When did you realise….. you weren’t going to “make it”?

[cetera]

I was in a 'signed' band (European and Japanese distribution) that did a few cool shows but saw zero money and always had some 'Manager' or 'A&R' man making rubbish decisions. How do you pay the bills?

I'd been running/playing in a KISS tribute as well at the same time that was a good regular payer, to decent audiences that sang every word and also involved well paid overseas gigs and tours so I chose that. Enjoyed the 'perks' for 25 years, including picking up endorsements with my two fave bass gear companies, until I realised the band was looking stale and my back was suffering. Moved over to the theatre circuit with a rock covers show and get my kicks there now. Get paid and in bed by midnight. 

Edited September 13, 2023 by cetera

[Supernaut]

2012 was the closest I got. Kerrang magazine had taken an interest in us but half the band had already become alcoholics... 

[ahpook]

I don't ever think I did, apart from some groundless dreaming in my late teens.

 

I've only ever wanted to be in a band with nice people, making good music and having fun doing it.

 

And that's when I've been happiest.

Edited September 13, 2023 by ahpook

[BigRedX]

I'm in my early 60 and I still haven't realised.

 

As others have said it very much depends on what constitutes "making it". For me it would be earning enough money from my musical activities so I didn't have to do anything else in order to be able to pay the bills. The closest I've got to that was when I was in my 50s and in The Terrortones who after the first year were completely self-sustaining financially.

 

TBH I probably don't have what it takes in terms of drive and commitment. Sure I like gigging, recording and writing and pretty much everything that goes with being in a band, but I don't live and breath music every single waking hour which is what is really required. In the past when I plenty of time and energy to put into being in a band and playing and writing music, I was too stupid and naive to realise this. These days I have too many other commitments. That's not to say I haven't stopped dreaming, because IMO the moment you stop dreaming you might as well sell all your musical gear.

 

IME trying to tailor your music/band/image to "make it" the less likely it is to happen, because you are always going to be behind the wave. My most successful musical ventures have been the ones where I haven't worried about what other people thought of us but simply got on with the process of making and playing music. We worked hard (although in retrospect not nearly hard enough) and the "luck" happened. The Terrortones was simply supposed to be a bit of creative fun to do in-between my covers band gigs. I ended up having to quit the covers band because The Terrortones were far more successful both in terms of the number of gigs we were getting and financially.

 

I'll carry on writing music, playing in bands and gigging until I'm not longer physically able, and then I'll be composing and releasing weird music on Bandcamp from the comfort of my studio until I die.

[cheddatom]

I was on bass in a 3 piece band and we were so f*cking good it was a nailed on certainty. We desperately sent demos and press packs, signed with various promoters and managers. Nothing ever really happened but that wasn't my problem, I just had to keep getting better at the bass and it'd all take care of itself... then the drummer left and I was suddenly confronted with the reality of the situation. We were never going to get anywhere. 

 

Anyway, that lead to me switching to drums and I'm having a great time in the most successful band I've ever been in. We've got pretty far without any "deal" although hopefully we're going to get some help to push the next album. None of us think we're going to "make it" but a lot of our fans think we already have

[Newfoundfreedom]

I don't know how you would even quantify "making it" in this day and age. 

 

Big money record deals are mostly a thing of the past, except for the exceptional few, and even mega huge bands aren't making a lot from recording thanks to streaming services. 

 

 

 

 

[ezbass]

Probably the moment that I realised that what I actually wanted from life was just to be happy, which probably explains my ‘all over the map’ working life. I was 16 and at my first job interview, the executive who interviewing me (a really nice guy) noted that I was a musician on my application and, quite rightly, wanted to see where my focus was and how it would impact my commitment to working for the company. I remember saying, “I really just want to be happy,” or words to that effect. It was a revelation to me at the time, as I’d never considered it before. Would turning pro/making it have made happy? Quite likely, but for a long time, I just let life happen to me, rather than making it happen and that isn’t how one makes it, as far as I can see. I would have liked to have toured, just once, still would, but seems unlikely, although not impossible.

