Recrystallised using nature's power, apparently

[Rich]

https://reverb.com/item/17839883-collection-elements-water

https://reverb.com/item/17839892-collection-elements-fire

Now, you might think that these look like a pile of old cack, but hold on. These things have been made using a special "*EZO Energy/Space Method of wood, metal, and ctr. treatment." Yeah. Try asking Fender for that.
"Modifications: mass crystallisation (wood), resonating in human emotional range." See? They're not just screwed together, they have a metaphysical birth.

Well worth 120 grand, I reckon.

 

[Dan Dare]

Change the atmospheric conditions? Stone me. I'll have a couple. Fed up with it being cold and damp. Gets in me bones, wot wiv me being 65 and a pensioner, like.

[EliasMooseblaster]

Interesting; I have an uncanny ability to change the atmospheric conditions myself, though I'm not sure it's a feature people would pay money for.

[ahpook]

I'd rather have a bass made using unnatural power.

 

Edited February 12, 2019 by ahpook

[Happy Jack]

You'd think that someone trying to sell half a million quid's worth of ludicrous botched-up rubbish exotic basses could afford to have an actual English-speaking person cast an eye over his immortal prose.

[NikNik]

They look like props from an old Dr Who series,  circa Tom Baker.

I'll pass.

[mingsta]

For £100k+ it's disappointing that so many pubes got under the lacquer. 

 

sbxizis5jvzrj2h3fcw9.webp

Edited February 12, 2019 by mingsta

[NikNik]

3 minutes ago, mingsta said:

For £100k+ it's disappointing that so many pubes got under the lacquer. 

 

sbxizis5jvzrj2h3fcw9.webp

Link not working, dude. 

[musicbassman]

Lets see now...

Purchase this and you'll immediately get a fantastic gig and maybe some New Age friends, although you can't actually really play !

Free enrolment into School of Gullibility !

Contains shakric crystals!

Monks (or something similar) chanting whilst it was made!

Built on a ley line, and then suspended on warm stones for 3 days !

Genuine Realisation Mantra written on old scrolls concealed in neck pocket (plenty of room there) !  

 

[Deanol]

These basses are perception changing, elemental works of nature. They are hand-crafted to free the supertonal characteristics that have been breathed into the forces locked within them. They are a timeless testament to the very heartstones that dwell withing all living things, and which bind us all into one.

I particularly like the fact that they have a price on them that ends "and eighty-five pence", as though they were washing up bowls from Wilko (which, when I think about it, are also full of water)?

[MoonBassAlpha]

5 minutes ago, Deanol said:

 

I particularly like the fact that they have a price on them that ends "and eighty-five pence", as though they were washing up bowls from Wilko (which, when I think about it, are also full of water)?

That's probably just currency conversion from their currency local to where they were made, sorry, breathed into life, the currency being the Papua New Guinean Trundle. Probably. Or the Kow-Pat.

[leftybassman392]

Somebody will buy one. Mark my words.

[yorks5stringer]

Not sure how all the EZO gubbins will react with the plain old acrylic lacquer finish.

[Jus Lukin]

-

Edited March 3, 2022 by Jus Lukin

[Unknown_User]

I have to confess I think that water one looks pretty good.  If it was £120 I'd strongly consider buying it, but even if I won the lottery I wouldn't spend £120k on one just on principle!

[Teebs]

Oooh look! I've designed a bass!

That'll be £120,000 please! 🤑

(and people [yes you @fleabag] slate my drawings!)

[Teebs]

4 minutes ago, Teebs said:

Oooh look! I've designed a bass!

That'll be £120,000 please! 🤑

(and people [yes you @fleabag] slate my drawings!)

Oh yeah, by the way - it's made of diamonds from pluto!

[skidder652003]

ok I offered £11.47, got refused..will it affect my credit rating?

[Teebs]

3 minutes ago, skidder652003 said:

ok I offered £11.47, got refused..will it affect my credit rating?

Yep. You is DOOMED! 💀

[skidder652003]

in fact everyone put in a daft offer with a certain random pence price!

[Happy Jack]

You're wasting your time ... the vendor won't even know about the auto-rejection of your pathetic bids.

Get with the program, guys. 

Everyone send him a private message through eBay offering him three million moonbeams in payment, or a pair of zircon-encrusted tweezers, or a baby's arm holding an apple, or something.

 

[Osiris]

On the water bass the seller forgot to mention what to me is its biggest selling point, namely the crude drawing of a Sci-fi or superhero film villain on the finish.

[TrevorR]

"*EZO or ES Method – Energy/Space Method of wood, metal, and ctr. treatment. 
Modifications: mass crystallisation (wood), resonating in human emotional range.
Sound effects: real presence with element of reverb and chorus.
Developed by Mr. Papian."

 

I was reading this in the ad and I thought, that's familiar. Then I remembered, it's one of Jon Anderson's lyrics from side three of Tales for Topographic Oceans. 

[Newfoundfreedom]

You'd have to be metaphysically born yesterday to pay that for a bass.