Quitting, Why, When & How

[Al Krow]

1 hour ago, chris_b said:

It's always disappointing to see the originals guys dissing the covers players. Blinkers are never a good accessory for any musician.

Change of heart: if a purely originals bassist wants to slag me off as a covers musician 'cos he's "so much better", he's welcome to; I'll happily settle for having a lot of fun with great bandmates, audiences loving our sets and my annual expenditure on gear and rehearsals being fully met from gig monies 😎

[Monkey Steve]

Quit two bands, been fired once.  everything else just seems to lose momentum for one reason or another, usually when one key member quits/gets fired and can't be replaced, or where life gets in the way and nobody is too fussed about continuing.  I think I'm still notionally in at least two bands that haven't actually got together for some years.

For the two I quit:

1. Originals band, the guitarist (& BL) was digging his heels in over a subtle change of direction that the rest of us wanted to make.  So I quit, and the rest of the band followed.  All very civil, shook hands after the last gig we had booked.
2. Covers band, the lead guitarist was a complete tool bag, and a few of us had been discussing how unhappy we were and should we fire him?  Then he spat his dummy out at me in an e-mail to the whole band when I was completely in the right, and my point of view had been discussed with the rest of the band and agreed with.  I politely declined to continue to be in a band with him as my other (originals) band was a lot more fun and free of stress.  I actually regret not rising to it and telling him exactly what I thought of him - to this day he probably believes that he was in the right and that I just preferred being in my other band (which was doing a lot better than the covers lot)

In answer to Blue's original question:

Why?

The only thing guaranteed to make me start hating rehearsals enough to quit is if one of the band is such a massive c#nt that I can't put up with them any more, and as above, when the band isn't going to do anything about it.  The only other instance I can think of is if life gets in the way and there is no way to continue in the band

When?

As soon as I've made my mind up to quit.  In person if there's a rehearsal or gig booked, by e-mail or whatever social media the band are using if there isn't. Usually I'll have discussed it (well, more like complained about the person in question) for some time beforehand so it won't be a shock to anybody else.   If it's a "life's got in the way" scenario, let everybody know what's happening as things develop and that there's a chance that I may have to leave the band

How?

As civilly as possible.  I may well not care about upsetting the offending band mate, but I'll try and stay on good terms with everybody else - you never know when you might cross paths again, and usually I'm quite good mates with them.  I'll do any gigs that are in the diary if they want me to, and am happy to help out with any new bass player that they can find (provide tabs for originals, etc)

[phil.c60]

1 hour ago, Al Krow said:

Change of heart: if a purely originals bassist wants to slag me off as a covers musician 'cos he's "so much better", he's welcome to; I'll happily settle for having a lot of fun with great bandmates, audiences loving our sets and my annual expenditure on gear and rehearsals being fully met from gig monies 😎

This.

[Al Krow]

@Monkey Steve you mentioned a "subtle change in direction" being the reason for leaving a band. Left me intrigued - do spill the beans as to what this was?

If it really is something subtle / marginal and not more major is it worth sacrificing a band over? Did the rest of the band follow you out ie did you basically sack the BL? 

Subtlety always makes me think of compressors on pedal boards: something so subtle that no one is going to notice if you forget to switch it on. And definitely not worth sacrificing a pedal board over 😄 

[Stylon Pilson]

I've only quit two bands in my life. The second was just a few weeks back. My list of reasons to leave runs to 14 items.

First time, I phoned the band leader. This most recent time, I told everyone at the end of a rehearsal.

S.P.

[bazzbass]

19 hours ago, chris_b said:

I'm currently playing with 2 bands who are playing approx 80% originals and 20% covers. It varies on the night and the gig. The other 2 only play covers. They are all good bands with great players and playing very good songs. IMO there is no difference to originals or covers, playing both is the best approach to being a good bass player.

It's always disappointing to see the originals guys dissing the covers players. Blinkers are never a good accessory for any musician.

Not dissing anyone by saying I only want to play originals am I? 

[Monkey Steve]

19 hours ago, Al Krow said:

@Monkey Steve you mentioned a "subtle change in direction" being the reason for leaving a band. Left me intrigued - do spill the beans as to what this was?

If it really is something subtle / marginal and not more major is it worth sacrificing a band over? Did the rest of the band follow you out ie did you basically sack the BL? 

Subtlety always makes me think of compressors on pedal boards: something so subtle that no one is going to notice if you forget to switch it on. And definitely not worth sacrificing a pedal board over 😄 

OK, you asked...