[ezbass]

3 minutes ago, Newfoundfreedom said:

I don't know how you would even quantify "making it" in this day and age.

Depends on your own point of view. Some would say earning a living, others, having some celebrity status and others, having a successful album/song release.

[Rodders]

When I was 17/18, I had a dream of being a "session bass player" in studios, cruise ships, all that stuff. Went for a scholarship at a music school in London, down to the final 4 or 5 I think, (picture in BGM woo! 😂) but didn't get it. 

Then realised I wouldn't have coped in London by myself at that age, by then the decision was made anyway as my mum had decided to spend the money I needed to go..

 

So I just set about playing in the evenings and weekends with as many different bands/acts of different styles as possible, jam nights, open mics etc from that point on and have not looked back since.

[BigRedX]

9 minutes ago, ezbass said:

Depends on your own point of view. Some would say earning a living, others, having some celebrity status and others, having a successful album/song release.

 

We were having this very conversation while packing up after rehearsal last night. Our synth player said it would be hearing one of our songs unexpectedly on the radio or as background music to a TV programme.

[Kitsto]

Spent my whole like dreaming of being a rockstar. Reached my 60s. Got a gig in a good local covers band. Hated it. Hated playing live (alternating between terrified I couldn't play the song to being bored when I could). Hated band politics. Hated having zero input to the setlist. Hated humping gear in and out. Hated the waiting around. Loved rehearsals. Loved playing bass. Now stay home (am fully retired) and play bass all day to backing tracks. Couldn't be happier - especially having put to rest that stupid dream. 

Edited September 13, 2023 by Kitsto

[Rayman]

1 hour ago, cetera said:

I was in a 'signed' band (European and Japanese distribution) that did a few cool shows but saw zero money and always had some 'Manager' or 'A&R' man making rubbish decisions. How do you pay the bills?

I'd been running/playing in a KISS tribute as well at the same time that was a good regular payer, to decent audiences that sang every word and also involved well paid overseas gigs and tours so I chose that. Enjoyed the 'perks' for 25 years, including picking up endorsements with my two fave bass gear companies, until I realised the band was looking stale and my back was suffering. Moved over to the theatre circuit with a rock covers show and get my kicks there now. Get paid and in bed by midnight. 

The man with more Spectors than the rest of us put together 😆

 

I remember the Kiss thing….

[cetera]

Just now, Rayman said:

The man with more Spectors than the rest of us put together 😆

 

I remember the Kiss thing….

Ahem!! You mean the rest of Europe put together

 

🤣

[Rayman]

I’m such a massively creative person, I can’t imagine not playing and writing, but I have to have a reason. Stupid as it sounds I have always struggled with playing for fun. There has to be a point, a direction….. writing, recording, gigging…. support slot… radio play or Spotify hits….. something to have as a goal. To this day, I don’t see the point without those ambitions. Sad really.

[BigRedX]

1 minute ago, Rayman said:

I’m such a massively creative person, I can’t imagine not playing and writing, but I have to have a reason. Stupid as it sounds I have always struggled with playing for fun. There has to be a point, a direction….. writing, recording, gigging…. support slot… radio play or Spotify hits….. something to have as a goal. To this day, I don’t see the point without those ambitions. Sad really.

 

I'm in a band. That's reason enough for me. 

[Fionn]

It was my burning ambition during my teens and 20’s, but the possibility seemed to ever ebb with time. I had all but given up on the idea, moved to a remote island for a hermit’s life (literally). Then weirdly my fortunes changed, and the dream of my youth became reality.

 

It’s not over til it’s over, I guess.

 

So long as there’s an ember.

