Just knew I shouldn't have said yes to a band.

[jacko]

On 12/09/2019 at 08:24, BrunoBass said:

Makes me realise how lucky I am to be in a band with people I actually quite like, who learn the songs they’re supposed to learn, turn up on time, don’t miss rehearsals etc. Sure, there are things I’d change if I could, but no one’s perfect, and I’m sure they’d say the same about me. 

 

Not only am I in a similar situation but, believe it or not, the two guitarists will often help lift my Mesa cabs out of the car and carry them into the venue!!!  The only think that could be improved would be getting more gigs.

[redbandit599]

3 hours ago, Meddle said:

Sadly this is often true. 

Find one band's worth of musicians who are:

• Equally mentally gifted
• Have something approaching a business brain
• Have something approaching a work ethic
• Understand and utilise the talents they have
• Don't have some sort of addiction
• Don't have some sort of underlying mental quirk 
• Understand how time works
• None of the members are total jakeballs who 'minesweep' drinks down the pub or who live in a skip

I agree with this, if you are a full time band you can probably cope with not having all the above because time is on your side.

If you are essentially a hobbyist (like me, although we gig pretty regularly 2 or 3 a month) then all those 'rock 'n' roll' traits soon become pretty boring and get in the way. You literally have less time for idiots. I'd say my band ticks those boxes and although we still have the usual diary issues etc. it's the 'easiest' band I've been in - save the drama for the gigs I reckon 🙂

[Hurricane Jimmie]

On 12/09/2019 at 00:49, Marvin said:

we had a belting day

So Anyway, every time I come to Bass Chat, I see a new expression that I can't wait to use.  

 

20 hours ago, Mastodon2 said:

fussed about the instrument

This too!  

I think we've all had spells when music/playing/gigs just wasn't working for us.  Take a break, it'll circle back around. 

[Monkey Steve]

probably says a lot that other musicians being bellends is pretty much standard operating procedure for bands, and in itself not necessarily something that would make me quit the band, and certainly not something that would make me give up music

though my tolerance for it has certainly lessened over the years.  Even then, I can put up with a certain amount of bellendery, but have very little time for those who just aren't up to their role in the band.  The one thing that was a trigger for me in the OP's post was them still not having learned the songs that they were supposed to have learned the previous week.  I've refused to join bands where having turned up at the first practice I'm the only one who knows their parts, or am the only one who cares about not having played the songs correctly.  My rule of thumb is that if I'm clearly the best musician in the room, it's not a very good band

The rest of it would get to me in time though

[Newfoundfreedom]

5 minutes ago, Monkey Steve said:

My rule of thumb is that if I'm clearly the best musician in the room, it's not a very good band

Not much danger of that happening to me. 

[12stringbassist]

Your way forward is maybe to contact your friend and tell him that unless the other people are going to show enough interest and commitment in a stated period, then you are going to depart. That gives him a chance to replace you if he acknowledges that  they aren't going to join in - or even possibly replace them.

[Bluewine]

12 hours ago, Meddle said:

Sadly this is often true. 

Find one band's worth of musicians who are:

• Equally mentally gifted
• Have something approaching a business brain
• Have something approaching a work ethic
• Understand and utilise the talents they have
• Don't have some sort of addiction
• Don't have some sort of underlying mental quirk 
• Understand how time works
• None of the members are total jakeballs who 'minesweep' drinks down the pub or who live in a skip

In other words, good people.

Blue

Edited September 13, 2019 by Bluewine

[Bluewine]

9 hours ago, jacko said:

Not only am I in a similar situation but, believe it or not, the two guitarists will often help lift my Mesa cabs out of the car and carry them into the venue!!!  The only think that could be improved would be getting more gigs.

Getting gigs at the local level I believe is tough everywhere. Someone in the band has to have a keen sense for business and there has to be places to play.

For exanple my buddies that live in New Jersey right outside of Manhatten don't have anywhere near the gigging opportunities we have here in the Midwest. They don't have a festival and fair season like we do.

Are there areas in the UK where there are significantly more gigging opportunities?

Blue

Edited September 13, 2019 by Bluewine

[Bluewine]

8 hours ago, Monkey Steve said:

probably says a lot that other musicians being bellends is pretty much standard operating procedure for bands, and in itself not necessarily something that would make me quit the band, and certainly not something that would make me give up music

though my tolerance for it has certainly lessened over the years.  Even then, I can put up with a certain amount of bellendery, but have very little time for those who just aren't up to their role in the band.  The one thing that was a trigger for me in the OP's post was them still not having learned the songs that they were supposed to have learned the previous week.  I've refused to join bands where having turned up at the first practice I'm the only one who knows their parts, or am the only one who cares about not having played the songs correctly.  My rule of thumb is that if I'm clearly the best musician in the room, it's not a very good band

The rest of it would get to me in time though

What do you guys think of this?

In my neck of the woods it's hard to put demands on people when theres no gigs or money in it.

