Ugly Basses

[chris_b]

4 hours ago, dmccombe7 said:

We are a funny ole lot on BC. That old vintage look is what many seek in life.

I quite like the sunburst and tort combo. . . . . .

 

This.

 

My first proper bass was a Fender Precision (Burst/Tort/Rosewood), bought in 1969. My last bass was a Sadowsky Jazz (Burst/Tort/Rosewood), bought in 2017. There has been a world of innovation in the intervening 48 years, but these guys just look and sound like basses to me.

[peteb]

4 minutes ago, chris_b said:

 

This.

 

My first proper bass was a Fender Precision (Burst/Tort/Rosewood), bought in 1969. My last bass was a Sadowsky Jazz (Burst/Tort/Rosewood), bought in 2017. There has been a world of innovation in the intervening 48 years, but these guys just look and sound like basses to me.

 

As they do to virtually every producer and band leader out in the real world... 

 

[rushbo]

1 hour ago, Baloney Balderdash said:

 

 

 

 

 

When I die and go to hell, possibly because of all those Joni Mitchell albums I borrowed from Birmingham Music Library and taped without permission, this is the instrument Lucifer himself will hand to me. I will then join four other doomed musicians holding dreadful, unsuitable instruments and will be condemned to play "Mustang Sally" to a half full room of bored partygoers, until the end of time.

 

[Newfoundfreedom]

1 minute ago, rushbo said:

When I die and go to hell, possibly because of all those Joni Mitchell albums I borrowed from Birmingham Music Library and taped without permission, this is the instrument Lucifer himself will hand to me. I will then join four other doomed musicians holding dreadful, unsuitable instruments and will be condemned to play "Mustang Sally" to a half full room of bored partygoers, until the end of time.

 

 

I like it! 😁

[rushbo]

1 minute ago, Newfoundfreedom said:

 

I like it! 😁

 

Some people will look upon this bass and their hearts will be filled with joy. I'm sure it sounds great and the build quality is magnificent, but it really is my worst nightmare.

 

For context, when I see a nicely worn in Fender Precision with the early 70's logo and a tort scratchplate, I get a warm, tingly feeling. 

[BigRedX]

Who thought that ideal colour match for an exotic blue top would be an anaemic featureless piece of "natural" wood?

[Grimalkin]

2 hours ago, Baloney Balderdash said:

Bizarre for sure, but I actually kind of really like it.

 

Like a piece of modern art.

 

As for ugly, by far most "whale hump" single cut basses, only ever seen a couple of those that I actually liked the look of, otherwise it looks like something that has been deformed by some sort of horrible decease to me, like suffering from elephantiasis at an advanced stage, also those kind of speckled/splashy/smeared color finishes, which gives me bad amateur abstract painter with absolutely no sense of aesthetics, or "fresh" mass produced 80's wallpaper, vibes, especially when the colors used are blue and yellow mixed, which seems to be a very common choice for some reason for this kind of finish, strangely enough most often seen on high end boutique basses, I also have kind of an aversion against very pronounced flamed maple top basses as well.   

 

To me the above mentioned looks like very bad and somewhat kitschy, in the worst possible sense of the word, taste, like wannabe artistic, but being a completely talentless absolute cliché failure at it.

 

Like these:

 

Especially the first one though.

 

Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) I couldn't find a picture of the one that had me banned from Talk Bass for speaking my honest mind about it looking horribly ugly (it wasn't even owned by the poster, just a random image they found on the internet ), trust me it would have beaten any of the above pictured basses in butt ugliness, however that is even possible.

 

Also this thread would have earned everyone participating in it a permanent ban had it been on the Talk Bass forum.

 

 

 

The Age of Aquarium...

[rushbo]

5 minutes ago, BigRedX said:

Who thought that ideal colour match for an exotic blue top would be an anaemic featureless piece of "natural" wood?

There is so much going on with this bass, that a piece of exotic, highly figured wood, would have just added to the chaos. It's a bit like ordering a pizza - you choose two or three toppings, so you can really taste them - if you just heap everything on it, you get a weird, unpalatable mess. You can still eat it, and bits of it will taste great, but you'd only ever order it once.

 

[BigRedX]

Just now, rushbo said:

There is so much going on with this bass, that a piece of exotic, highly figured wood, would have just added to the chaos. It's a bit like ordering a pizza - you choose two or three toppings, so you can really taste them - if you just heap everything on it, you get a weird, unpalatable mess. You can still eat it, and bits of it will taste great, but you'd only ever order it once.

 

My pizza analogy would be that instead of a proper tasty pizza-dough base that shows off the flavours of the topping, you've been given the cardboard or polystyrene packing.

[Newfoundfreedom]

57 minutes ago, rushbo said:

 

Some people will look upon this bass and their hearts will be filled with joy. I'm sure it sounds great and the build quality is magnificent, but it really is my worst nightmare.

