Ever feel like selling up and quitting?

[Nibody]

Thats me at the moment. Getting too old for this crud. Every hurdle that could be put in a bands way from relationship problems to illness.. you name it we've hit it. On paper Im in a very privelidged position - contacts I could only have dreamed of when I was starting out, a band consisting of basicaly pro studio and mastering engineers, two albums worth of demo stuff that is mindblowingly better than anything I have writen in the past.. access to a top end studio to record our first track with a bloody great engineer and studio downtime for rehersals.. a bloody good videographer for video.. you name it. But a bit like the Hollies song "King midas In Reverse" - every time we start moving forward something happens and any advances turn to dust before our eyes. I remember Phil Lynott once describing thin Lizzy as "it it wasnt for bad luck we'd have none at all".

Got to the point now picking up a bass has become a chore. I have fallen out of love with playing and have developed massive self doubt. GAH. Rant over. But seriously I am considering sticking the whole ruddy lot on ebay and saying sod it.

[knirirr]

Yes, I did reach that point around 20 years ago. Various other things (work and hobbies) cropped up plus the band I was in folded due to members getting jobs elsewhere, I thought that the jam scene sucked and was also afflicted with massive self doubt. Of course, no-one wanted to buy my gear then so I kept it, but never used it.

Eventually, last year, this changed. Perhaps you may also find that a break is of use - with luck it won't be so long.

[jazzmanb]

Never been my main job,always a paid hobby .Had 10 years plus gaps with no bands or gigs but always picked a bass up . Some of it is a chore but the good parts far outweigh 

[chris_b]

The last 2 years have been two steps forward and one step back for me, but no, never once thought about quitting.

[SpondonBassed]

24 minutes ago, Nibody said:

Got to the point now picking up a bass has become a chore. I have fallen out of love with playing and have developed massive self doubt. GAH.

Ouch.

If you, with your experience and contacts, can still feel like that what point is there in amateurs like me practising?

Another way of looking at it is; if you, with your experience and contacts, can feel like that, I'm not the only one...

My sympathy.  I have periods when I feel the same way.  One of them lasted for thirty years.

Edited October 14, 2019 by SpondonBassed

[Barking Spiders]

I like playing, I like getting together with mates to play at a few small  festivals and I like coming up with the occasional tune that I think doesn't suck. But, I don't have the temperament to be a pro musician as I hate pubs gigs (don't actually like pubs, well being indoors in them anyway), wedding do's and playing the same old shoite time after time. As soon as it starts becoming routine I've always left bands. There are peeps who  have the right mindset for being a musician.  But, before doing owt rash and sticking all your gear on EBay, just put it into storage for a year or so and mebbe you'll get the urge to play once more.

[caitlin]

I had a brief pop at being pro, I wanted to be a musician when I was tiny but my idiot parents made me do school and become *successful* or something. The sheer amount of *work* to do music compared with other jobs makes it a vocation, or an addiction if you ask me. If you can't do anything else then it's pretty easy to stay 1000% committed to it.

I've certainly had slumps where I feel like chucking it all in, but I am addicted. I'm just getting old enough where most bands wouldn't want me and I've really had to refocus what I want music to mean to me. I couldn't be *bothered* to practise drums because without a band to practise for I didn't have a reason to. I went back and got some 'lessons' which turned more into hanging out with another drummer and talking rubbish, but it revitalised my love for drums and playing them for sake of it, learning things because they're hard and they sound great and being able to just sit down and enjoy grooving for half an hour.

Learning a new instrument is certainly revitalising my love of music, I am terrified of the prospect of future auditions with an instrument I can't play 1% as well as I drum.

The other thing I feel is tough is that thing where the better you get at an instrument the more aware you are of how bad you suck at it. As time's gone on, the only thing I've got is more critical of my playing, getting through that and enjoying my own ability a bit more has been lovely.

Work is always horrid, if it was super fun they wouldn't need to pay you

[Bassfinger]

I've always had low expectations, and I haven't been disappointed! Sure, when I was a teenager me and my mates wanted to be the next Black Sabbath, but made no real effort to play beyond school and the youth club.  I've done a pub band stint well in the past, and one day may do so again in the future, but I play to pass the time, for the challenge, to be better than I was the day before, and for the simple pleasure of doing so.  

I'm a professional in another field, done well out of a divorce (ex wife was a company director and much wealthier than me, so it was a nice pay day when I discovered she'd been playing the pink oboe elsewhere), had extreme luck with a property sale, and not being one to waste money on stupid German cars have managed to salt away a fair bit over the years.  I'm nearly 51, and when the mortgage is paid the month after my 54th Birthday I'm retiring, won't need to work at all.  If I'd concentrated on music there's a small chance I might have made it big, but more likely I'd be the same age I am now but one helluva lot worse off instead.  That being the case, I'm quite happy playing for my own pleasure without music being linked in my mind to bad memories of missed opportunities and failure.

Edited October 14, 2019 by Bassfinger

[steantval]

It is always this time of year where I start to feel like packing it in.

I’m the only one in the band who seeks out and books gigs etc, if I didn’t do it the band would have no work.

I am now contacting venues for gigs 2020, most of them we have already played at this year, it is so frustrating as it involves multiple phone calls, texts and emails to the venues to obtain dates, soul destroying.

Edited October 14, 2019 by steantval

[fretmeister]

Every day.