We were a thrash band back in the days when that was new and exciting, and having replaced our vomiting dog style singer with one who had a far more classic rock type voice, we were able to find a lot more melody on the songs where previously there had just been tuneless shouting.  I was last into the original line up and has been wanting the old singer out from Day 1 but he was the BL/guitarists best mate and I didn't really get a say.  Me and the drummer had a lot of celebratory pints on the day he quit.

Anyway, taking advantage of this new vocalist, the rest of us were trying to write and arrange songs with bigger choruses, more stripped back verses, etc to let the vocals shine.  Not a massive switch - less Cannibal Corpse and more Anthrax.  But the guitarist didn't like it - if a song didn't have a flattened fifth or an atonal run in it somewhere he'd put one in.  We discussed it with him and he just flat refused to change - he'd started the band, he was going to play what he wanted and only what he wanted and he didn't like songs that didn't have some element to make them (he says) interesting/(we say) difficult to listen to.  Ignoring the fact that by then most of the set was already quite melodic so it wasn't much of a change, more an organic development of what we were already doing.  We weren't looking to turn into Def Leppard.

So there then followed months of grumbling about him behind his back, and every minor point that we were happy to put up with when everything was going OK became a complaint - his playing that had been fine previously and was entirely acceptable for the level we were at was suddenly a bit limited and limiting, his gear wasn't good enough, he didn't own a pair of jeans only baggy jogging bottoms and that was a terrible look on stage, etc. But we'd never got anywhere close to sacking him, not least because it was his band and we were all pretty good mates by then (and my girlfriend was very good friends with his then wife).  He then committed the cardinal sin of playing a new song that he clearly didn't like (but the rest of us did) as badly as possible so that he could refuse to play it live because it sounded awful.

I'd had enough, told my fellow plotters that I was going to force the issue, and announced at the next practice that I was off to start something else as I wanted to do the stuff we'd been talking to him about and he didn't want to do, and I'd see out the remaining gigs that we had booked.  It was all very cordial - I wonder in retrospect whether he was fed up with me constantly writing stuff that he didn't really want to play.  I didn't know that the others would follow me out the door, but I had a pretty strong feeling that they would.  The day after the gig the guitarist rang the others to discuss replacing me and who they could ask, and they both told him "er...well, actually, you'll need to find a drummer/singer too"

I don't regret leaving, but in retrospect it wouldn't have been necessary if we'd made it much clearer that his band was going to fall apart if he didn't make the sideways step that the rest of us wanted.  The shame is that he never played in another band, and sees that one as his big chance, the one that got away.

[Bluewine]

On 16/08/2018 at 05:15, bassbiscuits said:

There's room for originals and covers in this world if you're a gigging muso.

 

Depends on location. There little to no gigs in Milwaukee for Originals bands and actually no paying gigs.

Cover Bands, the label is too broad.

There's the Bon Jovi " Living On Prayer and Journey "Don't Stop Believing" cover bands which is  completely different than covering Howlin Wolf or Slim Harpo.

Blue

Edited August 18, 2018 by Bluewine

[bassbiscuits]

2 hours ago, Bluewine said:

Depends on location. There little to no gigs in Milwaukee for Originals bands and actually no paying gigs.

Cover Bands, the label is too broad.

There's the Bon Jovi " Living On Prayer and Journey "Don't Stop Believing" cover bands which is  completely different than covering Howlin Wolf or Slim Harpo.

Blue

Sure thing. I meant more that there's room in the world for people to do some original stuff of covers depending on what they fancy.

No better or worse. Live and let live and all that. 

I did a nicely paid covers gig last night - I fastidiously choose covers you ain't already heard everyone else playing. 

But then I've spent all day today working on three new original tunes.

Financially lucrative? No chance. Creatively fulfilling? Immensely. 

[Delberthot]

On 12/08/2018 at 04:05, bazzbass said:

I feel sad for you, playing and recording original music is SO much more rewarding than being a jukebox. The thrill of playing covers disappears the second I've learnt it .

To mock an original artist when you are just copying others work seems silly but go for it

 

On 17/08/2018 at 05:12, bazzbass said:

Not dissing anyone by saying I only want to play originals am I? 

 

I believe that you should do whatever makes you happy but you did say that you felt sorry for people who play covers. I play covers, many of us play covers, many of us play originals, many of us play both. There's room for both.