I'm sure that " I didn't have time to learn the material" wouldn't fly with a Pro touring band.

Blue

[Pragmatist]

This is why I have always been a home guitarist. No desire to play in a band at all. 

[stewblack]

I was in a band once where we all learned the material from demo cd's the band leader and songwriter gave us. 

He was in charge, set up the band, wrote all the material  However he gave us compete artistic freedom to come up with our own parts. A perfect arrangement. 

Except for TMWHTD. Just didn't bother. One rehearsal he casually dismissed the BL with 'oh you never gave me a CD'

BL didn't respond just reached into the drum stand box and pulled out said CD from where TMWHTD had tossed it the week before. 

I don't do ultimatums, it's egotistical, confrontational and unhelpful but it became an 'I go or he goes ' situation. So I went. 

In that scenario we just couldn't move forward with one guy winging it - not with original material.

Nowadays one of my covers bands features a young guitarist who rarely bothers to learn material, but we get paid, he's a great showman and I'm older and wiser. I now recognise what other people say and do is none of my business. 

[Happy Jack]

On 11/09/2019 at 20:36, Marvin said:

I quit bands, and music, everything at the beginning of the year. I sold almost all my gear, bar 2 basses and a bag of leads. People said don't, but I'd had enough.

Then I got asked by someone I said I would be in a band with, the only person I'd be in a band with, I owed him really. And am I regretting it. All the same old crap. People not learning songs, not bringing gear, can't pay for rehearsals blah blah blah.

Musicians are such utter moronic wasters.

I really wish you'd bring back your original avatar (said the man living in a glass house).

[Dan Dare]

16 hours ago, Bluewine said:

In my neck of the woods it's hard to put demands on people when there's no gigs or money in it.

True. If a band is merely a group of people who do it for fun, with no aim or goal (gigs, fame and fortune, sex, drugs, etc), then one cannot (and should not) attempt to crack the whip at them. They are paying to be there, after all. It's different if there is paid work at stake, of course. 

[Marvin]

9 hours ago, Happy Jack said:

I really wish you'd bring back your original avatar (said the man living in a glass house).

I'm assuming you're referring to the modified "Apple Logo". I haven't used that one for about 8 years @Happy Jack  😁. You've a very good memory

[Bluewine]

13 hours ago, stewblack said:

I was in a band once where we all learned the material from demo cd's the band leader and songwriter gave us. 

He was in charge, set up the band, wrote all the material  However he gave us compete artistic freedom to come up with our own parts. A perfect arrangement. 

Except for TMWHTD. Just didn't bother. One rehearsal he casually dismissed the BL with 'oh you neve

Nowadays one of my covers bands features a young guitarist who rarely bothers to learn material, but we get paid, he's a great showman and I'm older and wiser. I now recognise what other people say and do is none of my business. 

Very interesting, We have our first gig with our new lead guitarist next weekend. A 4 hour gig. Weve reheased with him twice and gave him a cd of our live show . He couldnt make it to rehearsal this week. He's 25 a family man and student. He's a talented guirarist and singer. He came to us through our drummer. I'm not to keen on either of them 

But, you know what., I'm keeping my mouth shut. I'm 66 twice the age of all other members now. I'm old school and these guys think very differently about everything. They're young and smart and the gigs keep rolling in.

I'm lucky to have this job.

I'm lucky to get to the gigs and home without getting lost. I'm old I can't fight these youngsters.

Don't you feel sorry for me? 😄

Blue

[Bluewine]

13 hours ago, stewblack said:

I was in a band once where we all learned the material from demo cd's the band leader and songwriter gave us. 

He was in charge, set up the band, wrote all the material  However he gave us compete artistic freedom to come up with our own parts. A perfect arrangement. 

Except for TMWHTD. Just didn't bother. One rehearsal he casually dismissed the BL with 'oh you neve

Nowadays one of my covers bands features a young guitarist who rarely bothers to learn material, but we get paid, he's a great showman and I'm older and wiser. I now recognise what other people say and do is none of my business. 

Very interesting, We have our first gig with our new lead guitarist next weekend. A 4 hour gig. Weve reheased with him twice and gave him a cd of our live show . He couldnt make it to rehearsal this week. He's 25 a family man and student. He's a talented guirarist and singer. He came to us through our drummer. I'm not to keen on either of them 

But, you know what., I'm keeping my mouth shut. I'm 66 twice the age of all other members now. I'm old school and these guys think very differently about everything. They're young and smart and the gigs keep rolling in.

I'm lucky to have this job.

I'm lucky to get to the gigs and home without getting lost. I'm old I can't fight these youngsters.

Don't you feel sorry for me? 😄

Blue

[stewblack]

Hey Blue, I like your attitude 

[Marvin]

I lasted 2 practices, and I say practices in the loosest sense of the word.

