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I can't find a Band, What am I doing Wrong?


thebrig

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Having just read Count Bassy's thread "Facing up to Reality", I can relate to what he's saying big time.

 

Sorry, this is a bit long-winded.

 

Simarlarly, my last proper band played our last gig in December 2019, since then, I have put so much time and effort into trying to find a new band, or form one myself, I've put countless adverts on Join My Band and BandMix, and the amount of timewasters that apply is unbelievable.

 

I've been doing for nearly five years now, and I still haven't found a band, and for this reason, I have just listed two top quality basses in the "For Sale" section because I just can't justify owning them if I'm no longer in a band.

 

In my ads, I describe myself as a solid player who is reliable, happy to learn the songs at home so that I'm fully prepared for gigs and rehearsals, I have good gear and transport, I clearly state the type of music I want to play, and I can provide links to my playing if required.

 

When covid first started, I began recording a few bass covers for a bit of fun and uploading them to the bass covers channel I created on YouTube, and I still keep adding to my channel on a regular basis.

 

The tracks I play along with are either purpose made tracks that contain no bass at all, or are the original tracks with the bass removed using special software, so the bass parts you hear on the recordings are my own, I play through a Behringer U-Phoria UMC404HD Audio Interface straight into Reaper.

 

I only took up playing at the age of 55, never had any lessons, I just listen to a song and learn by ear, I know I'm not the greatest bass player around, and I know my level, which is only local pubs etc, but am I that bad a player that no band wants to give me a go?

 

This is the link to my YouTube channel that I usually send to anyone who asks for evidence of my playing, if you think that I'm doing something wrong, please say so because I'm 73 next week and I've decided to call it a day if I still haven't found a band by the New Year.

 

I have no ego whatsoever, so you can be as brutally honest as you wish, I do tend to shy away from the better bands because I lack self-confidence, but the "not so good" bands don't seem to "want me for whatever reason.

 

https://www.youtube.com/@thegeezer284/videos

Edited by thebrig
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My advice, for what it’s worth, is to get out there and do some networking at open mics and jam nights. You will need to be open about what genres of music you play and will, definitely, “kiss a few frogs”. But, you will be mixing with people who actually want to play live music. One of the best bands I’ve played with came about after I saw a solo singer/guitarist at an open mic and said ‘would you like a bass player to join you?”. 
Good luck, and don’t give up!

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Having listened to a few tracks I’d describe your style as steady. As such I’d be looking at the better bands, you’re not going to be playing anything that gets in the way but your playing will provide a good foundation for great guitars and vocals on which to shine. 

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Finding a band is very much like finding a job , it seems so much easier when you are currently in a band ( or in a job ) 

 

Most of my successful band joining have been from getting to know other musicians, I also approached a solo singer /acoustic  guitarist in a pub and offered some fretless bass and backing vocals , which resulted in quite a few gigs . 
I would rather stick an advert up in our local music shop ( if you still have one ) than try the social media type thing .

I think you are doing everything you can , sometimes we just go through a “ drought “ period .

I am not too fussy or judgmental, I will initially play with just about anyone.
I have joined some pretty ropey bands , but it gets me out rehearsing and sometimes you really click with one member who can introduce you to better opportunities.

 

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2 hours ago, thebrig said:

This is the link to my YouTube channel that I usually send to anyone who asks for evidence of my playing, if you think that I'm doing something wrong, please say so because I'm 73 next week and I've decided to call it a day if I still haven't found a band by the New Year.

 

I have no ego whatsoever, so you can be as brutally honest as you wish, I do tend to shy away from the better bands because I lack self-confidence, but the "not so good" bands don't seem to "want me for whatever reason.

Just watched some vids so that all seems rather fine.

 

You seem calm and confident on the videos - maybe the "not so good" bands don't think you'd be interested?

 

You're obviously not a flash, "pushing the envelope" type of player but in a lot of busy working bands, that fits the bill.

 

Don't be afraid to go for any gig- the worst they can say would be no which lets face it is the answer to the majority of applicants to any sought after position.

 

And remember the best player definitely doesn't always get the job- personality and work ethic often are more important traits.

 

Unless finance dictates that you have to sell your gear, don't. It's enough justification that you like and enjoy it. You know what will happen- you'll get rid of it all and then almost immediately somebody will offer you a gig lol!

 

Also maybe consider bands that are not *entirely* within your ideal genre- variety can be good fun also.

 

Best of luck to you.

 

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1 hour ago, Lozz196 said:

Having listened to a few tracks I’d describe your style as steady.

 

I agree with Lozz. You're a no frills, competent player. Don't shy away from applying to any band because of lack of self-confidence. A lot of bands want someone on bass who can simply nail it down and isn't going to try to steal the show from the soloists, tread on anyone's toes or try (and fail) to be the next Jaco. You fit that bill fine. You just have to keep plugging away, putting yourself about (open mic's, jams, etc)  and applying for things. Most people will tell you honestly if they don't think you're right for the job. Accept it and move on to the next.

