Bassistclem Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 Has anyone ever played a gig in a Sergeants mess when the emergency services have not been called? Seriously... Played a Christmas party at one this month and true to form two ambulances and a police presence were required. Two of my previous experiences actually required the fire service attend. Thankfully no musicians or equipment were lost in proceedings!!! I have played several over the years and this is a genuine question, I am interested to know 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bassfinger Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 I never made it as high as Sergeant so the answer is no, but I can Imagine. I wonder as well if it might vary with the military branch and regiment, perhaps? In the Green Jackets we'd fight anyone we could, and if no one else was available we'd happily fight each other. The Matelots aren't much better either, but I think the Crabs are a little more restrained. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lozz196 Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 My mate who did the full 22 in the RAF Regiment said the same, fighting anyone was preferable to no-one. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldslapper Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 No but dep’ed for a band playing for Royal Engineers officers mess pre tour bash in a marquee at the barracks. When we plugged in all our kit (pa, backline, lights, plus disco and mobile bar fridge) into provided sockets, there was a bang and all the power went down. We followed the trail of 4 gang sockets that all led to one extension lead plugged into a socket in the kitchen. The mess colour sergeant was very apologetic and (quietly) chuntered that “if it were a foot soldiers party, there would have been generators, etc. but what do you expect from the “Ruperts”. Makes you proud. 😂 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve Browning Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 A band I was in, set off some bloke when playing at Sandhurst. The 4 girls in the band did the most beautiful version of Runaway by the Corrs. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve Browning Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 33 minutes ago, oldslapper said: No but dep’ed for a band playing for Royal Engineers officers mess pre tour bash in a marquee at the barracks. When we plugged in all our kit (pa, backline, lights, plus disco and mobile bar fridge) into provided sockets, there was a bang and all the power went down. We followed the trail of 4 gang sockets that all led to one extension lead plugged into a socket in the kitchen. The mess colour sergeant was very apologetic and (quietly) chuntered that “if it were a foot soldiers party, there would have been generators, etc. but what do you expect from the “Ruperts”. Makes you proud. 😂 Makes you think Arthur Wellesley had it right. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jakester Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 Did a gig over in Germany after Kosovo. We were told to get our food from the main mess tent, but not to go back in there after 9pm as it was all going to kick off (and it did). It was a tolerated way to let the soldiers let off steam, apparently. Another gig I did was at a Gurkha base; it was with a swing band, and it was a period fancy dress theme. We were warned before we went out to play this under no circumstances should we laugh at the Gurkhas in fancy dress, as it wouldn’t have ended well for us! 👀 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bassfinger Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 Derinitely don't pith off a Gurkha. We fronted a trio of them at Gib and were expecting fists to fly. We were bitterly disappointed when they just smiled and nodded and shuffled away. The next morning we awoke to find red felt tip pen marks across our throats. The adjutant went chuffing nuts and had some most uncomplimentary things to say about Gurkhas, but the rest of us were rather in awe to say the least. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Horse Murphy Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 Before I went to university I was in a band of American chaps called the AB Blues Band who toured the US army/ airforce bases in the UK (what a great gap year). I must say, the Americans are a darn sight more reserved and well-behaved than their UK counterparts (especially the lads down in Portsmouth!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yorks5stringer Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 Once did a gig at an Eton Mess and the Police looked the other way ( satire)! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve Browning Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 13 minutes ago, Old Horse Murphy said: Before I went to university I was in a band of American chaps called the AB Blues Band who toured the US army/ airforce bases in the UK (what a great gap year). I must say, the Americans are a darn sight more reserved and well-behaved than their UK counterparts (especially the lads down in Portsmouth!) I miss the constant circling of the fleet of Navy Provost vans in Pompey during the evening. 🙂 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lozz196 Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 37 minutes ago, Bassfinger said: Derinitely don't pith off a Gurkha. We fronted a trio of them at Gib and were expecting fists to fly. We were bitterly disappointed when they just smiled and nodded and shuffled away. The next morning we awoke to find red felt tip pen marks across our throats. The adjutant went chuffing nuts and had some most uncomplimentary things to say about Gurkhas, but the rest of us were rather in awe to say the least. I remember reading about a military exercise where the Gurkhas had to “invade” a guarded base overnight. Apparently the next morning the guards were well chuffed that they hadn’t tried, til they stood up and all found their bootlaces had been tied together in the night without them noticing. Def don’t pith off a Gurkha. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rich Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 My brother in law spent time with the Gurkhas when he was posted in Brunei back in the day. He reckons that they are a.) the most charming, friendly and loyal people you could wish to meet, and b.) triple-hard little sods who you do not want to annoy in any way, shape or form whatsoever. The Argentinians on the Falklands were absolutely terrified of them and their kukris for very good reason. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raymondo Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 In the late Nineties I played lot's of military bases here in the UK and also in Germany . I can honestly say that I never saw any actual "fights"....lot's of mucking around, acting out bravado but no real fights. In fact I always hated playing Sergeants Mess gigs. they were by far the most ..stuck up their own derrières! Other Ranks .... bloody brilliant laugh... join in with everything and they would always help with the load in/ load out. Officers Mess... jeez ...Sodom and Gomorrah had nothing on these guys! But they always treated us well....let us join in the fun after playing and fed us brilliantly. Sergeants mess...what a bunch of stuck up pr*cks they always were... never allowed to mix...stuck away in a changing cupboard with a few stale sandwiches and cans of warm beer...hated them ..in fact we refused to play them after a while because they were always such miserable affairs.. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Len_derby Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 There’s some brilliant stories here, keep ‘em coming. I’ve not played a military base (yet). The nearest to it was when me and a mate did a sloppy camping and busking trip in the south of France in 1984. We got permission to play in a bar in a small town called castelnaudary and lay down a hat for tips. Unknown to us was the fact the town had the Foreign Legion induction barracks. As the evening went on the atmosphere became more rowdy as off-duty instructors got drunker and louder. Luckily we were saved from any harm by our accents. A sergeant instructor from Chesterfield took us under his wing. We turned down no song requests that night, even when we had no idea how to play them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Horse Murphy Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 The best one we had was a very drunk Captain come up to us and ask if we did requests. We asked him what he wanted and he said "oh, anything...." 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trueno Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 I’ve played quite a few Military bases, never had any problems… including Sergeants’ Mess gigs. I always thought that posh weddings were far worse. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lowdown Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 (edited) I seemed to have made a career out of forces gigs...apart from the usual functions and Xmas shows in this country... I have done tours during the 1970's and 80's of Germany (USAF, British and Nato bases) with various Soul and Rock acts. A good part of the 90's working on the British CSE tours, backing a lot of the TV Celebs and older pop acts. The shows were mini production shows with three or four turns and a bunch of dancers, a tour manger, along with lighting and sound crew etc...There was a pool of us, about 25 musicians, so you would go out a few times a year on two week tours. The same players and MD's, just different combinations. Apart from personal Instruments, all the gear was provided. These tours included, The Falklands and Ascension islands, again Germany, Cyprus, Belize, Northern Island and a couple of the Highland camps and bases. Plus Kuwait and Saudi a few days after the first Gulf War. Every show, without fail, the show folks would be hosted in any of the Junior ranks mess', Sergeants mess' or the Officer club/mess for a meal and a fosters up. It was their way of saying thank you. They all tried to out do each other. They had to be better than the previous venue... I must say, each rank was as bad as each other for Shenanigans and Boozing. The further you got away from the UK, the more outrageous they got. From CSE tours in Belize and The Falklands. Edited December 21, 2021 by lowdown 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bassfinger Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 2 hours ago, Rich said: My brother in law spent time with the Gurkhas when he was posted in Brunei back in the day. He reckons that they are a.) the most charming, friendly and loyal people you could wish to meet, and b.) triple-hard little sods who you do not want to annoy in any way, shape or form whatsoever. The Argentinians on the Falklands were absolutely terrified of them and their kukris for very good reason. Someone had started a rumour that Gurkhas were cannibals - Argentine conscripts couldn't surrender quickly enough! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lowdown Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 2 hours ago, Rich said: My brother in law spent time with the Gurkhas when he was posted in Brunei back in the day. He reckons that they are a.) the most charming, friendly and loyal people you could wish to meet, and b.) triple-hard little sods who you do not want to annoy in any way, shape or form whatsoever. The Argentinians on the Falklands were absolutely terrified of them and their kukris for very good reason. The Gurkhas made the best Curries. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bunion Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 7 minutes ago, lowdown said: The Gurkhas made the best Curries. They did indeed I was on tour with them, but they also lost the English language when you wanted them to do something for you that required sweating 😂🤣 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jakester Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 4 hours ago, Jakester said: Another gig I did was at a Gurkha base; it was with a swing band, and it was a period fancy dress theme. We were warned before we went out to play this under no circumstances should we laugh at the Gurkhas in fancy dress, as it wouldn’t have ended well for us! 👀 4 hours ago, Bassfinger said: Derinitely don't pith off a Gurkha. We fronted a trio of them at Gib and were expecting fists to fly. We were bitterly disappointed when they just smiled and nodded and shuffled away. The next morning we awoke to find red felt tip pen marks across our throats. The adjutant went chuffing nuts and had some most uncomplimentary things to say about Gurkhas, but the rest of us were rather in awe to say the least. The worst thing was they did look absolutely hilarious - it was like something from the Bugsy Malone, only with knives. No one dared crack a smile though! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bunion Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 9 hours ago, Bassistclem said: Has anyone ever played a gig in a Sergeants mess when the emergency services have not been called? Seriously... If the officers and/sergeants mess get lively it’s called “mess rugby” if the ordinary ranks get lively it’s in front of the RSM in the morning 😄 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raymondo Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 One of the most impressive things I saw whilst playing the bases was one at Padeborn in Germany, an "other Ranks" Hawaiian beach party held in December. We got there to find that it was to be held outside in the bloody freezing snow. The stage was a Tank transporter trailer and the ground all around had been covered in tons of sand. The party was brilliant and didn't stop until the early hours of the morning. We emerged from the floor of a Squadie's bedroom ( five of us in the band ... we had arrived too late to get into our hotel!) at 6.30 am to find that there wasn't a grain of sand left to be seen . Amazing organization! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lowdown Posted December 21, 2021 Share Posted December 21, 2021 (edited) 29 minutes ago, Bunion said: If the officers and/sergeants mess get lively it’s called “mess rugby” if the ordinary ranks get lively it’s in front of the RSM in the morning 😄 I once witnessed an officers mess (drunken) game which was a 'Jousting' contest. One officer would sit on the shoulders of another officer (the horse). The one sitting on top (the knight) had one arm outstretched with his fist clenched. Then on a signal, they would charge another knight on his horse and try to knock them over. This would go on until someone fell off. Also, bets were being taken. At some point, a senior office entered and stopped it. He explained to all the idiots who were engaging in the Jousting competition, that when you sit on the shoulders of someone else, you are in fact, quite a bit taller and.... very likely that you will hit your head, or worse, decapitate yourself on the ceiling mounted, spinning tropical fan....these were officers... Edited December 21, 2021 by lowdown 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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