Just a thought...

[Born 2B Mild]

Every day, somewhere in the world, loads of brand new bass guitars are 'born'. Whether they eminate from luthiers or factories, there are lots and lots coming in to the world all the time. But do bass guitars go the Great Bass Gallery In The Sky at the same rate?

If more are created than destroyed, will the world be big enough, or will we all need to have bass harems in order to manage the increasing masses?

or what?

[crez5150]

[quote name='Born 2B Mild' post='339828' date='Nov 28 2008, 04:38 PM']Every day, somewhere in the world, loads of brand new bass guitars are 'born'. Whether they eminate from luthiers or factories, there are lots and lots coming in to the world all the time. But do bass guitars go the Great Bass Gallery In The Sky at the same rate?

If more are created than destroyed, will the world be big enough, or will we all need to have bass harems in order to manage the increasing masses?

or what?

[/quote]

You can tell it's Friday....... eh....

[tauzero]

[quote name='Born 2B Mild' post='339828' date='Nov 28 2008, 04:38 PM']Every day, somewhere in the world, loads of brand new bass guitars are 'born'. Whether they eminate from luthiers or factories, there are lots and lots coming in to the world all the time. But do bass guitars go the Great Bass Gallery In The Sky at the same rate?[/quote]
They go at differing rates, according to how crap they are. So the dreadful Hofner violin basses are now rare because their best use was as firewood. People couldn't even be bothered to take their 70s Fenders down to the bin, so they finished up under beds the length and breadth of the country.

There is also the minor fact that as every new bass player is born, so the number of basses required in the world goes up by several, and due to GAS, there is always churn. As the saying goes, "Anyone who hasn't had a Fender by the time they're 25 has no heart. Anyone who still has a Fender by the time they're 35 has no brain. And anyone who has a Hohner B2 has no head".

[Happy Jack]

[quote name='tauzero' post='340186' date='Nov 29 2008, 12:33 AM']So the dreadful Hofner violin basses are now rare because their best use was as firewood.[/quote]

Ooooh - you bitch!

[skankdelvar]

[quote name='tauzero' post='340186' date='Nov 29 2008, 12:33 AM']As the saying goes, "Anyone who hasn't had a Fender by the time they're 25 has no heart. Anyone who still has a Fender by the time they're 35 has no brain. And anyone who has a Hohner B2 has no head".[/quote]

If we're talking about Bass Heaven - well, look unto the Good Book for guidance, wherein it is written in the Old Testament:

"He who takes unto himself a Fender, yea even unto a 'previously cherished' Squier Badz Maru, is thrice-blessed by the Lord and shall sit upon His right hand for all eternity, yet he who worships at the Altar of The German Antichrist shall be cast screaming into the lake of fire where they shall roast until Judgment Day (and no inconsiderable time thereafter).

So saith the Lord."

[i]Book of Rehoboam - Chap 8 vs 23[/i]

[Tinman]

[quote name='skankdelvar' post='340408' date='Nov 29 2008, 12:32 PM']If we're talking about Bass Heaven - well, look unto the Good Book for guidance, wherein it is written in the Old Testament:

"He who takes unto himself a Fender, yea even unto a 'previously cherished' Squier Badz Maru, is thrice-blessed by the Lord and shall sit upon His right hand for all eternity, yet he who worships at the Altar of The German Antichrist shall be cast screaming into the lake of fire where they shall roast until Judgment Day (and no inconsiderable time thereafter).

So saith the Lord."

[i]Book of Rehoboam - Chap 8 vs 23[/i][/quote]
Now, that really is positive evidence that the Old Testament is full of fairy tales

[skankdelvar]

...and so another theological warfare thread begins

[Tinman]

[quote name='skankdelvar' post='340849' date='Nov 29 2008, 11:00 PM']...and so another theological warfare thread begins [/quote]
I do hope not. That certainly wasn't my intention. I was merely commenting on the statement about God taking a Fender player to sit at his right hand.
Certainly no insult intended

[Kiwi]

to paraphase the [url="http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/A11687844"]H2G2[/url]

[i]"It is generally accepted that all physical objects can be classified as either animate (i.e. capable of movement without the application of external forces) or inanimate (with regard to location of the whole or parts, static).
However, as many people have observed, supposedly inanimate objects often demonstrate a surprising ability to animate themselves. This usually manifests as an inanimate object moving without obvious means of locomotion. For example, a potted plant balanced on a window ledge on a day when the air is still, will inexplicably topple and fall. Another familiar example is the case of someone who knows where they left an inanimate object but on going to retrieve it, is unable to find it. Questioning of household members indicates that nobody removed the object, but it is later found in a different location than originally expected. If the obvious possibilities are precluded, i.e.
(a ) the person misplaced the object because of a flawed memory
(b ) at least one member of the household is not being truthful
then however implausible it may seem, the object must have moved itself. This proposition raises the question of whether any object can truly be considered inanimate.

