julesb Posted November 12, 2017 Posted November 12, 2017 ...Just a bit of fun. Descriptions seen in ads that maybe true but are faintly ridiculous. (I'm not pleading innocence here by the way) I'll start with... 1. Plays like butter (often spelt buttah) 2. Never been gigged (never really seen the point of that one) 3. All original (so what if it's as good a bass you're telling me it is) 4. Bought it new for £1300 a week ago. (Take it back to the shop) 5.? 3 Quote
Graham Posted November 12, 2017 Posted November 12, 2017 "If you're reading this, you know what it is" Well, no actually not necesarilly, any chance of some detail? 1 Quote
Len_derby Posted November 12, 2017 Posted November 12, 2017 "Collection only, I don't trust couriers." With no indication where the seller lives..... 1 Quote
thepurpleblob Posted November 12, 2017 Posted November 12, 2017 (edited) Just a "WTF?" for "plays like butter". I have never had the slightest clue what that means!! I imagine that Americans are to blame though Edited November 12, 2017 by thepurpleblob 1 Quote
thepurpleblob Posted November 12, 2017 Posted November 12, 2017 (edited) Oh - some reference to rarity. Typically accompanied by an unrealistically high price. Usually attached to an instrument so horrid that almost nobody bought them in the first place ! Edited November 12, 2017 by thepurpleblob Quote
mrtcat Posted November 12, 2017 Posted November 12, 2017 2 minutes ago, thepurpleblob said: Just a "WTF?" for "plays like butter". I have never had the slightest clue what that means!! I imagine that Americans are to blame though It's because "plays like cabbage" doesn't sound as good. 1 3 Quote
Woodinblack Posted November 12, 2017 Posted November 12, 2017 Rarety seems quite a common one. Not only is it easy to look up, but some times there is a very good reason why something that is rare, such as a Kay bass that hasn't been thrown on a bonfire or something! Quote
GuyR Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 "Made of pure Unobtanium" is one of my least favourites. 1 Quote
thepurpleblob Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 "This price for today only!" So if I wait until tomorrow and offer you "today's price" you won't be interested? Ok then... Quote
Jus Lukin Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 (edited) - Edited March 1, 2022 by Jus Lukin Quote
leftybassman392 Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 (edited) Ah yes: seller bullshit. As the OP said, mostly perfectly understandable and mostly fairly harmless. Still, in for a penny:- 'Plays like butter'. Never understood this one either. You mean you've played your favourite slap bass licks on a slab of butter and find that the item for sale feels exactly the same? It does scan better than 'Plays like engine oil' I guess... Edited November 13, 2017 by leftybassman392 making it even funnier Quote
neepheid Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 My theory is that the "plays like butter" thing is a contraction of the notion that something is as easy to play as it is to slice through some butter with a hot knife. It's just been shortened beyond it making sense any more. Quote
discreet Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 2 hours ago, Jus Lukin said: If I could find the puking smiley, I'd post it here for effect. Here, borrow one of mine. Quote
discreet Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 (edited) Mmm, butter... I suppose if you have an aversion to dairy products you could say 'smooth as silk' or some such. That would make sense if referring to La Bella flats... but then, you could just say 'smooth as La Bella flats'. Mmm, La bella flats... Edited November 13, 2017 by discreet Quote
Bridgehouse Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 "Best I've ever played" - so why are you selling it? "I can't believe I'm selling it" - er, so why are you selling it? 1 Quote
EBS_freak Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 Strung with flats. Well given the majority of people play round wounds and most people will want to play it before purchase... are you trying to scupper your own sale? Quote
Les Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 "I know I'm gonna regret this............" We don't care 1 Quote
EBS_freak Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 Absolutely mint - see the pictures to show the small dings (hardly be able to be picked up by camera*) *Looks like hell to the naked eye. Quote
Grangur Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 Was Andy Irvine the originator of the reference to butter? I know he always claimed it aplied to every Warwick he picked up. The other one I don't get is "plays itself". 1 1 Quote
EBS_freak Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 Rare (then you look in the BC listings and find another 3 for sale) Quote
EBS_freak Posted November 13, 2017 Posted November 13, 2017 Just now, Grangur said: The other one I don't get is "plays itself". Especially when the word "literally" is inserted before the word play. Err.. it literally doesn't. Quote
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