I never wanted to write or play my own material - it does nothing for me but without other people writing and recording music I would have nothing to play.

Many great artists began with and continued to play and record covers of other bands songs. The Chilis have an album that is just covers of songs that they have performed and recorded over the years. Some bands do it just because they like the song, others do it to honour a great band or musician that may no longer be with us

When Jimi Hendrix found out that Cream were splitting up he and the band played an instrumental version of Sunshine of You Love

 

Edited August 19, 2018 by Delberthot

[Bluewine]

3 hours ago, bassbiscuits said:

Sure thing. I meant more that there's room in the world for people to do some original stuff of covers depending on what they fancy.

No better or worse. Live and let live and all that. 

I did a nicely paid covers gig last night - I fastidiously choose covers you ain't already heard everyone else playing. 

But then I've spent all day today working on three new original tunes.

Financially lucrative? No chance. Creatively fulfilling? Immensely. 

I have the best of both worlds. We're a cover band, but we have 3 CDs of originals. However, I prefer performing covers and for me and what I do with bass lines it's very creatively fulfilling.

Unfortunately if we were to play only originals we wouldn't be a thriving gigging band.

I think originals are fine for those local unsigned bands that are not interested in the gigging part of playing.

But let's not forget location. There are some regions in the States where originals bands have a lot of support and there's plentyof paid gigs for them.I can't speak for the UK.

Blue

Edited August 19, 2018 by Bluewine

[TrevorR]

On 11/08/2018 at 07:48, bassbiscuits said:

Nope you were right all along - driving and sh%##ing are still way more fun than band practice. 

 

On 11/08/2018 at 17:22, nobody's prefect said:

Not to sound judgmental, but please tell me you drive first and take substances later? I used to put down a lot of time with a psychoactive substance -- alcohol, in my case -- so I'm by no means a saint, but cars and substances don't mix

Edit: Wait, wait, the word you've masked isn't shooting, it's the other thing, isn't it?

Reasons to quit bands: having different aims than the rest, not being able to sack the one with a different aim, mismatch of aims and time investment, personality clashes, market just not being there for the band's oeuvre...

I thought he was talking about going to the toilet.  It's true, you can't beat a really good dump!

Edited August 21, 2018 by TrevorR
To make the joke a bit clearer...

[martthebass]

This is an interesting, informative thread.......let's please keep it civil.

Edited August 21, 2018 by martthebass

[mep]

9 hours ago, Stylon Pilson said:

And another interesting thread degenerates into the originals vs covers civil war... sigh...

S.P.

Beat me to it. Let's hope it gets back on topic and stays that way.

[Al Krow]

Could someone please explain to me why civil wars are described as "civil"? 😂

[Bluewine]

Back to the topic.

I think it's important to leave your band on good terms. You don't win if you leave in a " huff". Especially if the band has been a good source of income for you.

Me personally, I wouldn't give notice until I was up and running meaning gigging with a new band.

Some might say " why not play with both?" I content it doesn't work if both bands are gigging heavily on weekends.

Blue

 

Blue

[louisthebass]

Main reason why I've had to quit bands is (mainly) down to situations occurring outside of music that have had to take priority. I've never left on bad terms, even on the one occasion when I got an email saying that my services were no longer required as a much more versatile bass player was taking my place. S**t happens, and I have had to (occasionally) resort to quitting by email myself. That said, I've also had to do the face to face thing over the years a couple of times.

In 33 years of playing, most of the bands I've been in have just naturally seen themselves through to a natural conclusion, but even though I'm happy playing with the two bands I'm currently with, there may come another time in the future when I have to put other things in my life first and step down from either (or both).

[Hobbayne]

I quit my band of 10 years shortly after the lead guitarist and singer had a massive row n the car park before a gig and Mr Lead quit and went home.

The singer had no idea how to operate the PA as the lead guitarist always looked after it.

The gig was a total disaster as expected.

The singer/rhythm guitarist couldnt even tune his guitar,  Mr Lead always did it for him.

The drummer was useless and often had no clue that the song had even ended!

Made my mind up when I got home that night.

[uk_lefty]

1 hour ago, Hobbayne said:

I quit my band of 10 years shortly after the lead guitarist and singer had a massive row n the car park before a gig and Mr Lead quit and went home.

The singer had no idea how to operate the PA as the lead guitarist always looked after it.

The gig was a total disaster as expected.

The singer/rhythm guitarist couldnt even tune his guitar,  Mr Lead always did it for him.