This tendency of inanimate objects to animate themselves unexpectedly has led at least one researcher to conclude that Biros slip away through wormholes in space to a Biro planet where they can lead a Biroid-lifestyle. The same thing is presumably the case for other objects that go missing randomly, such as the lids of plastic food containers, and individual socks..."[/i]

...and basses?

[skankdelvar]

[quote name='Tinman' post='341011' date='Nov 30 2008, 11:52 AM']I do hope not. That certainly wasn't my intention. I was merely commenting on the statement about God taking a Fender player to sit at his right hand.
Certainly no insult intended[/quote]

No, that's it! I'm so deeply offended reason hath deserted me!! The name of the Lord ith being taken in vain!!!

The doors of Heavenly Paradise are henceforth shut to all humanity until you, [i]SINMAN[/i] repenteth and go forth into the wilderness and pluck for me from the fiery bush a Mojo-laden yet somehow entirely pristine NOS '55 Precision and send it to:

Pastor Billy Bob Spittoon
Latterday Church of Non-Believers
15, The Council Houses
Cemetary Crescent
Littlehampton

And this just in from God - as with dogs, [i]all[/i] basses go to heaven - even Hondos.

Edited November 30, 2008 by skankdelvar

[Tinman]

[quote name='skankdelvar' post='341108' date='Nov 30 2008, 01:36 PM']No, that's it! I'm so deeply offended reason hath deserted me!! The name of the Lord ith being taken in vain!!!

The doors of Heavenly Paradise are henceforth shut to all humanity until you, [i]SINMAN[/i] repenteth and go forth into the wilderness and pluck for me from the fiery bush a Mojo-laden yet somehow entirely pristine NOS '55 Precision and send it to:

Pastor Billy Bob Spittoon
Latterday Church of Non-Believers
15, The Council Houses
Cemetary Crescent
Littlehampton

And this just in from God - as with dogs, [i]all[/i] basses go to heaven - even Hondos.[/quote]
Nay!!!! I defy thee SKANK[i]DEVIL[/i].

Take thee and thy Fenders, with their hardware from Matalan and spend thine eternity wandering in the wilderness in search of a Godly instrument with which to lay down thy hot licks.
For lo, it shall come to pass that I shall sit at the right hand of our Lord, shaking the very foundations of the earth and moistening the Angelic Hosts gussets with my fine and cleverly constructed tool of the low end. For ye should know this, believers in the false God that is called Fender, thou shalt not enter the heavenly Bass Gallery until thee repent and pay the Prophet Shuker that he may build me another of his fine instruments.

Edited November 30, 2008 by Tinman

[Kiwi]

[quote name='Tinman' post='341011' date='Nov 30 2008, 11:52 AM']I do hope not. That certainly wasn't my intention. I was merely commenting on the statement about God taking a Fender player to sit at his right hand.
Certainly no insult intended[/quote]
why would anyone want someone to sit on their right hand? Is it cold up in heaven?

[WalMan]

[quote name='tauzero' post='340186' date='Nov 29 2008, 12:33 AM']As the saying goes, "Anyone who hasn't had a Fender by the time they're 25 has no heart. Anyone who still has a Fender by the time they're 35 has no brain.".[/quote]

Blimey, I'm a heartless basstard! I've never had one (unless G&L count by connection through Leo)

[quote name='skankdelvar' post='341108' date='Nov 30 2008, 01:36 PM']The doors of Heavenly Paradise are henceforth shut to all humanity until you, [i]SINMAN[/i] repenteth and go forth into the wilderness and pluck for me from the fiery bush a Mojo-laden yet somehow entirely pristine NOS '55 Precision and send it to:

Pastor Billy Bob Spittoon
Latterday Church of Non-Believers
15, The Council Houses
Cemetary Crescent
Littlehampton[/quote]
Nik & I will be looking out for this one landing

[Mrs Tinman]

[quote name='Tinman' post='341202' date='Nov 30 2008, 04:11 PM']For lo, it shall come to pass that I shall sit at the right hand of our Lord, shaking the very foundations of the earth and moistening the Angelic Hosts gussets[/quote]

Nay, I defy thee SINMAN

If I catch you anywhere near any gussets, angelic, moist, or otherwise the divine creature known as 'Lady T' will henceforth be remodelled into firewood

[Tinman]

[quote name='Mrs Tinman' post='341221' date='Nov 30 2008, 04:33 PM']Nay, I defy thee SINMAN

If I catch you anywhere near any gussets, angelic, moist, or otherwise the divine creature known as 'Lady T' will henceforth be remodelled into firewood [/quote]
Oh sh*t!!!!

