markdavid Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 (edited) Hi All I have a gig that I am meant to be going to with my wife at the start of September that I have had tickets for a while, told my band mates about the gig a good week ago as we usually rehearse on Friday nights which is when the gig is. Went to rehearsal last night and was told we have a gig booked for that same night, our drummer/singer expects me to cancel the gig I am going to. The thing is our guitar player that joined the band a few weeks ago knows very few of our songs, our last gig went well but was cut very short by the fact that the guitar player knows maybe 8 of our 20 songs, we were on for about half hour whereas the band that was on after us played for over an hour. With the above in mind am I right to be hesitant to cancel the gig I am going to ? Edited August 22, 2017 by markdavid Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve Browning Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 If you told them you were unavailable then no gig should have been booked. Go to your gig. Not sure the band sounds like much of a proposition if you are thinking about recruiting another mouth to feed to supplement a passenger. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fftc Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 Would it be easier for you to find a new band or a new wife? Which one do you care about the most? If it's honours even for those two questions then go to the gig with your wife. It was booked first! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Osiris Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 We use an online calendar that each band member can access to avoid this type of situation. But that only works if everyone actually fills it in.... In your situation, I'd not only take the wife to the gig that you have tickets for, but I'd also be on the look out for a new band to join. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris_b Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 I would usually do the gig. For me that's the only point of playing bass or being in a band, but whenever I have told bands that I can't do a particular date and it clashes with a gig we just get a dep. It pays to have a good dep up your sleeve. I told one band leader several times I couldn't work on one date and he got a gig anyway. We found a dep when I stuck to my guns and ultimately that was the reason I was fired. That's always a possibility if you work with a-holes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaulWarning Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 [quote name='Osiris' timestamp='1502872564' post='3354007'] We use an online calendar that each band member can access to avoid this type of situation. But that only works if everyone actually fills it in.... In your situation, I'd not only take the wife to the gig that you have tickets for, but I'd also be on the look out for a new band to join. [/quote]this, if someone says they're unavailable a gig shouldn't get booked, simple, on the other hand if anybody'e forgot to fill in the calendar I would expect them to do the gig, having said all that we do double check with everyone before confirming any gig Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marc S Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 If you were booked and told your band, you should remind your band of this There's no way you should cancel the gig you're attending with your wife I work on the principle that whatever or whoever I promised first - that's what I stick with.... Being in several bands - I've been known to turn down paying gigs if I'd already promised my time to another band.... even if the 1st booking was only a freebie No dilemma for you here - now, if you hadn't already told your band you were unavailable........ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
markdavid Posted August 16, 2017 Author Share Posted August 16, 2017 [quote name='fftc' timestamp='1502872469' post='3354006'] Would it be easier for you to find a new band or a new wife? Which one do you care about the most? If it's honours even for those two questions then go to the gig with your wife. It was booked first! [/quote] very well put,i will be going to the gig with my wife Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
markdavid Posted August 16, 2017 Author Share Posted August 16, 2017 [quote name='Marc S' timestamp='1502873365' post='3354014'] If you were booked and told your band, you should remind your band of this There's no way you should cancel the gig you're attending with your wife I work on the principle that whatever or whoever I promised first - that's what I stick with.... Being in several bands - I've been known to turn down paying gigs if I'd already promised my time to another band.... even if the 1st booking was only a freebie No dilemma for you here - now, if you hadn't already told your band you were unavailable........ [/quote] thanks, yes had already told the band i wasn't available on that date Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimR Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 I'd be looking for a new band. Neither of the other two seem to have a clue about being in or running a band. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris_b Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 Just get a dep and everything is covered. A band should do all the gigs it can so cancelling everyone's gig just because one person can't do it is the least acceptable course of action in my book. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dad3353 Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 [quote name='chris_b' timestamp='1502875504' post='3354047'] Just get a dep and everything is covered. A band should do all the gigs it can so cancelling everyone's gig just because one person can't do it is the least acceptable course of action in my book. [/quote] It's for the person that accepted the gig to get a dep, as it had already been made clear that the OP would not be available. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fretmeister Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 [quote name='markdavid' timestamp='1502873438' post='3354016'] very well put,i will be going to the gig with my wife [/quote] Far better to have an annoyed band rather than an angry wife! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy Jack Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 But there's one thing I gotta know ... should I stay or should I go? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gjones Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 Don't do it! 20 years ago myself, the drummer and keyboard player all had tickets to see the Rolling stones. The singer/guitarist didn't, and he persuaded us all to play a gig at a local beer festival instead. I've regretted it ever since!