Bass Myths, share ones you've heard

[ubit]

22 hours ago, Raymondo said:

Worked for me so must be true !

And me. Back in the 90's when we were playing a lot, I used to have to fight them off with a poo like stick!

[mcnach]

14 hours ago, Bobthedog said:

 

I have to say that for me having a lined fretless is pointless (although my fretless is lined) as I simply cannot see the lines on the fretboard at all. I can only see the side of the neck. 

 

Hmmm, you need to work on expanding that belly then...

 

 

[jezzaboy]

13 hours ago, Jean-Luc Pickguard said:

My missus came out with a good one, she said "you don't need another bass"

Actually she says that quite often.

Grounds for divorce right there my man!

[julfam]

"this bass is best for metal" (and replace metal with whatever style you like)

"this isnt the right bass for this style"

"Fender MIA are better than MIM"

"My bass is limiting me"

"I need that other bass for a project"

"I can recognise XYZ bass on this soundclip" (at best you recognize if that's a JB/PB/MM)

"Those two JBs are night and day" (while probably playing 2 Fender JB with different sets of strings and/or setup and/or amp, and/or amp and/or a few days apart)

"Leo got it right the first time"

 

Edited June 29, 2020 by julfam

[Yukimajo]

"If you're a female player you need a short scale bass." If you can get past the sexism on display here, you just have to look at the evidence. I guess no-one told Suzi Quattro that did they? She's only 5 foot nothing and seemed fine with a full scale P bass.

"All bass players do is go Thump Thump Thump" - Said to me by someone who doesn't play ANY instruments at all. 

[goingdownslow]

"Less is more".

[Richard R]

1 hour ago, LukeFRC said:

I had come from a indie pop band and had the shocking idea of playing quavers with the odd passing note. That church’s band was not Prepared for that...

Woe unto him who playeth on the G string.

 

[ClassicVibes]

The Class D has no heft thing. 

[fretmeister]

11 minutes ago, goingdownslow said:

"Less is more".

Only scum say this.

 

[ahpook]

Sharing equipment with other musicians will always result in disaster.

[Silvia Bluejay]

Plus one to the utter rubbish of referring to one's bass as 'she'. I'm not sure if it's more sexist, creepy or plain weird. Makes my skin crawl. (Same in the case of those idiots who refer to boats, ships and cars as 'she'.) Whenever I've referred to my basses as 'he' in revenge, I've been immediately corrected - bl**dy foreigner that I am - and told it's IT in English, not HE. Oh, really? 🤦‍♀️

Short scale only for wimmin - heard that, never took any notice. BUT:
- Petite lady? Get a Jazz bass, the neck is lovely and thin, you'll be fine. (Forget about the horrible, misshapen, heavy-as-hell body, though, will you).

Heh.

Edited June 29, 2020 by Silvia Bluejay

[LukeFRC]

2 minutes ago, Silvia Bluejay said:

Plus one to the utter rubbish of referring to one's bass as 'she'. I'm not sure if it's more sexist, creepy or plain weird. Makes my skin crawl. (Same in the case of those idiots who refer to boats, ships and cars as 'she'.) Whenever I've referred to my basses as 'he' in revenge, I've been immediately corrected - bl**dy foreigner that I am - and told it's IT in English, not HE. Oh, really? 🤦‍♀️

Short scale only for wimmin - heard that, never took any notice. BUT:
- Petite lady? Get a Jazz bass, the neck is lovely and thin, you'll be fine. (Forget about the horrible, misshapen, heavy-as-hell body, though, will you).

Heh.

Sexism in music is a whole other topic...

[Silvia Bluejay]

Just now, LukeFRC said:

Sexism in music is a whole other topic...

I agree, and I'm not trying to open that can of worms. The Jazz bass for petite women is my contribution to the bass myths this thread is about.

[fretmeister]

8 minutes ago, Silvia Bluejay said:

Plus one to the utter rubbish of referring to one's bass as 'she'. I'm not sure if it's more sexist, creepy or plain weird. Makes my skin crawl. (Same in the case of those idiots who refer to boats, ships and cars as 'she'.) Whenever I've referred to my basses as 'he' in revenge, I've been immediately corrected - bl**dy foreigner that I am - and told it's IT in English, not HE. Oh, really? 🤦‍♀️

Short scale only for wimmin - heard that, never took any notice. BUT:
- Petite lady? Get a Jazz bass, the neck is lovely and thin, you'll be fine. (Forget about the horrible, misshapen, heavy-as-hell body, though, will you).

Heh.

I get the ship thing as it's been around for so long.

IIRC the russian navy calls it's ships He.

 

But the rest - it's a cringy as giving an inanimate object a name. My views on that match those of The Hound in Game of Thrones.

 

 

WARNING - very rude words ahead.

 

 

 

[BassTractor]

2 hours ago, chris_b said:

Wood makes no difference. . . . . . . . means I don't understand physics.

Of this one, a particular version I just love is:
"Wood makes no difference. It's physics, you know!"

[ClassicVibes]

Female fronted band.

Hahahaha! Okay... 

[Bobthedog]

2 hours ago, mcnach said:

 

Hmmm, you need to work on expanding that belly then...

 

 

On the basis I already look 8 months pregnant, I am not sure that is a good idea. 😲 😁

[Frank Blank]

Just now, Bobthedog said:

On the basis I already look 8 months pregnant, I am not sure that is a good idea. 😲 😁

I think I'm about to give birth to twins...

[oldslapper]

Myth Esperanza Spalding 

Myth Gail Anne Dorsey 

Myth Suzie Quatro 

Ive heard of all of these. 
 

Sorry, it’s been a slow day so far today. I’ll put Bargain Hunt on. 

[gjones]

On 28/06/2020 at 08:20, SICbass said:

Playing bass in a band will get you girls.

Possibly double bass?

But playing electric bass makes you invisible.

[stewblack]

I often refer to a bass as 'she' I suspect those who don't get it simply aren't hearing me correctly. The post is usually intended to be read in Swiss Toni style voice. 

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=mtoyLPROLZI

Edited June 29, 2020 by stewblack

[Maude]

1 hour ago, gjones said:

Possibly double bass?

But playing electric bass makes you invisible.

Bass myth. Playing electric bass makes you invisible. 

Lemmy, Phil Lynott and Flea would like word with you. 

[Lozz196]

2 hours ago, stewblack said:

I often refer to a bass as 'she' I suspect those who don't get it simply aren't hearing me correctly. The post is usually intended to be read in Swiss Toni style voice. 

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=mtoyLPROLZI

Do you ply it with fine wines & Belgian chocolates, Stew?

[TwoTimesBass]

"It practically plays itself"

Well how come it plays better when someone else is playing it...?! 😫

[stewblack]

1 hour ago, Lozz196 said:

Do you ply it with fine wines & Belgian chocolates, Stew?

Always. Plying a bass with fine wines and chocolates, Lozz, is very much like making love to a beautiful woman.