been in since eleven, there was a bloke selling packets of meat out of a Tesco bag, and despite having a fairly long Irish set, we were constantly moaned at for not knowing 'My Grandmother's Pig From Tralee' or some other obscure request. One bloke went for a slash seven times in the first set...I started counting after his third visit. As he stumbled through us for the seventh time, our singer told everyone we'd be donating some of the fee to the Prostate Awareness charities...not a titter... <_<

The other is a wedding 'venue' up on the tops North of Manchester - it's basically a converted barn: straw in the floor, you can see outside through the gaps in the walls - and their db meter is on the stage, set to Gnat's Fart. Our drummer, a girl on this occasion, not a big hitter, hit her snare once, just as she'd set up, and off it went. OK, brushes, then...woop, the kick set it off, too. This is without any of us plugged in. It was freezing bloody cold (they had two of those jet heaters on the floor) and overall a miserable experience.

Oh, and the Social club we played in Scunthorpe, the gig venue is upstairs, a tortuous route up (and bizarrely down) too many flights of stairs, a crowd like Burton's window. Worst bit is the pub below turns into a club later on, so getting out was a nightmare, picking past the bodies littering the stairs, and through a crowd of complete arseholes outside...

I've never actually minded playing dives as such, never really had too much mither. I probably spent too much time in them as a kid... :)

Weddings can be a bit lairy, mostly with drunk bridesmaids under the impression that they're Beyonce, but again, yer actual fisticuffs is rare IME...

Edited by Muzz
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[quote name='PaulGibsonBass' timestamp='1495692513' post='3305830']
Yes it was. A pity, because it's a good venue.
[/quote]
I think it changed hand a year or so ago didn't it, when it became rebranded as the "King Billy Rock Bar". My lad has played there numerous times, including since the change, but I don't think I've been there since (as a punter).

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There's a place in Bracknell called The Cellar Bar; it's in a complex called South Hill Park a stately home-cum-arts centre. The location is great, even though it's in Bracknell, it has a big/modern theatre and the little block to th bottom right of the photo below houses a great little recording studio. Nestled undereath all this is a myriad of ancient service corridors and the aforementioned Cellar Bar. I should just say the load-in is awful; the main doors are a bit of a schlep from the car parking, the doors are a pain in the butt, there's a narrow steep staircase, more doors. Load out is equally bad, but you're more tired.

I've played there maybe a dozen times, different bands etc. They do live music a couple of nights a week, but nothing is ever promoted and once or twice, we've been on the support card here with three or four bands and there's been one or two people in. It could be so good; it has a great PA, it's loud and tight, but it just doesn't work. No one seems to care about live music in the town, bands just rock up and play.

I just took decision of never again a couple of years back when we stepped in at the last minute after some bands dropped out and only two people showed up. Two f***ing people. They've asked us back, but ne'er again.



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I don't play very much these days - maybe a handful of times a year - so I'm glad just to get out. Within reasonable limits I've always enjoyed playing sh*teholes & rough joints. I mostly found them quite entertaining , but never liked getting threatened. I always seemed to attract slightly "eccentric" people but now have got better at avoiding eye contact.

I'm probably not alone in having swung a bass in the direction of unwanted attention?

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[quote name='Thunderbird' timestamp='1495652832' post='3305670']
wasn't the Billy by any chance
[/quote]
[quote name='PaulGibsonBass' timestamp='1495692513' post='3305830']
Yes it was. A pity, because it's a good venue.
[/quote]


I've heard it's under new management as of a couple of weeks ago - has anyone been in since they changed hands?

Edited by EliasMooseblaster
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The only gig I've refused to go back to was a restaurant gig at the Swanage Blues Festival when I was in a duo with an acoustic guitarist. We were told to set up at the end of the bar, which was beside the coffee machine. They were making coffee for most of the night. We couldn't hear ourselves over the grinding and hissing sound of that bloody machine.

I used to play a gig in Ladbroke Grove in the early 70's and when the fights broke out it was like they were out of the Beano, a big ball of dust with arms and legs poking out. I'm surprised no one ever got seriously hurt. The one rule we had was never to stop playing. They used to come over afterwards and apologise for spoiling our songs!!

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[quote name='blue' timestamp='1495742210' post='3306322']
Anyone play in a bar or pub where you had to set up in front of the entrance to the bathrooms?

I have. 😞

Blue
[/quote]

A whole evening exposed the the smell of sulfer,soap and shi*t.

Talk about paying your dues.

Blue

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[quote name='blue' timestamp='1495742210' post='3306322']
Anyone play in a bar or pub where you had to set up in front of the entrance to the bathrooms?

I have.

Blue
[/quote]

at least you know everyone in there will see you at least once :)

one pub we played at, the girl's toilets were just in front of the stage to the left. We got a parade that was very distracting, our drummer would point out all the 10s to me hehe

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[quote name='Thunderbird' timestamp='1495652832' post='3305670']
wasn't the Billy by any chance
[/quote]

Played there a bunch of times but I try to avoid rock bands these days so not likely to be there again. We once had to endure the landlady's sister doing a burlesque routine with a couple of her mates at half time. Was utterly disturbing but at least I had a clean bit of floor to stand on afterwards as her nipple tassels had swept it clear.

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Just remembered a strange little place in Soho that some others of this parish must surely have played - anyone else been to Jazz After Dark?

The owner doubles up as a portrait painter, and to be fair, he's not too shabby with a paintbrush - evidence of this can be found all around this poky little venue, where the walls are covered in his paintings of famous musicians. This is a little unsettling to begin with, as you find yourself somewhat boxed in on an already small stage, hoping you don't poke the head of your bass through one of the canvasses.

To make matters more unsettling, he seems to have an obsession with the late Amy Winehouse. I think she might have frequented the place back in the day, and her likeness has been painted far more than any other famous name on the wall. In fact, there's a little booth off to the side of the stage - used as a bit of backstage area in quieter periods - which is chock full of paintings of Ms Winehouse, staring down at you from every angle.

A few years ago, I ended up playing there far more times than I would have liked. I think about one time in every five or six, there was a little life in the place. Not somewhere I'll be rushing back to.

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Hah pretty much every indoor one I've ever played in and that's over 200.

Low ceilings, stuck in a corner + half pissed half disinterested crowd+ crap beer+ underlying threats of random violence (often featuring a pool cue)+ heckling = the norm

Nowadays I'd only ever play daytime, outdoor gigs e.g onion & other fayres celebrating different types of vegetable or summer fruit (we get a lot of these around Glos and Worcs :) ), Women's Institute jamborees, beer festivals and being at the arse end of the bill at summer festivals. I like to be in bed by midnight and don't want gigs to get in the way of watching re-runs of Law & Order UK and Midsomer Murders

Edited by Barking Spiders
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