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Ridiculous requests


T-Bay

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It seems to come on here quite regularly, so wondering what mad requests people have had from punters over the years. Our most surreal one was a middle age bloke asking if we did any Kylie. We are a hard rock/ alternative/ punk band. I usually just say it’s in the next set, or we will play it next time but that one left me nowhere to go. He was friendly sort so no harm but why would you ask that?

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You wouldn’t believe what my acoustic duo gets requests for. We do a weekly pub gig where we encourage requests via forms we distribute on the bar & tables. We have lots of regular punters who know us well so most requests are reasonably doable. However you can always tell if the requests are from new punters as they vary from smart ar*e ( Bohemian Rhapsody etc) to obscure show tunes / heavy rap / metal / garage etc etc. Sometimes we do surprise them by having a go though.... 😄

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While playing in an originals folk/rock band we were asked if we could play Wonderwall. I just said that the next song was our reworking of the Oasis classic , we've given it a different tune and new words, we then launched into whichever of our own songs  happened to be next on the set list and nobody complained.

Edited by Dom in Somerset
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1 hour ago, musicbassman said:

1980's - 3 piece covers band - keyboards, bass, drums, at a masonic function.

Dear lady who was in charge of the function asked if we could "go from table to table, singing and playing" , like Spanish troubadours...........................🙄

And i hope you obliged. :D

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4 hours ago, musicbassman said:

1980's - 3 piece covers band - keyboards, bass, drums, at a masonic function.

Dear lady who was in charge of the function asked if we could "go from table to table, singing and playing" , like Spanish troubadours...........................🙄

Woman in charge of a masonic function??? 🙄

Edited by gs_triumph
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In a wedding/function band there's no such thing as a ridiculous request. I've played some right rubbish over the years that I'd never heard of - luckily our keyboard player has a huge repertoire of forgotten classics so I just follow him.

A few weeks back it was the other way around - we got asked for Wishing Well by Free and me and the guitarist had played it years ago in a rock band. The singer did a really good job of it as he'd never sung it before and had to look up the lyrics.

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44 minutes ago, Delberthot said:

A few weeks back it was the other way around - we got asked for Wishing Well by Free and me and the guitarist had played it years ago in a rock band. The singer did a really good job of it as he'd never sung it before and had to look up the lyrics.

We do that in our duo sometimes! All usually goes well until the massive key change at the end...😅

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Not sure if it counts as ridiculous, but the one that always made me annoyed was when i was playing guitar in an old school punk covers band we quite frequently got asked "it's my mate's birthday, can you play Happy Birthday?"

Is it by the Sex Pistols?

Beyond that we never got any inappropriate songs, it was usually "do you know *some obscure song* by *some obscure punk band*?"  Er, no.

43 minutes ago, gs_triumph said:

Woman in charge of a masonic function??? 🙄

My ex's Dad was quite a big noise in his local masons and they genuinely don't see that only allowing men to be masons is at all sexist.  Because (as they see it) they put women on a pedestal, to be looked after and cherished, and they shouldn't have to dirty their hands or bother their pretty little heads with things like business. So wives get invited to all the functions, and are well fed and watered, getting flowers and chocolates, etc.  Of course what that actually means is that when it is their husband's time to host (i.e. pay for) an event the wives will be left to run it all (because women have a much better feel for that sort of a thing) and compete furiously to out do each other.

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The best one I ever had was during a gig with my old jazz-fusion trio at a jazz venue in Bristol. We had just finished a John Scofield tune and were about to launch into another instrumental epic when this I've-had-one-alcopop-too-many student-type came up to me. "Do you do Iron Man by Black Sabbath?" he asked. I looked at him incredulously. "Do we sound like the sort of band that does Iron Man by Black Sabbath?" I replied with a laugh.
We launched into the aforementioned instrumental epic, at the end of which there he was again. "Do you know Iron Man by Black Sabbath?" he asked. "No we bloody don't", I replied somewhat testily. I wandered away from him to try to signal that the exchange was definitely ended and we dived into another lengthy widdle.
At the end, yup, there he was again. "Why won't you play Iron Man?" he demanded. I gave him my very best Paddington Bear Hard Stare. "Oh come on, you must know it!" he said. "Look pal," I said in a firm this-conversation-is-over tone, "just f*** off eh?".
Thankfully, he got the message and f***ed off. I'm pretty sure he was only doing it for a laugh anyway. Perhaps his poncy mates put him up to it.
(I wouldn't normally tell a punter to sex-&-travel, but this gimboid was seriously getting on my toot.)

 

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26 minutes ago, Monkey Steve said:

Not sure if it counts as ridiculous, but the one that always made me annoyed was when i was playing guitar in an old school punk covers band we quite frequently got asked "it's my mate's birthday, can you play Happy Birthday?"

Is it by the Sex Pistols?

Beyond that we never got any inappropriate songs, it was usually "do you know *some obscure song* by *some obscure punk band*?"  Er, no.

We used to get this so often in my punk covers band that we learned a speeded up punk version of happy birthday to please the punters

 

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14 minutes ago, Rich said:

...At the end, yup, there he was again...

Slightly off-topic, but this reminded me of a joke...

One day a small boy goes into a bakery and asks the baker:

"Do you have cucumber tarts..?"

- No, sorry, I haven't.

He comes back the next day and asks again...

"Do you have cucumber tarts..?"

The baker replies the same way...

- No, sorry, I've not got cucumber tarts.

This is repeated for the next three days...

"Do you have cucumber tarts..?"

- No, sorry, I don't.

Feeling a bit sorry for the kid, that evening he asked his wife to prepare some cucumber tarts, specially for the young'un.

The next morning the boy enters the bakery and asks again...

"Do you have cucumber tarts..?"

This time, the baker says...

- Yes I have..!

And the boy says, pulling a wry face...

"Beuh..! They taste horrible, don't they..!"

Sorry; as you were. Carry on...

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7 hours ago, T-Bay said:

It seems to come on here quite regularly, so wondering what mad requests people have had from punters over the years. Our most surreal one was a middle age bloke asking if we did any Kylie. We are a hard rock/ alternative/ punk band. I usually just say it’s in the next set, or we will play it next time but that one left me nowhere to go. He was friendly sort so no harm but why would you ask that?

Dunno mate but can you do any Quo?

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57 minutes ago, SpondonBassed said:

Dunno mate but can you do any Quo?

Don't mate, had to play rockin all over the world last week when we helping out with the youth group doing school of rock, what a load of crap that is. Rhythm guitarist and me tried to make it fun but it is so boring

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