Band vent...

[uk_lefty]

Don't reply if I'm boring you senseless, I just need to vent.

I joined an established band three years back and we've really grown in to something last year in particular, great fun, big gigs, reasonably pay for gigs and becoming really good friends to the point we forgive each other of a lot and we socialise away from being a band. 

Recently it's started to get me a little down and frustrated. After a lot of pushing in the last few years mainly by me we have developed a dynamite set. Our "core audience" is basically couples in their early to mid forties at functions or just down the pub, they bloody love big 80's tunes they can sing and dance to but we retain a rock/ bluesy edge. Terrific. 

The band is now getting really complacent and pulling in different directions. We added a couple of questionable songs like Parklife and Sex on Fire. I know. But when people are drunk enough they enjoy it, fair enough their enjoyment is proportional to our getting re booked. However, despite the big 80's stuff being core to our set we are not building on that but doing what I would call random "filler", in the context of this band anyway. Sweet Home Chicago, a guitarists wet dream but boring as hell and not a dancer. Our rule was they gave to both sing and dance to it. Also it just doesn't fit with what we do. Last night we cancelled another rehearsal but hot given more new songs to learn. We are up to seven new songs to learn but we haven't finished the last three new ones. Also we are doing a wedding in two months and nobody has asked the couple if there's any songs they want...??!!

Gigs. We only accept gigs from the drummers friends. This is really limiting us. He controls the email account and if anyone he doesn't know contacts us he either ignores them for weeks or gets awkward with them. Some are obvious wastes of time but many... Well we will never know. So we are stuck doing the same gigs year on year. I've tried getting us other gigs in other nearby towns and got told it's not worth the bother. 

In-ears. Some people now want to play along to a click. Fine, this will improve our timing but I don't want the expense of s proper in ear system, I also like to be on my toes and the danger of it all falling apart of we are not on our game. Another motivation for this was to play samples of horn parts etc. I am very sceptical, we can't all learn one song in a month so how are we going to program horn arrangements, who will buy the software, spend the time on this, adjust for key...? I don't get it. It doesn't suit us. 

I've got a baby arriving at the end of summer so I'm taking two months out. I'm not sure I'll go back. It's a shame because I absolutely love the guys and love the nights when we tear the roof off a small market town pub, but I can't keep trotting out clichéd pub band songs, we were trying to be different now we seem to be trying very hard to be exactly the same. I always wanted to have my own three piece band doing covers and originals, realistically my time to do that was either in my twenties or its yet to come once my kids are older, it's not now. 

Vent over. Sorry.

[silverfoxnik]

Bands - easier to start than keep together. 

'Same as it ever was' , to quote a certain well-known tunesmith. 

[MrDaveTheBass]

This sounds like the 'narrative arc' of many bands that I've been in. Take time to enjoy your new family - before you know it your house will be full of grumpy teenagers, and it'll be time to get that three-piece on the road. 

[Teebs]

Very frustrating 🙁

I hope it sorts out for you & good luck with the imminent arrival 👍

Edited May 9, 2019 by Teebs

[gt4ever]

Sounds like you need some time out and focus on more important things in your life.  Enjoy the early days as much as you can, they grow up quick!  I find most things happen and pan out for a reason most of the time.  Good luck!

[Lozz196]

3 hours ago, silverfoxnik said:

Bands - easier to start than keep together. 

'Same as it ever was' , to quote a certain well-known tunesmith. 

Every time I read these posts I’m reminded of bands gone by, and thank my good fortune for the band I’m currently in.

[jezzaboy]

I have always said this about bands. Small things happen, maybe over the course of a year or two and unless they are nipped in the bud or sorted out these small events all build up to members getting fed up with the situation and walking. I guess most of us have been there.

As the old saying goes, bands are great things apart from the tossers that are in them.

I hope you get your band sorted as it sounds as if it was a good thing at one time.

[NJE]

I’m sure there are loads of folks out there that are far more organised or dedicated than me, but when my son was born 2 years ago, I just naturally gave up most of my playing anyway.

It doesn’t help that my wife works nights a lot of the time in the NHS and I obviously need to be around. I just found I would rather be with him or getting sleep than in a smelly rehearsal room or playing loads of shitty pop/rock/blues music to drunk people in the local watering hole for £50 a night, life is too short and they are only young once.

I just felt like my band/music life was like a cross between Phoenix nights and a musical equivalent of the office.

 

[Quilly]

With good musicians you don’t need to rehearse too much, just do your homework and come prepared . Some bands rehearse every week and still sound terrible