The drummer was useless and often had no clue that the song had even ended!

Made my mind up when I got home that night.

Surprised you even made it to the gig! Not knowing how to operate a PA is forgiveable but a "guitarist" not knowing how to tune his guitar, or a drummer not following a song, those are big red flags to me!

[Dad3353]

Mid '70s, I was playing in a variety band around Western France. Regular week-end work, especially during  summer. We had a rare w/e 'off', so I arranged a short trip back to Blighty, to see family and friends. The bass player (Gégé...) and saxo/flute (Joël...) came with me, for the ride. All went well until the ferry back on the Friday. One heck of a storm blew up, and the ferry was unable to dock into St Malo; we had to circle around the Isle of Jersey for thirty-six hours, being tossed about like a cork. The cabins were all opened up, as was the cafeteria (although few had any appetite at all, and keeping a plate on the table, or its contents on the plate, was just about impossible...).It was the first, and only, time that I actually saw folks that were green. Joël lay in a bunk the whole time, suffering the martyr. We were to play, Saturday evening. Pre-mobile phones, of course, but I managed to get a 'phone call from the ship to our BL, explaining that we would not be able to meet the tour bus; he would have to find deps for the three of us.
We were sacked, all three of us, at our next meeting, for having missed the gig. Happy daze.

[burno70]

I've quit a few bands over the years - for exactly the reasons  listed elsewhere, musical differences/personality clashes/crap gigs and live performances. There is one which is a tad different; the singer became a born again Christian then used the band as a vehicle to preach from. It was like Creed II. As an atheist who feels that religion causes more trouble that it's worth this didn't sit well with me. Asked the singer not to bring religion into it but he refused. Unlike the other band members who were also atheist but preferred not to rock the boat (we were a cracking originals band who had begun to build up a following) I couldn't continue and quit. It was a great shame and it left me hugely frustrated at the time.

Incidentally the singer, who is a lovely guy, has contacted be a couple of times since the band folded (well over 10 years ago), to ask if I would re-join as they are looking to get the original line up back together but I just have no appetite for it, despite the cool songs with bass lines I was very much proud of at the time. 

[mic mac moe]

It's a good, broad topic, this. I'm on the verge of walking out of my band due to differences and it's interesting to see how bands up and down the country are so similar. I don't want to start bit ching, suffice to say that I'm the only one who understands the difference between eighth notes and sixteenth notes.... And imagine trying to explain to them how to correct a simple timing error. Add to that a singer who scalps a percentage "for the pa" and add a pinch of "I can't do that gig, the Mrs has booked a holiday" and you wonder why I'm still at it!! 

[Monkey Steve]

27 minutes ago, mic mac moe said:

It's a good, broad topic, this. I'm on the verge of walking out of my band due to differences and it's interesting to see how bands up and down the country are so similar. I don't want to start bit ching, suffice to say that I'm the only one who understands the difference between eighth notes and sixteenth notes.... And imagine trying to explain to them how to correct a simple timing error. Add to that a singer who scalps a percentage "for the pa" and add a pinch of "I can't do that gig, the Mrs has booked a holiday" and you wonder why I'm still at it!! 

what, the singer charges the band to use his own PA, or is he hiring one for the gigs?

[Bluewine]

 

Sorry, this was meant for the "How Was Your Gig Last Night" thread.

ONLY A FEW TICKETS LEFT!

MAPLE ROAD

SATURDAY NIGHT!

8/25/2018

9pm - 11pmMilwaukee Boat Line Cruise101 W Michigan St, Milwaukee WI

We play this gig every year. Any of you guys done this type of gig?

Blue

Edited August 22, 2018 by Bluewine

[tb4sbp2]

The last 'real' band I was in was with decent people and musicians except for the piano/keyboardist. He was good at only one thing (other than being high constantly) and that was very fast honkytonk type of playing. Ask him to slow down or work out a passage and he was lost. Like a guitarist that is amazing at soloing but cannot play rhythm. But he felt like he was the 'musical leader' of the band. After going through a bunch of drummers we were working on a slow country ballad and the bridge part was very important for the female singer to hit the right notes to bring in the guitar solo. I had told the keyboardist and guitarists what the changes were and when he said that I was only the bassist and what would I know about chords that was it for me. I knew I could not work with him after that. Once I left the drummer quit and then the female singer quit so there wasn't much of a band to hold together. 

So to sum it up, be happy with the people you play music. 

Thanks for reading