 

 

[diskwave]

Seems there's two aspects here. "Making it" ie fame and fortune (good luck with that as a bass player)  and then simply becoming a working musician earning good money.  The guys I still admire are the ones who stuck at it and then become first call for say a touring act or a TV show...That kind of thing....real work, real money, and to some extent some sort of celebrity what ever that means.

[Rexel Matador]

I was desperate to "make it" from around mid teens to mid 20s. I assumed I'd get a record deal and make a living. I assumed that any touring band, however obscure was paid a living wage for their troubles! I eventually got involved in the DIY punk scene in Birmingham and the penny dropped - all of these bands are scraping by and fitting this labour of love around their shitty jobs, just like me.

I've been thinking about this a lot lately as my wife is pregnant with our first child. At my school, it was a case of get good A-Levels and go to university, or nothing. It would have been nice if, rather than telling me that only a miniscule fraction of bands ever get anywhere so it's better not to bother, someone had helped me seriously look into all the more realistic ways I might have been able to combine my passions with earning a living.

Not that I have anything to complain about. If I had "made it", I would have succumbed to the cliches of rock 'n roll excess pretty much immediately and probably wouldn't be telling you all this today!

 

I'm arguably more into building basses than playing them these days - so now the dream if for someone else to "make it" on one of my creations!

[PaulWarning]

Trouble with 'making it' in so far as getting just enough money to make a living from it, is it gets to be a hard slog, once the novelty of getting gigs that are reasonable well attended all over the country and Europe has worn off it gets to be hard work, travelling, hanging about for hours on end etc.

The older you are with the reasonability's and declining energy and enthusiasm that comes with that the harder it is 

[MacDaddy]

 

 

[hiram.k.hackenbacker]

I don’t think I ever thought I would. I certainly had no designs on doing so.

I guess we all wonder what it would be like, but that’s as far as it went for me.

[BigRedX]

Making a living out of music is hard work just like any other job. It appears there are still too many people who thinks it's like the lyrics to "Money For Nothing".

[SumOne]

I don't remember ever seriously thinking I'd be a famous professional musician, so I guess I realised very early on I won't 'make it'. Even if it was offered to me now I'd have to consider long-term job security, if I'd actually want fame, time away from home and family, and if it'd turn music into a stressful job rather than fun - it'd have to be quite a good offer for me to give up the day job and do it.

 

There have been times where I have felt I have 'made it' as a musician:  being paid, playing at a decent festival, radio play, being on fliers & posters, DJing in a big club on a Saturday night, signing a contract with a record label and releasing music. 

 

Things I still aspire to do to which I haven't given up on yet: Go on tour (even if just a series of gigs around the UK over the space of a week), have music released on vinyl, album or tour advert on a billboard, radio play from a big national station like Radio 1.  

[Cat Burrito]

As an up and coming musician for 35 years now, I fail to understand the question!?! 

 

Seriously though, I hit 25 in the late 90s, realised I'd done three bands that hadn't quite gotten as far as I hoped and then at 26 got married. I decided shortly after that, that I needed to grow up (I'd ran the three bands so wasn't far down the career ladder / mortgage route, compared to friends). I had a forced halt on music for 4 years to try and catch up, but missed playing. I now feel that the pressure is off, I have enjoyed the last 20 years more than ever. 

 

My father was pro in the 60s, playing music he hated which ultimately made him quit music permanently. I've never been full time but have always played music that I am passionate about. So, in many respects, I feel I have had the most success. 

[Moose]

I never wanted to become rich and famous, but a little recognition would have been nice. Over the years, I watched people with far less musical ability become household names while I was left wondering why it was. When I was about 30 years old, I realised that talent and ability are not enough. People really don't care how much musical talent you have or how hard you work, they want something else. Call it the X factor or charisma. Whatever it is, I don't have it and the penny finally dropped: I realised that the world didn't want me.

It would have been very easy to become bitter about the situation but I didn't. At 74 years of age, I am still playing in a working band and will continue to do it for as long as I can. I don't care that the world doesn't want me - I don't really want the world.