Wednesday was the worst practice I've ever been to, an utter shambles. They hadn't even attempted to learn any of the songs. Neither guitarist bothered to bring a single lead (they had to borrow my spares). One guitarist didn't have his amp and couldn't even remember where he'd left it. That same guitarist turned up stoned off his face and went on to get more stoned...so I've walked. It'd be a miracle if this ever made it out of the practice room 

Trying to land a spot with 'better' musicians isn't particularly feasible. It's a closed shop in my experience, they all play musical band chairs. 

So I'm done. Wednesday concentrated many of the reasons I dislike bands into 3 hours, and why I'll not be playing again.

[Bluewine]

4 hours ago, Marvin said:

I lasted 2 practices, and I say practices in the loosest sense of the word.

Wednesday was the worst practice I've ever been to, an utter shambles. They hadn't even attempted to learn any of the songs. Neither guitarist bothered to bring a single lead (they had to borrow my spares). One guitarist didn't have his amp and couldn't even remember where he'd left it. That same guitarist turned up stoned off his face and went on to get more stoned...so I've walked. It'd be a miracle if this ever made it out of the practice room 

Trying to land a spot with 'better' musicians isn't particularly feasible. It's a closed shop in my experience, they all play musical band chairs. 

So I'm done. Wednesday concentrated many of the reasons I dislike bands into 3 hours, and why I'll not be playing again.

I still contend that bad band experiences happen to those who are playing with the wrong guys. Good sober people could mean good band experience.

I joined a band years ago and after the second rehearsal I knew these guys were only getting together to get drunk. I never returned after that srcond rehearsal.

Blue

[Bluewine]

Gtreat Musician and Good gigs will not get you through times with bad people.

Good people will get you though times with bad gigs and bad situations"

Blue

[T-Bay]

1 hour ago, Bluewine said:

I still contend that bad band experiences happen to those who are playing with the wrong guys. Good sober people could mean good band experience.

I joined a band years ago and after the second rehearsal I knew these guys were only getting together to get drunk. I never returned after that srcond rehearsal.

Blue

It’s more than that though, one of my bands looks to be winding down. It was started with an agreement on the sort of music we were going to be playing but after 6 months the vocalist started vetoing songs that fitted perfectly with the original genres and suggesting stuff that didn’t (70s disco songs for a band formed to play 80s-90s alternative rock) and the drummer is happy to go along. Everyone in the band is sober reliable and I love rehearsals but the music being suggested is stuff that I hate. A case of the classic ‘musical differences’ I suppose. It’s frustrating as it’s a band full of people I really enjoy being in a band with but can’t see a way to find enough music to fit in a common ground. It would be fair to say that the vocalist was perhaps a little reticent to say what she really wanted to be doing at the start, it would have saved a lot of time if she had though as you need to be honest so people are all comfortable with a project.

 

[Marvin]

On 14/09/2019 at 12:14, Happy Jack said:

 

 

Edited September 15, 2019 by Marvin

[Bluewine]

8 hours ago, T-Bay said:

It’s more than that though, one of my bands looks to be winding down. It was started with an agreement on the sort of music we were going to be playing but after 6 months the vocalist started vetoing songs that fitted perfectly with the original genres and suggesting stuff that didn’t (70s disco songs for a band formed to play 80s-90s alternative rock) and the drummer is happy to go along. Everyone in the band is sober reliable and I love rehearsals but the music being suggested is stuff that I hate. A case of the classic ‘musical differences’ I suppose. It’s frustrating as it’s a band full of people I really enjoy being in a band with but can’t see a way to find enough music to fit in a common ground. It would be fair to say that the vocalist was perhaps a little reticent to say what she really wanted to be doing at the start, it would have saved a lot of time if she had though as you need to be honest so people are all comfortable with a project.

 

It really depends on what your in the band for or what you want out of it. If your in this to play a certain type or genre, that might be a challenge.

There are nany things about my band that are far from perfect. I never complain because I'm getting text messages everyday to confirm new bookings.

I'm in this for the money . I'll complain when the gigs dry up.

Blue

 

[T-Bay]

4 hours ago, Bluewine said:

It really depends on what your in the band for or what you want out of it. If your in this to play a certain type or genre, that might be a challenge.

There are nany things about my band that are far from perfect. I never complain because I'm getting text messages everyday to confirm new bookings.

I'm in this for the money . I'll complain when the gigs dry up.

Blue

 

Sadly moving the way the vocalist wants would reduce chances of bookings locally, we have had a grand total of two gigs so far and thankfully I don’t have to rely on it for my income. I expected the first 6 months to be gig free but the attempts at trying to shift direction just mean we are stuck in a cycle as she wants to dump stuff we already know which keeps us from being gig ready as well.

 Your situation as a professional is very different, being a job you have to roll with it to at least some degree. You always seem to be enjoying yourself and you post up some amazing gigs so it’s working for you which is good.

[Newfoundfreedom]

The last two posts pretty much mirror perfectly my thought process when I recently left my band. If you're earning good money then you don't mind putting up with a bit of cr@p. If you're in it for the enjoyment and it stops being enjoyable, what's the point?