[Delberthot]

These threads pop up every so often so you're not the only one. I nearly jacked it in earlier this year but things have changed for the better and am enjoying playing again

[Marc S]

I quit playing a long time ago, and had a break of almost 25 years
However, I'm back now, and loving it - despite all the usual set backs

My biggest regret ever, was giving up all those years ago! I really feel like I wish I'd persisted back then, and often wonder just how much better I'd be now
Yes, we all have huge set-backs, rows, bands splitting, dealing with difficult punters and landlords, problems with health (self and others)
but my advice would be stick with it - you may end up really regretting it if you give up.... just like I did

have a short break if you feel you need it. Re-assess your situation, play with some different musicians - go to a couple of jam sessions, and just do it for fun

But, Don't quit, don't quit and don't quit, and finally, whatever you do - Don't quit!
Best of luck finding your solution
 

[pmjos]

If you are a musician at heart and its part of you, you will always find a way to be yourself. As for the hassle.................I discovered that the best way is to be the most hassle and then everyone has to put up with you 🙂 My band members bugger about I sack them. T'others soon get the idea.

[Heathy]

I've never felt like quitting altogether, but have had a couple of periods of downtime. Once of these involved a 'cleansing' exercise, which involved selling everything and buying different stuff. This was a lot of fun as you can imagine.

[TheGreek]

Ups and downs....it would only be natural if we didn't have times when we felt like chucking it all in...becomes an inspiration when we fall in love with it again...

Hang in there...or sell me your gear cheap...

[Reggaebass]

Never crosses my mind ever,    but I’ve had a few short breaks because of work , but  it’s a big part of my life, and it’s here to stay 🙂

[Bassman Sam]

3 hours ago, Nibody said:

Thats me at the moment. Getting too old for this crud. Every hurdle that could be put in a bands way from relationship problems to illness.. you name it we've hit it. On paper Im in a very privelidged position - contacts I could only have dreamed of when I was starting out, a band consisting of basicaly pro studio and mastering engineers, two albums worth of demo stuff that is mindblowingly better than anything I have writen in the past.. access to a top end studio to record our first track with a bloody great engineer and studio downtime for rehersals.. a bloody good videographer for video.. you name it. But a bit like the Hollies song "King midas In Reverse" - every time we start moving forward something happens and any advances turn to dust before our eyes. I remember Phil Lynott once describing thin Lizzy as "it it wasnt for bad luck we'd have none at all".

Got to the point now picking up a bass has become a chore. I have fallen out of love with playing and have developed massive self doubt. GAH. Rant over. But seriously I am considering sticking the whole ruddy lot on ebay and saying sod it.

Been there, done that. Still get  GAS and buy basses that  I will never gig. Can't be arsed

though.  Just enjoy the occasional jam.oh  and after 50 years of gigging,  I still think I'm crap

Edited October 14, 2019 by Bassman Sam

[bassfan]

Only when I have to pack up after every gig and load the car. 

[spongebob]

+1 to the OP. I'm at that very point now!

Edited October 14, 2019 by spongebob

[Stub Mandrel]

1 hour ago, caitlin said:

The other thing I feel is tough is that thing where the better you get at an instrument the more aware you are of how bad you suck at it.

That's true of anything in life.

When you need to reach a level of proficiency to be able to identify your own faults, you are getting somewhere.

[Stub Mandrel]

3 hours ago, Nibody said:

Thats me at the moment. Getting too old for this crud. Every hurdle that could be put in a bands way from relationship problems to illness.. you name it we've hit it. On paper Im in a very privelidged position - contacts I could only have dreamed of when I was starting out, a band consisting of basicaly pro studio and mastering engineers, two albums worth of demo stuff that is mindblowingly better than anything I have writen in the past.. access to a top end studio to record our first track with a bloody great engineer and studio downtime for rehersals.. a bloody good videographer for video.. you name it. But a bit like the Hollies song "King midas In Reverse" - every time we start moving forward something happens and any advances turn to dust before our eyes. I remember Phil Lynott once describing thin Lizzy as "it it wasnt for bad luck we'd have none at all".

Review what you want to achieve. Don't be afraid to take a break, but consider the reward of getting an album out and think about what the real barriers are. If you have great demos and access to resources, perhaps you just need to lose someone in the food chain and replace them? Or tell them 'shape up or ship out' which may be kinder or crueller depending on their sensitivities.

P.S. Phil got that from Cream - Born Under a Bad Sign

P.P.S. <googles> Who nabbed it from Albert King

P.P.P.S Who cadged it off Lightning Slim (1954) according to Wikipedia!

Sorry for the thread drift...

Edited October 14, 2019 by Stub Mandrel

[chris_b]

 

2 hours ago, caitlin said:

The other thing I feel is tough is that thing where the better you get at an instrument the more aware you are of how bad you suck at it.

That's the point when you roll your sleeves up and improve your playing.

Edited October 14, 2019 by chris_b

[Guest kmac84]

It doesn't have to be as drastic as quitting or not quitting (as long as its not your main income). Just tie up any loose ends with recording and gigs and take a break, the urge will probably come back, and if it doesn't, then why force yourself into doing something you don't really want to do? 

[DJpullchord]

I really can’t imagine not playing bass or guitar. 

[NancyJohnson]

I did sell up everything 20+ years ago.  Stupid big rig, too much gear.  Got an invite to go and play with a newly forming covers band for someone's birthday.  I was kind of on the back foot from the outset, covers really are not my thing at all, but I went along to help more than anything else.  When I got back, my wife asked how it had gone and I just questioned everything, even down to the point of why I was even bothering doing band stuff.  Everything went...a huge SWR and Trace tri-amped rig, several basses.  One guy took an old Hamer Scarab and another head (Laney, I think) and offered me a 1979 Fender Precision in a trade.  This sat under a bed for a little while until I got an offer else where and it all started again.

I actually found the whole experience quite cathartic. Out with the old and in with something older.  Of course I went back into things with a gusto.  After the mortgage was paid I was in double figures for Gibson Thunderbirds alone - all gone to fund two Lulls.  I'm down to five basses now and a smallish Darkglass/Barefaced amp set up.