Skinnyman Posted July 5, 2019 Share Posted July 5, 2019 (edited) 24 minutes ago, skankdelvar said: talented Mr Skinnyman takes his rightful place as our national poetaster. Alas, i fear I'll be grazing my nuckles on the inside of my coffin lid by the time the post becomes vacant. Plus, I suspect that in these more enlightened times the Powers That Be would prefer to appoint someone more relevant to today's society than an ageing reprobate like myself. My guess is that it will be that Diseased Rascal chappy (I may have misheard his name but you'll know the one i mean. Stocky cove, fond of hats, appropriately enough....) Edited July 5, 2019 by Skinnyman 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skinnyman Posted July 5, 2019 Share Posted July 5, 2019 20 minutes ago, skankdelvar said: North of England, a bleak and charmless locale where no fashionable gentleman would venture even on a bet. Ooh, Young Teebs won't care for that. Unless, of course, you consider Manchester to be just the top bit of the Midlands and the North to start properly somewhere around Newcastle, ha-way the lads, like, why-aye pet, hinny-man, na-thin....? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stewblack Posted July 5, 2019 Share Posted July 5, 2019 I love hats. On stage off stage, all the same to me. Always loved hats. Caps, beanies, bobbles, pith and other helmets, pork pies, trilbies, sun hats and fedoras. Love them all. Anyone who tells you hats are bad...... Well, they just have a different opinion from me that's all. No less valid than mine. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tauzero Posted July 5, 2019 Share Posted July 5, 2019 7 hours ago, DoubleOhStephan said: Apparently it short for Web Log..?! 🤷🏻♂️ Correct. It's an Americanism, because they're a bit thick and forget the first bits of words. Hence "neighbourhood" becomes "hood" (after becoming "neighborhood" because they can't spell either), "parent" becomes "rent", "suburbs" becomes "burbs", and "magazine" becomes "zine". American independence was actually a way of increasing the average IQ of the British Empire. 3 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davepb24 Posted July 5, 2019 Share Posted July 5, 2019 Tony Pettitt. 'nuff said. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tauzero Posted July 5, 2019 Share Posted July 5, 2019 Anyway, back to the issue at hand. There's nothing wrong with wearing hats. Though our dulcimer player later decided to go for a bowler hat instead. And then Mrs Zero (not in picture) suggested that we make sashes for dancers who were being the gender that they weren't originally made, without the benefit of chemical treatments or surgery, and her and the melodeon player decided that orange would be a good colour. The English can be remarkably ignorant of cultural matters. Happily, we were never booked to play at any Irish club. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skankdelvar Posted July 5, 2019 Share Posted July 5, 2019 2 hours ago, Skinnyman said: Ooh, Young Teebs won't care for that. Unless, of course, you consider Manchester to be just the top bit of the Midlands and the North to start properly somewhere around Newcastle, ha-way the lads, like, why-aye pet, hinny-man, na-thin....? For the avoidance of confusion I lay before you a map which indicates the location of the North of England. 4 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skinnyman Posted July 6, 2019 Share Posted July 6, 2019 48 minutes ago, skankdelvar said: For the avoidance of confusion I lay before you a map which indicates the location of the North of England. That makes much more sense.....thank you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deedee Posted July 6, 2019 Share Posted July 6, 2019 Mrs Deedee bought me a Peaky Blinders style titfer a while ago which I may well decide to model at some gigs in the future. This decision will ultimately hinge on the position of my ever receding hairline weighed against the odds of the band turning into a northern Village People tribute band as a result of my selfish hat wearing. 🤔 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bazzbass Posted July 6, 2019 Share Posted July 6, 2019 (edited) When I see someone with a hat, I know they are a musician, or very cool, or BOTH or.....hiding a bald patch hehe Edited July 6, 2019 by bazzbass 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teebs Posted July 6, 2019 Author Share Posted July 6, 2019 7 hours ago, skankdelvar said: For the avoidance of confusion I lay before you a map which indicates the location of the North of England. M Del Var's map updated: 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teebs Posted July 6, 2019 Author Share Posted July 6, 2019 (edited) Whilst we're on the subject of geography & hats, my guide to headwear of the British Isles... SCOTTISH HAT IRISH HAT WELSH HAT NORTHERN HAT PEAKY BLINDERS HAT SOUTHERN TW*T IN A HAT Edited July 6, 2019 by Teebs 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Riva Posted July 6, 2019 Share Posted July 6, 2019 20 minutes ago, Teebs said: SOUTHERN TW*T IN A HAT “UK Prime Minister makes alternative travel arrangements after refusing to use Eurostar for crunch Brexit talks” 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skinnyman Posted July 6, 2019 Share Posted July 6, 2019 37 minutes ago, Teebs said: SOUTHERN TW*T IN A HAT "Fwar, fwar. All right, Teebs, mate. You can let me down now......Hey, Ricky, I can see your house from here, fwar, fwar." 