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris_b Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 [quote name='Dad3353' timestamp='1502876068' post='3354055'] It's for the person that accepted the gig to get a dep, as it had already been made clear that the OP would not be available. [/quote] It doesn't matter who gets the dep as long as he does a good job and fits in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikel Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 Personally I would rather play than watch, its the reason I learned to play instruments. It sounds to me like your heart is not in this band, I could be wrong, just my take on your post. If you booked the tickets a long time ago, and you have band practice every week, why wait till one week before the concert to let them know about it? That would also suggest this band may not be for you. Go to the concert, and let your band know of your concerns re the guitarist, and let them know it was the big factor in you not doing there gig. It may bring things to a head with the other members and you can find out just how committed they are to making the band work. Tell it like you see it and see how they react. One way or another the band will improve, or, you will find out its not worth your time and you can find something else. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cat Burrito Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 I depends on the gig / situation but if you said and want to go, I'd remind them of this. If you are not that bothered, it is less of a deal (I've let tickets go for gigs before) but if they are going to regularly be silly like this, best you find out now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimR Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 Yes. Normally you'd get a dep in but depends on what your band does (cover standards or complicated originals) and by the sounds of it the Guitarist doesn't really know what he is doing so it's a car crash in the making. If you're trying to get a band off the ground, car crashes are something you want to avoid. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EliasMooseblaster Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 [quote name='TimR' timestamp='1502878824' post='3354093'] If you're trying to get a band off the ground, car crashes are something you want to avoid. [/quote] ^ this! If the new guitarist knows less than half the set, I'm amazed your drummer/singer is so keen to book another gig at three weeks' notice. Not to say that he couldn't learn the rest in time, but that doesn't leave you many more rehearsals to make sure the set's up to scratch. You've got a prior engagement, and you likely don't know when that band is likely to be in town again. The gig your drummer's booked is probably a lot more replaceable than the tickets you've already paid for. As per the general consensus above: knowing a reliable dep will help with this kind of thing in future, but also it wouldn't hurt to get your drummer used to the idea that cancelling or moving a gig to a more opportune time is really not the end of the world! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigRedX Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 What is the gig you are going to see? And how much would you be getting paid for the gig you are supposed to be playing? Also from my reading of the OP it sound's like this is an originals band. IME getting Deps for an originals band is a lot harder than getting one for a covers band. For a start absolutely none of the songs are likely to be familiar to the Dep. Secondly there is also the question of image. I've been involved with using dips twice in The Terrortones and neither occasion was brilliant in terms of presenting the band properly. On the first occasion it was myself that needed to replaced. We had landed a very good support at the last minute, but I was already booked for a gig with my other (covers) band and they absolutely refused to allow me to use a Dep for them. Luckily we were able to find someone in time, and while he did a perfectly adequate job musically, from the videos I have seen of the gig, visually (and the Terrortones were a VERY visual band) he wasn't very good. He wasn't really dressed appropriately - we didn't expect him to go the full leather/PVC Psychobilly haircut look but he couldn't even do: "wear black, no trainers and obvious band or brand logos". On the second occasion we needed a drummer for a long distance gig. This time we had someone from another Rockabilly band so at least he had the look right. And musically he managed to get nearly all the tricky bits nailed. Unfortunately he managed to mess up the single twice (we played it again as an encore because we'd not done a particularly good job of it in the set) in two different and very noticeable ways. Neither gig went well enough for us to be asked back and one potentially lost us a lot of good support slots at decent venues. Also on both occasions we had seriously modify the set and drop all the newer songs in favour of ones we already had recordings of so that our Deps would be able to learn them. We were lucky in that we had a lot of songs recorded, but not every originals band unless they are well established is going to have that luxury. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trueno Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 [quote name='TimR' timestamp='1502874395' post='3354034'] I'd be looking for a new band. Neither of the other two seem to have a clue about being in or running a band. [/quote] Maybe you just get more cynical when you've been in a lot of bands, but I'd go with this, personally. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thunderbird Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 Go with the wife the guys in the band sounds like right tools anyway Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lojo Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 [quote name='Steve Browning' timestamp='1502872287' post='3354003'] If you told them you were unavailable then no gig should have been booked. [/quote] This is how things should work Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jezzaboy Posted August 16, 2017 Share Posted August 16, 2017 (edited) The twat that ran the band I have just left did something similar. Asked us about a gig and when the drummer and rhythm guitarist couldn`t make it, got in his brother and another drummer, a fact that he forgot to tell me about until I pitched up at a rehearsal. I did the gig and the deps did a decent enough job but that was the final nail in the coffin for that version of the band. A few weeks later myself, drummer and rhythm guitarist walked and it feels real good. So take your good lady out and have a wonderful evening. Edited August 16, 2017 by jezzaboy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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