[Mrs Tinman]

And another thing

Don't think I haven't spotted you getting perverse enjoyment from using two of your favourite words, namely 'gusset' and 'moist' in the same sentence

One mention of the word 'crevice' and I may need to resort to physical violence

[Tinman]

[quote name='Mrs Tinman' post='341224' date='Nov 30 2008, 04:37 PM']And another thing

Don't think I haven't spotted you getting perverse enjoyment from using two of your favourite words, namely 'gusset' and 'moist' in the same sentence

One mention of the word 'crevice' and I may need to resort to physical violence [/quote]
Get thee behind me annoying woman or I shall cast THEE unto a moistened firey crevice that will singe your gusset for all eternity. Know that I am on a holy quest to rid the world of the ungodly believers in 'old Bass' and thou shalt not get in my way, lest thee desire un-naturally warm underwear. So sayeth the messenger of 'new Bass'

[Mrs Tinman]

That'll be me told then

[Mr. Foxen]

Learning to mod basses to a way I like has dissembled four basses and produced two. Course, the parts went on to better things, but there is a net loss overall.

[skankdelvar]

[quote]Nay!!!! I defy thee SKANKDEVIL.[/quote]

Nice return, Sir.

[quote name='Mrs Tinman' post='341224' date='Nov 30 2008, 04:37 PM']And another thing One mention of the word 'crevice' and I may need to resort to physical violence [/quote]

Errr - sorry mate - didn't mean to cause a domestic - just start a global religious war. (Phew! - good job she didn't notice the fiery bush....)

Sorry to the OP for dragging this seriously OT I reckon basses are just stacking up in peoples' houses and rotating periodically through ebay. When d'ya last see a decent stash of s/h gear in a bass / guitar shop? Years, mate, years.

Cos we've all got 'collections' these days....or 'harems' as the Mild-ster so aptly puts it.

Edited November 30, 2008 by skankdelvar

[Lfalex v1.1]

[quote name='tauzero' post='340186' date='Nov 29 2008, 12:33 AM']There is also the minor fact that as every new bass player is born, so the number of basses required in the world goes up by several, and due to GAS, there is always churn. As the saying goes, "Anyone who hasn't had a Fender by the time they're 25 has no heart. Anyone who still has a Fender by the time they're 35 has no brain. And anyone who has a Hohner B2 has no head".[/quote]
Well, I sure am screwed by that rationale, as I didn't own a Fender before I was 25. I still own one now (at 35), and I own a B2AV... Oh dear!


[quote name='Crazykiwi' post='341025' date='Nov 30 2008, 12:14 PM']to paraphase the [url="http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/A11687844"]H2G2[/url]

[i]"It is generally accepted that all physical objects can be classified as either animate (i.e. capable of movement without the application of external forces) or inanimate (with regard to location of the whole or parts, static).
However, as many people have observed, supposedly inanimate objects often demonstrate a surprising ability to animate themselves. This usually manifests as an inanimate object moving without obvious means of locomotion. For example, a potted plant balanced on a window ledge on a day when the air is still, will inexplicably topple and fall. Another familiar example is the case of someone who knows where they left an inanimate object but on going to retrieve it, is unable to find it. Questioning of household members indicates that nobody removed the object, but it is later found in a different location than originally expected. If the obvious possibilities are precluded, i.e.
(a ) the person misplaced the object because of a flawed memory
(b ) at least one member of the household is not being truthful
then however implausible it may seem, the object must have moved itself. This proposition raises the question of whether any object can truly be considered inanimate.

This tendency of inanimate objects to animate themselves unexpectedly has led at least one researcher to conclude that Biros slip away through wormholes in space to a Biro planet where they can lead a Biroid-lifestyle. The same thing is presumably the case for other objects that go missing randomly, such as the lids of plastic food containers, and individual socks..."[/i]

...and basses? [/quote]

But at least I now know why banks keep their pens on chains...

[Happy Jack]

Is it too late to mention Godlyke basses?

Yes, I thought so.

[silverfoxnik]

[quote](skankdelvar @ Nov 30 2008, 01:36 PM)
The doors of Heavenly Paradise are henceforth shut to all humanity until you, SINMAN repenteth and go forth into the wilderness and pluck for me from the fiery bush a Mojo-laden yet somehow entirely pristine NOS '55 Precision and send it to:

Pastor Billy Bob Spittoon
Latterday Church of Non-Believers
15, The Council Houses
Cemetary Crescent
Littlehampton[/quote]

[quote name='WalMan' post='341218' date='Nov 30 2008, 04:27 PM']Blimey, I'm a heartless basstard! I've never had one (unless G&L count by connection through Leo)


Nik & I will be looking out for this one landing [/quote]

Yep - too right Al! I nearly fell off my chair when I saw that Littlehampton had been mentioned in a thread as no-one ever mentions this place.. But if for some very, very wierd reason fellow bass players want to send their basses here, then who are we to stop them.. I'm sure we can find a way to set up some kind of mail re-direct...

Must say, it's good to see everyone getting so 'biblical' on a Sunday.. Which roughly translates to having an arguement and shouting in a Charlton Heston kind of way!