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teebs Posted July 6, 2019 Author Share Posted July 6, 2019 36 minutes ago, Skinnyman said: "Fwar, fwar. All right, Teebs, mate. You can let me down now......Hey, Ricky, I can see your house from here, fwar, fwar." Teebs - "Die, you feckin' posh-boy twunt!" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skinnyman Posted July 6, 2019 Share Posted July 6, 2019 1 hour ago, Teebs said: Teebs - "Die, you feckin' posh-boy twunt!" Now then, Young Teebs. No politics, remember.... Tsk, tsk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teebs Posted July 6, 2019 Author Share Posted July 6, 2019 Just now, Skinnyman said: Now then, Young Teebs. No politics, remember.... Tsk, tsk. It's got nowt to do with his political affiliations, and more to do with the fact that as a human being, he's a miserable failure! No politics involved! 👍 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leftybassman392 Posted July 6, 2019 Share Posted July 6, 2019 (edited) 13 minutes ago, Teebs said: ...as a human being, he's a miserable failure ...and will shortly be handed the keys to the realm... Edited July 6, 2019 by leftybassman392 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skinnyman Posted July 6, 2019 Share Posted July 6, 2019 15 minutes ago, Teebs said: It's got nowt to do with his political affiliations, and more to do with the fact that as a human being, he's a miserable failure! No politics involved! 👍 And yet he speaks so highly of you. We were chatting in bed the other morning and he said "Fwar, fwar, er, that Teebs, fine chap, Victor Ludorum, semper wotsit, no a little higher, yes, Teebs, sound fellah, fwar, fwar" Honest, not a word of a lie.... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nige1968 Posted July 6, 2019 Share Posted July 6, 2019 13 hours ago, skankdelvar said: When the egregiously drab Carol Anne Duffy handed in her badge I had high hopes for the next incumbent of the office of Poet Laureate. Of course, we ended up with Simon Armitage, a specimen of extreme loathesomeness whose poetic output is limited to a meagre few published collections, these propped up by occasional dribs and drabs of semi-literate doggerel condescendingly lobbed at his fawning adulants rather as a chimpanzee might hurl his fecal matter at a coach party of mouth breathing schoolchildren. That Mr Armitage has stooped to write librettos for modern opera merely compounds rather than alleviates the crushing ennui that befalls me when I hear his name or - worse - his ghastly, nasal voice droning away on Radio Four about inclusion, compassion and his (feigned) affinity for the North of England, a bleak and charmless locale where no fashionable gentleman would venture even on a bet. The repellent Armitage will probably remain in post for some time and it will be with the greatest difficulty that I shall suppress my feverish anticipation for the day when his inglorious tenancy comes to an ignominious and preferably painful end, and the talented Mr Skinnyman takes his rightful place as our national poetaster. Sic transit Gloria Gaynor, as my old pal and drinking buddy Alf Tennyson was wont to say. He knew whereof he spoke. Now *that* is what I call a blog post. Sort of Mr Abusing after anger management. Probably just wants something about bass in there — can we shoehorn in something about Alfred-Lord’s secret double life as a gypsy punk single-bassist? Or maybe Armitage plays cajon? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nige1968 Posted July 6, 2019 Share Posted July 6, 2019 Bit off-top even for off-top again? Soz, where were we? Oh, hats ... https://www.wired.com/2012/05/schrodingers-hats/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T-Bay Posted July 6, 2019 Share Posted July 6, 2019 4 hours ago, Teebs said: M Del Var's map updated: Where’s the south? Is it the same place as the Sarff? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ricky 4000 Posted July 6, 2019 Share Posted July 6, 2019 Nice map! A bit of detail added. 👍 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGreek Posted July 6, 2019 Share Posted July 6, 2019 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.