 

As others suggest, don't dismiss anything because you never know where things can lead. So don't be too hasty to write off the "not so good" bands. If joining one gets you out playing, it's a bonus and you can always work on getting them to improve. Someone may see you out playing and approach you (it's happened to me).

 

It's in the nature of sites such as Join My Band and BandMix that you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you meet a handsome prince. When you say you get a lot of timewasters applying, what do you mean exactly? It's been my experience that I've had to do the applying on JMB and BM, rather than the other way around. Do you mean you apply to something that sounds potentially good and you are disappointed when you get there? That's the way the cookie crumbles, I'm afraid.

 

EMG456 is right. The best player definitely doesn't always get the job. Personality and work ethic and how well you click with others are often are more important. As he advises, unless finance dictates that you have to sell your gear, don't. You never get what it's worth and it's likely that you'll get rid of it all and be offered a gig.

 

Bon chance.

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Have you thought about contacting some tribute bands? You appear to like your classic Rock and are laying it down. I sometimes dep in a nationwide Status Quo band for example and from that, I've met loads of like-minded players and got involved in a number of projects. Not one specific band but plenty of gigs with some great players.

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I’m in a similar boat although I’ve been in bands for most my life until this year. 

Possible idea is start your own band saying classic rock band project looking for competent lead guitarist. 
Find him then new ad saying looking for drummer 

Finally find that singer 

I’ve done this more than join as you find it more to your liking in songs, who you choose to play with etc 

If you live in Suffolk or Norfolk then you’re like me there isn’t many bands around at the moment! 

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I can't add much to what else has been said, apart from this. The vids don't sell you.

 

Yes, your playing is solid and competent, fine and ideal for the music. But the visuals aren't. You don't need to jump around, but maybe you should stand and just look more engaged.

 

Does this guy look like he could do the job and keep his energy levels up for, say, two 90min sets? Because that's what the band needs!  I'm not sure your relaxed sitting position does that for you. 

 

Keep networking though, and keep trying!

 

Cheers! 

 

Graham (66)

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In a similar boat here

 

Myself and brother in law who's a drummer both in our late 30s currently jam together once a month but we've been looking for a singer and guitarists for a while now with zero result 

 

Just got to keep on searching I guess and eventually we will strike gold 

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I recently spent the best part of a year trying to recruit a competent bass player for my soul band. I play keys in that band, so I can't do the job myself.

 

Not looking for Jamerson. Not even Duck Dunn. Just someone who would play the iconic basslines we all grew up listening to.

 

Not in an obscure, difficult-to-reach part of the country. Not even somewhere just outside Birmingham, like the OP. I'm talking NW London.

 

I was genuinely astonished at the parade of flakes and fantasists who passed through my rehearsal space. I have absolutely no delusions about my own playing ability and I wouldn't even guess that I'm "above average", but I could play all of those iconic basslines way better than any of these people and I'm talking a lot of them.

 

There are bands out there that need a competent, reliable, non-showy bassist. The trick is to find them. The 'obvious' routes like Join My Band, Gumtree and Facebook all come with so many drawbacks that I wonder why I bother. As others have already pointed out, the trick seems to be to get yourself out there, get yourself known, entice someone to invite you to join their band.

 

Go looking for all the well-run jam sessions within driving distance and start attending them regularly. Turning up once is no answer - you need to become one of the regulars, there every week, showing what you can do, available for informal chats.

 

Alternatively you can take the DEEP DIVE and try starting your own band. You want rabbit holes, I'll give you rabbit holes ...

 

 

 

 

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I was ready to give up - took a chance on an advert and I’ve never been happier with a band.

 

I’d left a really solid band which had imploded…

 

Auditioned and knocked back a couple of bands - just not right.

 

I just gave up, a band landed in my lap.

 

Join My Band is a really mad mix. Not been on in ages now…

 

I suppose my point is - it will happen, just when you least expect.

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You play well and your technique looks good but the videos make you look a bit tired - it might be better to dress like you would when you gig and set up your gear in a 'neutral space' that looks more like a studio than your front room. Either stand or sit on a stool. And you just need three or four videos as a showreel to promote you that show your playing range, perhaps crossfading  to the next song after 30 seconds - as a lot of these songs are very similar, just cos you like them doesn't mean they are selling you well.

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12 hours ago, Lozz196 said:

Having listened to a few tracks I’d describe your style as steady. As such I’d be looking at the better bands, you’re not going to be playing anything that gets in the way but your playing will provide a good foundation for great guitars and vocals on which to shine. 

100% this.

Have you tried local Facebook for musicians wanted. ? I see a lot of good stuff on there.