 

For context, when I see a nicely worn in Fender Precision with the early 70's logo and a tort scratchplate, I get a warm, tingly feeling. 

 

Now that's my worst nightmare. 😆

[msb]

1 hour ago, rushbo said:

When I die and go to hell, possibly because of all those Joni Mitchell albums I borrowed from Birmingham Music Library and taped without permission, this is the instrument Lucifer himself will hand to me. I will then join four other doomed musicians holding dreadful, unsuitable instruments and will be condemned to play "Mustang Sally" to a half full room of bored partygoers, until the end of time.

 

An old friend used to go on about how he hated music , he did have a stereo and the entire Joni Mitchell discography. When I asked about that it was said to aid him in the quest of getting lucky.

Fair enough…

[Baloney Balderdash]

1 hour ago, rushbo said:

 

Some people will look upon this bass and their hearts will be filled with joy. I'm sure it sounds great and the build quality is magnificent, but it really is my worst nightmare.

 

For context, when I see a nicely worn in Fender Precision with the early 70's logo and a tort scratchplate, I get a warm, tingly feeling. 

A P Bass I can get behind, though I do prefer a narrower fretboard and a reverse oriented P pickup, and Tortoise pickguard used to be on my top bass aversions list too.

 

That is until recently at least where I bought a Harley Benton GuitarBass (their take on the Fender Bass VI concept), which only comes in sunburst finish with a tortoise pickguard, and it has actually been growing on me, as in now I actually think it is a pretty nice looking instrument, depsite the less favorite finish and the previous much hated tortoise pickguard, mind I would still have preferred a matte black finish, black hardware, and maybe a 3 layered white/black/blood red pickguard, but I can totally live with it as it is.  

 

Edited September 25, 2022 by Baloney Balderdash

[Woodinblack]

4 hours ago, rushbo said:

For context, when I see a nicely worn in Fender Precision with the early 70's logo and a tort scratchplate, I get a warm, tingly feeling. 

 

I do too. I am guessing though it isn't the same warm tingly feeling

 

[tauzero]

All P basses look the same to me, regardless of colour. Ditto J basses.

[dclaassen]

5 minutes ago, tauzero said:

All P basses look the same to me, regardless of colour. Ditto J basses.

Not to me…:)

[Rib13Bass]

10 minutes ago, tauzero said:

All P basses look the same to me, regardless of colour. Ditto J basses.

 

Thread derail: I just noticed your screename.....I read a book by Poul Anderson with that title ..... best explanation of general relativity in a fiction format 

 

 

Back on topic: any black P Bass with a white pickguard looks like a budget bass to me, regardless if it cost 50 dollars or 5000 dollars.......not an ugly look, but a cheap look

Edited September 25, 2022 by Rib13Bass

[peteb]

5 minutes ago, Rib13Bass said:

 

Back on topic: any black P Bass with a white pickguard looks like a budget bass to me, regardless if it cost 50 dollars or 5000 dollars.......not an ugly look, but a cheap look

 

Unless you're the ghost of Phillip Lynott, every black P bass should have a tort scratchplate...! 

 

Edited September 25, 2022 by peteb

[tauzero]

12 minutes ago, Rib13Bass said:

Thread derail: I just noticed your screename.....I read a book by Poul Anderson with that title ..... best explanation of general relativity in a fiction format 

 

That's the book that caused me to use this username.

[nilorius]

10 hours ago, Clarky said:

Take a look here:

 

https://www.notreble.com/buzz/2022/09/19/bass-of-the-week-wood-guerilla-basses-babytulip/

Looks like ugly streetburger.

[nilorius]

8 hours ago, tauzero said:

 

Don't forget the Lodestone.

 

The first 2 has a work of zombie.

[dclaassen]

5 minutes ago, tauzero said:

All P basses look the same to me, regardless of colour. Ditto J basses.

Not to me…:)

[Passinwind]

On 22/09/2022 at 02:19, Osiris said:

Not the design but the finish. Sunburst and/or tort are disgusting enough on their own, but when combined they are truly hideous 🤢🤮

Just add gold hardware for the holy trinity of awful bass aesthetics! 

 

It needs a gold ashtray. 😎

Edited September 27, 2022 by Passinwind

[dmccombe7]

The desire for every other finish but sunburst / tort is just a passing fad. You will eventually come back to the classic finish that we all love eventually .

Its tradition and we all love tradition. 😂

You just dont realise it yet 

Dave

[neepheid]

1 hour ago, dmccombe7 said:

The desire for every other finish but sunburst / tort is just a passing fad. You will eventually come back to the classic finish that we all love eventually .

Its tradition and we all love tradition. 😂

You just dont realise it yet 

Dave

 

Just about the time the free bus pass comes through, eh?

[dmccombe7]

9 minutes ago, neepheid said:

 

Just about the time the free bus pass comes through, eh?

Jings i forgot to get my bus pass 2 yrs ago.  

Once i get the bus pass i'll look at a matching sunburst / tort P bass. 

Dave