ubit Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 1 hour ago, Woodinblack said: Yeh, I wouldn't do that. Your relationship, your problem, I am not getting involved! He used me as an excuse and when he saw that I didn’t approve, he stopped telling me. As if I couldn’t see for myself. Eventually when him and his wife split up, I was the bad one because I had “ known all about his infidelity and didn’t say anything” You can’t win. He is my mate , so am I supposed to drop him in it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaulWarning Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 7 minutes ago, ubit said: He used me as an excuse and when he saw that I didn’t approve, he stopped telling me. As if I couldn’t see for myself. Eventually when him and his wife split up, I was the bad one because I had “ known all about his infidelity and didn’t say anything” You can’t win. He is my mate , so am I supposed to drop him in it? I've been in that situation a couple of times, best keeping out of it, talk about being between a rock and a hard place 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyTravis Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 Well. In light of the fact I was “giving up” last year - and some of the tits I’ve been in bands with... my current band mates are ace. Love them all dearly - good people. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woodinblack Posted February 16, 2019 Share Posted February 16, 2019 4 hours ago, ubit said: You can’t win. He is my mate , so am I supposed to drop him in it? No - but getting involved is something I have spent a lot of time trying, so will never be used as an excuse. Obviously in the end you are never going to win but certainly not going to help! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkey Steve Posted February 18, 2019 Author Share Posted February 18, 2019 On 16/02/2019 at 12:05, ubit said: He used me as an excuse and when he saw that I didn’t approve, he stopped telling me. As if I couldn’t see for myself. Eventually when him and his wife split up, I was the bad one because I had “ known all about his infidelity and didn’t say anything” You can’t win. He is my mate , so am I supposed to drop him in it? I've seen both sides of this with old bands In one the singer was less than faithful to his wife, and just thought that it was how blokes behaved. Never used the band as an excuse though, or copped off with any of the punters at the gigs (more that he would make arrangements to meet later) so we never got directly caught up in it. For one earlier band, practice was always on a Sunday evening in a room above a pub. My then girlfriend would drop me off, and the guitarist's wife came with him, and the two wags would disappear for the evening and then rejoin us for last orders in the pub after we'd finished and packed down. When the guitarist's wife left him a couple of years later (after the band had broken up) it emerged that what happened most weeks was that she would get my girlfriend to drop her off somewhere, and pick her up a couple of hours later, and I'll leave it to your imagination to work out what she was up to for that time. I'm so pleased that my girlf took the view that if she told me I'd have to decide whether to tell the guitarist and she didn't want to put me in that position. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ubit Posted February 18, 2019 Share Posted February 18, 2019 (edited) I can’t inderstand cheating. If you don’t want to be with someone, leave them. Why live with someone and live a double life.? I couldn’t cheat even if I wanted. Mrs Ubit and I do everything together. ( to a point ) Edited February 18, 2019 by ubit 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cetera Posted February 19, 2019 Share Posted February 19, 2019 On 13/02/2019 at 15:00, mattbass6 said: Ever since I have an inherent hatred and distrust for keyboard players. True story 😲 😉 Not Rob though.... he's a lovely chap :) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HengistPod Posted February 19, 2019 Share Posted February 19, 2019 Only one guy springs to mind - he was our singer for a while, but is also a bass player so I'd better not go into detail in case he comes on here. Suffice to say, after we left him (his ego was such that he was obviously far more important than us) various musicians came up to us at gigs and expressed amazement that we'd taken him on at all - because he'd shafted them and many other people they knew. Claiming illness on the day of a gig then being seen in the pub a couple of hours later, "borrowing" my bass to jam away to himself at half-time without asking nicely (or at all) and fannying about with the strap, and generally considering himself master of all he surveyed despite being a fat speccy bar-stard. Nowadays he goes out as a midi-backed solo act. He often plays places once and you never see him advertised back there. Can't think why. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mattbass6 Posted February 19, 2019 Share Posted February 19, 2019 3 hours ago, cetera said: Not Rob though.... he's a lovely chap Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, he is a lovely fella. He has his moments though unlike us bass players 😂 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkey Steve Posted February 19, 2019 Author Share Posted February 19, 2019 1 hour ago, HengistPod said: Only one guy springs to mind - he was our singer for a while, but is also a bass player so I'd better not go into detail in case he comes on here. Suffice to say, after we left him (his ego was such that he was obviously far more important than us) various musicians came up to us at gigs and expressed amazement that we'd taken him on at all - because he'd shafted them and many other people they knew. Claiming illness on the day of a gig then being seen in the pub a couple of hours later, "borrowing" my bass to jam away to himself at half-time without asking nicely (or at all) and fannying about with the strap, and generally considering himself master of all he surveyed despite being a fat speccy bar-stard. Nowadays he goes out as a midi-backed solo act. He often plays places once and you never see him advertised back there. Can't think why. hmmm...I'm not going to dig into this any further, but I did once have a band mate who would match a lot of the descriptive elements of this (singer/played bass but not in my band/fat/speccy). However, he was the opposite in attitude - always completely professional, would do a lot of the logistics in arranging the gigs and never, ever let us down, and was generally a lovely bloke. Haven't seen him for the best part of a decade, or played in a band with him for the best part of two decades, so i guess he could have changed... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HengistPod Posted February 20, 2019 Share Posted February 20, 2019 21 hours ago, Monkey Steve said: ... never, ever let us down, and was generally a lovely bloke. Could be the same fellow. We thought he was great to start with, but things went gradually downhill - you start to notice little things that don't quite sit right and so on. It was only after we parted company with him (prompted mostly by me raising suspicions in the whatsapp group and mistakenly copying him in ) that people started talking to us about his previous behaviour in their bands, as well as a couple of projects he'd been involved in afterwards. Such is life, live and learn, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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