I would add that when i restarted playing again at 50 after 20yrs away i took on any job i could get. It was hard getting interest but I've done everything from classic rock, prog, celtic, folk, function, funk, blues, punk, Glam, 80's rock and started to get interest from others i've met along the way. My current 3 bands are all thru knowing others and being recommended by people i've known thru adverts that i've come across on JMB and Bandmix. Perhaps try going for anything until you find the right people and take it from there.

I'd maybe start looking at club bands too as they play a wide variety of styles and you'd be surprised how enjoyable that can be. 

My fav music is from 70's and many of your vids cover that and still having long hair i was surprised to find i really enjoyed playing the punk songs. A lot of my mates were really surprised when i told them LOL. It takes a lot of stamina to keep that pace up for 2.5hrs but it has that same energy as many rock songs.

I would add that age hasn't been a factor for me now 64 but i've done blues and funk rock bands with guys in their 70's and the audience don't seem to mind the age thing. 

Almost every band i've done has appreciated that i'm steady, reliable, learn the songs on time and i'm a reasonably nice guy IMHO. They don't want flash slappy show-offs with an attitude.

 

Keep at it and try not to give up.

Dave

 

Edited by dmccombe7
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To the OP what sort of band exactly do you want to be in? 

 

I'd assume from your YouTube channel you'd like to be in a classic rock covers band, but I might be wrong and if there something other than that you'd like to do your videos aren't selling it. 

 

IME experience musicians often try and sell themselves as versatile but unfortunately it comes off as directionless which can put a lot of bands off. If there are lots of styles of music that you would be happy playing I would consider doing a separate ad for each style maybe even with a separate profile for each ad.

 

As others have said you also need to do some real life networking. Go and see some bands, talk to other musicians and get your name out there.

 

I got into the two bands I currently play with through networking and a JMB ad. One band I was a fan of their music and therefore following them on Facebook so I saw that they were looking for a new bass player. For the other I put a very specific JMB ad up saying exactly what sort of music I wanted to play and what level of commitment I was prepared to put in and what I expected of any band I joined. It took almost a year before anyone answered my ad but that were exactly the sort of band I was looking for in terms of both music and the amount of gigs, rehearsals and recording sessions they wanted to do. It also helped that both bands knew who I was from my previous musical activities before I went for the audition which I believe gave me an advantage over the other applicants.

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Another point I would like to raise is the pressure of age, not on the ability to do the band thing but the pressure you put on yourself waiting for a band opportunity to come along !

For us older musicians we know time is against us compared to when you’re young and I find that fear puts pressure on you mentally with thoughts like I may as well quit because time is running out 

 

There needs to be something better than JMB and Bandmix but I’m not sure what and local Facebook helps too but in reality there are so few bands around and I’ve even read in here some of us /you are playing in more than one band so again the chances of finding an opportunity are less and less especially for new arrivals looking for their first band.

 

Like many I’ve being gigging on and off for 40yrs and this seems to be about the worse time to find bands I’ve ever known ( thank you Covid ) 

 

But stay positive and keep looking 

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36 minutes ago, asingardenof said:

Have you tried replying to others' adverts as well?

Of course, I look on JMB every day and I'm always applying to ads that appeal to me, but quite often they don't even reply, or if they do, they then take days, sometimes weeks to get back to me.

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16 minutes ago, thebrig said:

Of course, I look on JMB every day and I'm always applying to ads that appeal to me, but quite often they don't even reply, or if they do, they then take days, sometimes weeks to get back to me.

That's what i found with JMB that it took ages to get a reply from bands. It left me thinking that maybe they weren't that interested in getting a replacement at all or even get their band moving forward but i stuck it out and i did eventually get a band thru it.

Dave

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Thanks again for the comments, and I have to admit that some of you have confirmed what I have suspected all along, and that is:


Age has finally caught up with me and I now look old and tired, which is probably putting people off.


My videos are uninspiring, and that sitting down whilst playing isn't helping, but the problem I have is that I don't have much footage of me playing live, and those that I do have are mainly of my last band Stupidity, which specialised in old school pub-rock, which is my favourite genre, I also like classic rock a lot too, but I am open to playing most styles.


I did find this video of me at a jam a few years ago, but I have to admit that I was extremely nervous because I had only just learn't the song a couple of hours before the session, so I didn't really know it that well and my playing isn't great.

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I know these are a bit genre specific being old-school RnB/pub-rock, but would I be better off using these videos as demos?

The audio isn't great, but at least they do show me playing in a "live" environment, warts and all.

 

I'm open to playing most styles, but I can't find any live footage of myself playing other genres.

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10 minutes ago, Dad3353 said:

These last videos ^^ are a far better 'selling point' than the cleanly-produced 'couch' ones, in my opinion. :friends:

Yep, I think you are right.

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