Top tip

[Creeper]

Top tip for those struggling with their bathroom scales why trying to get the weight of their bass, bought myself one of those suitcase weighing devices for £5, just wrap the strap around the headstock and lift, job done ✅ 

[ahpook]

Sure beats my usual method of weighing my wife and then getting her to hold the bass and then weighing her again

 

 

 

[Geek99]

bet she loves that....

[pfretrock]

Attach a foot or so  of guitar string to a tuner, hang the bass from a door lintel, adjust tuner so the string plays the nearest note. Measure length of string. Calculate the tension = weight.  (You'll need the formula from the string manufacturer)

NOTE: I've never actually done this, please don't try it,  it may be dangerous, it's only a theory. 

[Creeper]

24 minutes ago, ahpook said:

Sure beats my usual method of weighing my wife and then getting her to hold the bass and then weighing her again

 

 

 

I do that with my dog 🐕 

[Creeper]

Just now, Creeper said:

I do that with my dog 🐕 

But obviously not with your wife 😁

[mikel]

Just now, pfretrock said:

Attach a foot or so  of guitar string to a tuner, hang the bass from a door lintel, adjust tuner so the string plays the nearest note. Measure length of string. Calculate the tension = weight.  (You'll need the formula from the string manufacturer)

NOTE: I've never actually done this, please don't try it,  it may be dangerous, it's only a theory. 

Oh....that sounds simple. Now what is the number of my string manufacturer.  The Wife on the scales sounds the best bet, and it saves you  £5.

[Guest MoJo]

3 minutes ago, Creeper said:

I do that with my dog 🐕 

You weigh you dog holding your bass? Have you seen Britain's Got Talent?

[ahpook]

 

7 minutes ago, pfretrock said:

Attach a foot or so  of guitar string to a tuner, hang the bass from a door lintel, adjust tuner so the string plays the nearest note. Measure length of string. Calculate the tension = weight.  (You'll need the formula from the string manufacturer)

NOTE: I've never actually done this, please don't try it,  it may be dangerous, it's only a theory. 

I like the way you think

[casapete]

6 hours ago, Creeper said:

Top tip for those struggling with their bathroom scales why trying to get the weight of their bass, bought myself one of those suitcase weighing devices for £5, just wrap the strap around the headstock and lift, job done ✅ 

If you look in one of the cheaper stores (like Home Bargains etc) you can pick up the digital ones

for around the same price too (assuming you were referring to the ones with a dial?).

Probably a bit more accurate. 

[Creeper]

32 minutes ago, casapete said:

If you look in one of the cheaper stores (like Home Bargains etc) you can pick up the digital ones

for around the same price too (assuming you were referring to the ones with a dial?).

Probably a bit more accurate. 

It’s digital ones that I have, take your choice of pounds or Kilos, does a good job.

[bassace]

Run a bath, then put the bass in it. Measure the volume of water displaced ( make before and after marks on the side of the bath) and calculate the weight of the bass according to Archimedes. Then take the next five days to dry out the electronics and check the neck for any warps. This will save you the £5.

May need refinishing.

[Creeper]

28 minutes ago, bassace said:

Run a bath, then put the bass in it. Measure the volume of water displaced ( make before and after marks on the side of the bath) and calculate the weight of the bass according to Archimedes. Then take the next five days to dry out the electronics and check the neck for any warps. This will save you the £5.

May need refinishing.

That’s not going to work, that’s just going to give you the volume, not the weight, you would also need density and mass to make the appropriate calculations, and whilst volume by itself would be an interesting area of bass research, it’s not going to help those wishing to lighten the load.

You would get better results by incinerating the bass and collecting the resulting gasses in an atomising spectrometer, which would provide accurate measurements of all the bass elements which went into the manufacture. This would then provide the most accurate weight measurement of the guitar. 

However it may prove difficult to sell afterwards.......

[bassace]

I defer to your superior knowledge, Creeper. I only just scraped Physics A levels but went on to bluff my way to success. So there’s hope for us all I suppose.

[Creeper]

It was a load of bollocks that I just made up, sounded good though 😁

[ahpook]

58 minutes ago, Creeper said:

That’s not going to work, that’s just going to give you the volume, not the weight, you would also need density and mass to make the appropriate calculations, and whilst volume by itself would be an interesting area of bass research, it’s not going to help those wishing to lighten the load.

You would get better results by incinerating the bass and collecting the resulting gasses in an atomising spectrometer, which would provide accurate measurements of all the bass elements which went into the manufacture. This would then provide the most accurate weight measurement of the guitar. 

However it may prove difficult to sell afterwards.......

If you took the bass to pieces you could measure the volume of each one and then look up the density of them...hence their weight.

But I suppose you may as well just weigh the pieces and add them up.

Aha...another method then...dismantle the bass and weigh the parts on your kitchen scales !

 

 

Edited January 26, 2018 by ahpook

[lurksalot]

8 hours ago, pfretrock said:

..........

NOTE: I've never actually done this, please don't try it,  it may be dangerous, it's only a theory. 

After instigating a thread recently of a scientific nature , I learnt that the thing you speak of, is actually a hypothesis , not a theory 

[3below]

9 hours ago, pfretrock said:

Attach a foot or so  of guitar string to a tuner, hang the bass from a door lintel, adjust tuner so the string plays the nearest note. Measure length of string. Calculate the tension = weight.  (You'll need the formula from the string manufacturer)

NOTE: I've never actually done this, please don't try it,  it may be dangerous, it's only a theory. 

This is eminently do-able, however the proposed method does require some slight modifications.  You will need a tuner to measure the frequency of the guitar string, know the string diameter (in SI units) and either measure the mass of the length of string or calculate the mass per unit length based on the density. Use the appropriate equation and out will come the answer. 

[SH73]

I only weigh sugar and flour when I bake. I wonder how much a 1:1 scale bass cake would weight.

Well it depends if was made like Christmas pudding or light sponge. 

 

[Bobthedog]

This reminds me of a story told by a colleague of mine. He bought some clever electronic scales that also connected to an app on his iPhone. One day whilst at work the app pinged open and declared a persons weight. A few minutes later the app pinged open again and showed a weight roughly 2kgs lighter than the previous one. He thought odd but thought nothing of it assuming his daughter and a friend must be at home. When he later questioned the daughter on how her day went she said she had been out all day on the coast. The only slightly queasy assumption he could come up with was his cleaner must of weighed herself. Then got undressed and re weighed herself!

Edited January 27, 2018 by Bobthedog

[FinnDave]

4 hours ago, SH73 said:

I only weigh sugar and flour when I bake. I wonder how much a 1:1 scale bass cake would weight.

Well it depends if was made like Christmas pudding or light sponge. 

 

I prefer the tone of a traditional Christmas pudding, these modern light weight sponges will be the ruination of bass playing.

[ahpook]

1 hour ago, FinnDave said:

I prefer the tone of a traditional Christmas pudding, these modern light weight sponges will be the ruination of bass playing.

 

[Norris]

If your bass weighs less than a duck then it's a witch and you should burn it

#MontyPython

[tonyquipment]

I take the bass apart and weigh all the parts individually then add it all up at the end  

itemised. 

[stewblack]

Best thread ever. Even my mum is laughing aloud as I read it to her.